Blood Harvest

'60s ukulele-playing pop-star Tiny Tim's contributions to horror: that disturbing 'Tiptoe Through The Tulips' song featured in Insidious (2010) to great effect, and this late '80s slasher, in which the falsetto singer dons clown make-up and garb to play Mervo, a crazy weirdo who may or may not be a psycho killer.

The film begins with beauty Jill (Itonia Salchek) returning to her hometown to visit her parents, who have been harangued by the locals on account of her father working at the bank that is overseeing the foreclosure of several farmsteads. When she gets home, Jill's parents are nowhere to be found and the walls are daubed with threatening graffiti; the local sheriff does little to investigate. Old childhood friend Gary (Dean West) tries to calm Jill's nerves, but she feels increasingly uneasy, especially with Gary's oddball brother Mervo hanging around and snooping on her. To make matters worse, other people in Jill's life start to disappear, including her boyfriend Scott (Peter Krause) and best friend Sarah. Is Mervo responsible?

Wisconsin-based horror auteur Bill Rebane fails to keep up the brisk pace necessary for such nonsense, and some stretches are duller than watching wheat grow, but he knows well enough to include plenty of nudity courtesy of sexy Salchek, and some decent gore to keep viewers watching, the blood-letting including some convincing throat slashings (the effects far better than I expected). Rebane also makes the most of Tiny Tim, who proves effectively unsettling throughout, singing a few creepy ditties and generally acting convincingly deranged.

It's far from a top-tier '80s slasher (but then few late'-80s slashers are), but there's just about enough fun to be had to make it of interest to fans of the genre. 5/10.

Basically there are only two reasons to see "Blood Harvest" First, the falsetto wonder that was "Tiny Tim", playing "Marvelous Mervo", a drooling, slack jawed, giggling clown. Second, Itonia Salachek playing a naked girl throughout the film. Forget plot and acting skills, live with the fact that this is not the viscera-stained, sex, sleaze, and horror epic it is claimed to be. What "Blood Harvest" is, is a curiosity, much like a crowd would be drawn to a carnival sideshow, you sort of have to keep watching for the next "Mervo" appearance, or excuse for Itonia to lose her clothes. Certainly watchable, but just barely. - MERK

A young woman (Itona Salochek) comes back from college to find her parents missing and their home vandalized. She suspects the worst since her dad was in charge of foreclosing on local farms for the bank. The local sheriff is less than helpful though (he's much more interested in his softball league). Meanwhile, she finds herself the object of rather obsessive attention from her former childhood boyfriend and his oddball, mentally challenged brother (Tiny Tim) who sings creepy songs and dresses up like clown (the "Marvelous Mervo").

For some reason, slasher fans don't seem to care for this movie, perhaps because the first murder doesn't occur until some forty minutes in. They're certainly suitably bloody though with victims being tied up upside-down and their throats slit so they can be bled like pigs. There's also a lot of time for character development, which in the case of Ms. Salochek fortunately means many long, completely gratuitous, full-frontal nude scenes (She's actually not that attractive with her clothes on, but wait until she takes them off. Wow!) This is also kind of an unusual setting for a slasher movie. If John Cougar Mellencamp ever made a horror movie it might look something like this. The director, Bill Rebane, is one of these guys who can't really be called "good" or "talented", but his movies are always interesting. He once dressed a VW Bug up as a giant spider in "The Giant Spider Invasion". "The Capture of Bigfoot" was one of the most wacko of many wacko 70's bigfoot movies. "The Demons of Ludlow" was the touching story of a small Midwestern town and their demonically-possessed grand piano. This movie is pretty much the same way, especially considering the main stars were a never-to-be-seen-again Eastern European actress who can't keep her clothes on for five minutes, and Tiny Tim, a VERY odd folk singer from the late 1960's. (He's surprisingly good though).

It does have its flaws. It's pretty slow in places, and the identity of the killer is pretty obvious as there are only two or three possible suspects (and one them is the reddest herring imaginable). Still, I saw this movie back-to-back with "Nail Gun Massacre", a movie slasher-movie fans really rave about, but I liked this one far better. Recommended, no matter what anyone else says.

Blood Harvest (1987)

** (out of 4)

Jill (Itonia Salchek) returns home to her parent's farm in Wisconsin and she quickly learns that the town people aren't too happy with them. She also soon realizes that both of them are missing and before long she and her friends come under attack by a masked maniac who enjoys cutting throats. Is it the mentally disturbed Mervo (Tiny Tim)?

Director Bill Rebane (THE GIANT SPIDER INVASION) apparently saw TIny Tim at a local fair and decides to pitch him on the idea of appearing in a slasher film. Apparently Tim liked the idea or perhaps he needed the money but either way the end result is a rather interesting slasher and one that for the most part is entertaining.

If you're expecting a masterpiece or some sort of high art then you're going to be disappointed because BLOOD HARVEST clearly wears its low-budget. The various trappings of low-budget horror films from this era are on full display but if you're a fan of the genre then you know that you just have to deal with those. Outside of that there's a fairly interesting movie here that works on several levels.

For starters, I actually thought the story itself was good enough for this type of film and I really enjoy the lead character even though the screenplay allows her to do some rather stupid things. I thought the entire set-up was decent and I'd argue that the settings were good. The film also offers up some good gore effects as long as you're watching the uncut version. Apparently the director went back and edited out some gore and nudity when he was running for office (?!?!?) so be sure you get the complete version.

The film also offers up quite a bit of nudity from lead actress Itonia Salchek and that's certainly not a bad thing. In fact, I must say that I thought she delivered a good and fun performance. As I said, there are countless low-budget issues here but I thought the actress helped make the film entertaining. The supporting players are decent but, again, the low-budget leads to some less- than-wonderful performances. With that said, seeing Tiny Tim in this kind of movie just adds a whole new atmosphere that you won't find in any other slasher.

BLOOD HARVEST isn't a masterpiece and it's certainly not a classic. It's not even a "good" movie but if you're a fan of the genre then it's certainly worth watching and I think the film rightfully deserves its cult following.

The only reason this movie is worth watching is because of the lovely Itonia Salchek. To bad we never saw this hottie again in anything else.

I had planned on buying the DVD for this very reason only to find from several reviews the movie has been cut worse than any of the victums in the movie.