Ghoul School

I respectfully disagree that this movie will be anything CLOSE to a "cult classic." As an avid fan of low-budget/no-budget schlock, this film is a waste of time. A few people with green faces run around an almost empty school chasing people. The chicks on the cover are nowhere in the movie. Even the ending is dumb.

Repetitive quips about chlorine; endless scenes of mullet-wearing jocks failing to shoot basketball hoops; a metal band who only play one tune and whose supposedly great singer seems to have forgotten his lyrics; a confused looking TV chat show host and a desperately unfunny comedian (played convincingly by a confused looking TV chat show host and a desperately unfunny comedian) exchanging crap one-liners; and a geek with a strange lower lip: this is just some of the inane garbage to be found in Ghoul School—quite simply, one of the lamest excuses for a horror comedy that I have ever had the misfortune to see (and I've seen quite a few).

This dreadful film opens with a pair of losers busting their way into the basement of a school, where they try to force the janitor to reveal the whereabouts of.... err... well, actually, I have no idea what it is they are after, but they don't find it. After shooting the janitor for his lack of co-operation, the pair locate a hidden room in which they discover a control panel with two big buttons, one of which they decide to push; this releases chemicals into the school's water supply, turning anyone unfortunate enough to come in contact with the contaminated H20 into slavering, blue, pointy toothed monsters hungry for human flesh.

Clearly aware of the clumsy, derivative, and totally nonsensical nature of his own poorly constructed script (a muddled blend of Return Of The Living Dead and Demons), writer/director Timothy O'Rawe doesn't waste any energy trying to deliver genuine laughs or scares, preferring instead to chance his luck with the 'let's make this so bad, it might get a cult following' route. The gamble doesn't pay off: this is so bad, it's unbearable, and is unlikely to find a following even amongst the craziest of horror fans.

Avoid.

Don't bother. I'm a self-made authority on "good" B-movies, and this ain't one of them. It might have been alright were it not so self-conscious in its clearly purposeful attempts at badness. In other words, if the stuff in this straight-to-video yawner were unintentional (as in "Troll 2," for example), it might be worth a look. But, since it's not, neither is this movie.

Even with a new package with a school girl in a bloodied uniform on the DVD cover doesn't do much to lift up this movie. I remember seeing the movie back in the 90's sometime, but had only a vague recollection of the movie not being memorable. Come 2013 and I bought the DVD version from Amazon. Why? Well because I am a fan of anything zombie.

"Ghoul School" is low budget, yes, but it does seem like people were having fun filming the movie and the best was made possible with what was available back in 1990. But despite this, then the end result is not overly enjoyable. I guess my memory from the 90's wasn't wrong after all...

The storyline, or what was there of it, was mostly appearing like something that was put together from an array of incomprehensible scenes of footage. The red line throughout the movie was fairly weak and snapped at times. And I must admit that I started to find my attention drifting to my phone, because of the poorly constructed mockery of a storyline.

As for the ghouls (or zombies) in the movie. Well, they were running around and I was laughing most of the times when I saw them. The make-up was really bad, and for some reason you get jagged, edged, pointy teeth in your entire mouth when you die and come back as a ghoul (or zombie).

Special effects-wise, well then "Ghoul School" was spectacular in its own way. How so? Well, because the effects were hilarious and so painfully fake. I particularly loved the thin latex tubes filled with blood, it was so bad.

I don't think that this movie was particularly scary or funny even back in 1990. And I do remember the "Friday the 13th" and "Nightmare on Elm Street" movies I grew up with had better effects than this movie, and they are significantly older.

I have seen worse movies with the undead, but "Ghoul School" is high on that list. There is nothing interesting to aim for in this movie, and I honestly can't think of a reason as to why anyone would want to sit down and watch this movie.

A high-school swim team is turned into zombies after a chemical leaks into the water supply right before a school sponsored rock concert. It's up to some nerds to stop them. Horrible dialog, a nonsense plot, beyond crappy editing, combine to make a supremely unwatchable horror/comedy. When Jackie the Joke Man is far and away the best 'actor' in this, you KNOW you've entered the ninth circle of Hell. What the hell can I say good about the piece of cap? Ummm... hold on I'm thinking. Well the lighting is OK in parts, I guess.

My Grade: F

DVD Extras: Commentary with Timothy O'Rawe, Second commentary with Micheal Raso; 6 minutes of chlorine jokes by Jackie Marline; Makeup FX segment; 3 short films by O'Rawe; Promo Reel with optional commentary; 2 theatrical trailers (one for 1990 and one for 2004); Trailers for "the Feral Man", "the Bonesetter", "Demon Summer", and "Midnight Skater"