Super Naturals

I am a huge fan of zombie movies, so, when I found this one, I jumped to the chance of renting it. And then I knew I made a bad choice.

The movie is about a group of army recruits being led into the backwoods by their head sergeant, Uhura from Star Trek. And I'll be damned if this wasn't another sequel to those Police Academy movies or something. From that marching band music, to goofy acting, to constant joking, and so on, I was really thinking this was like the 8th sequel, "Assignment in Alabama" or something. And that wasn't a good sign.

Eventually, some "supernatural" stuff starts to happen, relating back to some flashback of a kid walking through a minefield with all these Confederate soldiers, only to have all of them blown away, except for him. A very cheesy scene. There's this woman the group finds, and apparently, they have no questioning as to who she really is, or what she's doing there. She's just with them now.

I was starting to fall asleep until finally some guy got killed by two zombies in an underground bunker. Then there's that, "We've found a body, now let's find the killer" scheme until finally, that night, there is...yes...a shoot-out between zombies--which we barely ever see--and the recruits, who are getting killed left and right. But it's no bloodbath.

There's a lot of scenes with this one guy and the zombies, while Uhura and some other chick hide behind rocks with a few other survivors and shoot at zombies. It was all really lame, until the terrible ending that had nothing resembling a climax. And then it ended. We saw an equivalent of ten zombies in the whole movie, uninteresting deaths, and basically no horror. Skip this one. It's not only a bad zombie movie, it's a bad horror movie in total.

This is another movie to put on the ALRIGHT chart. Scottish-born Maxwell Caulfield and Star Treks Nichelle Nichols go down to the woods and get a big surprise. No, not Jason, ZOMBIES! A force that has brought back the dead confederate soldiers to wreak revenge on some recruits. The direction isn't up to much, the story is quite shoddy and the characters are wimps apart from the 2 listed above. The scares of being chased through the woods are quite enjoyable and the shoot-outs are quite good. But to be honest, I've seen more gore in Scooby-Doo than in this! 5.5 out of 10.

From the film-maker of "He Knows You're Alone" (1980) "and "Distortions" (1987); Director Armand Mastroianni's generic survival zombie feature "The Supernaturals" has a good concept (army recruits on a training mission in the woods of the Deep South encounter dead confederate soldiers), which isn't entirely realised. In the end it's a passable low-budget, b-grade presentation that's a little too sloppy and uneventful, but is genuinely moody and atmospheric in its backwoods setting. Mastroianni's use of lighting, shadow work and a fog machine, installs some eerie imagery and a few nasty jolts in the back-end. However it really does take its time, before its final payoff --- the characters that you spend a lot of time with aren't particularly an interesting bunch (with some abysmal dialogues too). The scratchy plot doesn't explain all that much about what's going on; it's rather unusual and vague, but this does come off rather daft and cheesy in its on going build-ups. Although it does gradually get better as it goes along. The performances are decent enough (Nichelle Nichols, a pinning Maxwell Caulfield and Talia Balsam) and look out for a cameo by one of the Bee Gees; Maurice Gibb as a Union soldier. At times lousy, ponderous but tautly constructed with some striking visuals and commendable make-up FX when on show.

The Supernaturals is pure 80's cheese. It's corny, has terrible acting, and is full of stereotypes (the nerd, the black guy with the radio, and the horny white guy for starters). So why then do I like this movie? Is it because of the Star Trek alumni (Uhura and La Forge), the best Abraham Lincoln impersonator I've ever seen, or LeVar Burton's sinister mustache? None of the above. It's because The Supernaturals is one of those movies from my childhood. I saw it years ago and it just grows on you. It's extremely cheesy, but likable. It's a non-traditional zombie/ghost story and that alone should make zombie fans want to see it. There is a lack of gore, however, the zombies look cool, when visible. Actually I don't know why this movie is rated R. Maxwell Caulfield is always great too. He is a fine example of wasted B movie talent. The Supernaturals is worth at least one viewing.

I've read some pretty extreme (both positive and negative) reviews for this movie, but it's really a very middle-of-the-road affair. It's directed competently enough to keep you from feeling that you totally wasted your time with it, but it's also so derivative that it can even be called a ripoff (especially of Herschell Gordon Lewis' "Two Thousand Maniacs"; it has practically the same plot). The opening sequence is the best. (**)