Kickangels

Once again I fell victim to deceptive video box art. Even though actress Melissa Moore appears prominently on the cover brandishing a gun, there is no gunplay in this pathetic low budget martial arts action film. The biggest problem with this film about a female kick-boxing competition is that none of the girls can fight! The main actress, who is billed as a legitimate award winning martial artist, only exhibits a handful of different moves, and all of her semi-competent fight scenes are laughably performed by a male stunt double in drag! Another fine example of an American girl-fu film that completely misses the mark.

No one could be "fooled" by the box in which this film is marketed: it depicts martial arts chicks, flexing and fighting in their Spandex thongs, and that is exactly what it delivers. Cat Sassoon is even better here than in her previous masterpiece "Dance With Death" - when she fights off several ninjas wearing nothing but a pair of black bikini panties, any true fan of the genre should shudder in the grim knowledge that A) this is a truly cheesy film, and should be enjoyed as such, and B) Sassoon's are some of the fakest breasts in Hollywood, and that's saying a lot. Even during roundhouse kicks, they stand hard and fast, refusing to move. Now that's grade Z kung fu cinema. Grade: A-

On the hunt for vintage T&A flicks, I came across 'Angelfist' on a list. I was intrigued as it looked unique standing out from all those screwball comedies, hot lady cops, prison flicks, love trysts, missions to get laid and countless bikini romps within the genre. It's low budget thru & thru and while the action I hoped for isn't great the obvious doses of female skin are here in a paper thin story that's serviceable.

When her kickboxer sister Kristie (Sibel Birzag) is killed while competing in the Philippines, tough LA cop Katara "Kat" Lang (Cat Sassoon) goes down there looking for answers. Inserting herself into the tournament, she finds out her sister was witness to the murder of an American Army Colonel having took photos and there's a conspiracy at the heart of the country's civil unrest. Can she get those pics, win the tournament and stay alive?

I naively hoped 'Angelfist' could deliver the required nudity, somehow be a female equivalent to 'Kickboxer' in terms of decent production values and fight sequences. I know, I know. The fight choreography is weak. I had forgotten for a moment that even a cheap b-movie can spring for a decent movie box. No one here is really a skilled martial artist and there's very little gunplay.

However it's not without charms. There's some awful dubbing, cheese grade acting, woefully inadequate villains (some of who run around dressed like ninjas) and gratuitous shower scenes. Not to mention the silliness of Kat in action as a LA cop and saying she's a black belt in taekwondo like that's a legit fighting style. They marketed her as a World Karate Association North American Champion (hint: its made up).

Produced by Roger Corman and helmed by Philippines director Cirio H. Santiago, 'Angelfist' half delivered like I sheepishly wanted. I'd later learn this was the director's blueprint for very similar movies with his specialty - female topless fight scenes - a treat and the late Sassoon is easy on the eyes. As is Melissa Moore as a rival fighter who once posed for Playboy and is probably most well known for her appearance in the cult film 'Samurai Cop'. With an 80 minute runtime things move at a brisk pace and remain titillating if you're game.

Angel Fist was a decent low-budget martial arts movie, I've seen this movie lots. The main attractions are Cat Sassoon & Melissa Moore going undercover and competing in the kick boxing tournament wearing their tight spandex shorts and bathing suits/leotard. I normally watch this movie and fast forward to the fight scenes. I think Melissa Moore just looks so hot in her first match at the tournament, seeing her in dark blue spandex shorts and a yellow one piece bathing suit and in her second match later in the movie she was in her white sports bra and spandex shorts with a black swimsuit thong. As far as Cat Sassoon goes she was just in her sports bra and spandex shorts from her match in the kick boxing tournament to her last match near the end of the movie.

Its the fifth time i see this plot redone and never understood how it was so popular, if you saw blood fist all the other rip...remakes are extremely predictable and you spoiled yourself meaning your watching it for the fight scenes and in this case for the tits. In this take its women doing the fighting in gymnastic tights cause why not. As it feels very generic its at least goes back to its roots meaning its shot in Philipines, in a female karate tournament to please horny men as they watch women beat the living hell out of each other.

Not going to get into the plot as if you saw the other movies you pretty much know everything but if you don't my guess you saw this to get off watching women fighting and seeing them naked, the only character from the original is Baby and this time he is given a ridiculous name as well Alcatraz why...never explained but he gets the His butt kicked around most of the movie. Why would you watch this well i listed some people that would and there reasons if not well to say nostalgia?

Be my guest and look at another take on a story so redone that its most likely someone will use it now a days.