Dream Machine

This week, I just thought it would be fun to catch up with Corey Haim, with just having seen the two "Lost Boys" films last week and all. Not that I'm a fan-boy - not by far - but I did like those two Coreys in some films back in my early teen days.

So, I prepared myself for three films starring him. Unfortunately, I picked "Dream Machine" as a first (never seen it before), and it was so godawfully horrible, I just decided to lock Corey back in my closet and let him sober up again first, before I pop in something else of his. But I managed to struggle my way through this film first. I had the impression it desperately wanted to play in the same league as "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" (1986) but got caught up in its own delusions. Practically the whole film it wants to be a comedy and near the end it hopelessly tries to be a thriller. The only good thing about "Dream Machine" is the premise: A dead body in the trunk of a Porsche. All the rest fails so badly, it's embarrassing. Even the most for Haim. I can dig him being his young, enthusiastic self, but at least when he comes with some form of directorial guidelines. This clearly wasn't the case in "Dream Machine". So, we have a perfect car, yes, that black Porsche. Haim's perfect girlfriend? Just a blonde chick who hardly has any lines in the film. The perfect murder... almost? Some dude that falls flat on his ass as the villain of the film, trying the whole movie to steal the body back out of the trunk, never really succeeds, and then at the end of the film thinks he's Michael Myers (minus the white William Shatner mask) and mistakes Corey Haim for Jamie Lee Curtis. Don't think they could have made this flick any lamer if they tried. A stupid, unfunny film with a story that leads to nowhere directed by a director that doesn't know how to direct his cast. Great accomplishment!

One last question for Mr. Haim: Who's idea was it to have you smile directly into the camera in that last shot of the movie? Yours or the director's? So not done.

I hope the viewer who regards 'Dream Machine' as one of Corey Haim's finest and the "best movies of the century" was kidding. Undetected sarcasm on my part? I sincerely hope so.

'The Dream Machine' marks the first of a long line of mediocre capers that would plague the rest of Corey Haim's career (except 'Prayer of the Rollerboys' which was surprisingly decent). Here, Haim plays nonchalant college boy, Bernie, who supposes that a cool car will attract his dream girl's attention. Lucky for Bernie, a rich woman aiming to get back at her cheating husband, hastily decides to reward her faithful piano tuner--Bernie--with a gift: a slick Porsche Turbo. However, unbeknownst to the woman, and unfortunate for Bernie, is that her dead husband was murdered and his body was hidden in the trunk. Now, being that in this movie, bodies don't seem to decay or possess a rather foul funk, Bernie is unaware of this. In fact, the oblivious boy has no idea that something suspicious is afoot despite several odd circumstances that arise. In particular, a grizzly man follows him around, desperate to get hold of that body relatively undetected.

This is a low-grade action fizzle as many of Haim's films like this are (see The Double O Kid). Despite being part action, part romantic comedy, this movie fails to offer the viewer much of anything of interest for at least the first forty-five minutes in which the filmmakers take more than enough time to show the immediate problem (i.e. Bernie being in possession of a car and a dead body, and a hit-man finding out that the Porsche is going to be hard to find). After which, and thanks to poor acting by Haim (I loved this kid, too, but it's not exactly sacrilegious to admit the times when he obviously couldn't act well) and the lack of real immediacy and emergency between Bernie and the villain that makes much of the events unconvincing and as a result, inappreciable. To add injury to insult, the soundtrack was unbelievably laughable and sounded more like self-evident songs you would hear in Team America (see the 'date' montage).

Loyal Corey Haim fans, however, should not be disappointed to see their boy in abundance. However, others understanding that Haim's career probably peaked when he was 14 or 15 and never recovered, might expect mediocrity, as will viewers just looking for early 90s b-comedy fluff to pass the time.

Once again, I was browsing through the discount video bin and picked up this movie for $4.88. Fifty-percent of the time the movies I find in the bin are pure crap (I mean horrible beyond belief) but half the time they turn out to be surprisingly good. This movie is much better than I expected. I found it very engaging, though it was obviously made by an amateur.

The direction is nothing special, but the story is intriguing with some good thrills. I expected it to be more of a comedy, but I wasn't too disappointed.

For a thriller, this movie is surprisingly good-natured. There's no bloody violence, no profanity, no nudity, no sex. Usually, these movies require all four of those elements. The PG rating is well-deserved--not like "Sixteen Candles" where the "f" word is used twice and there's a brief gratuitous nude scene.

I just wish the romance between Corey Haim and his love interest could've been developed more. The film does tend to be plot-heavy, and the potentially good subplots are pushed off to the side. Instead of developing a chemistry between the two of them, we end up watching a careless three-minute montage of them on their romantic endeavors. They end up kissing at the end, but there's so little chemistry that it seems forced.

"The Dream Machine" is no gem, but it's good, clean entertainment. It's quite forgettable--especially with a cast of unknowns, except for Haim--but it's also much better than you'd expect.

My score: 7 (out of 10)

My review was written in September 1991 after watching the film on Live video cassette.

Wish fulfillment is the theme of this energetic feature, mainly a video title but released theatrically in September in Miami and Denver."Risky Business" clone plays well and should rent well.

With "Fast Getaway" and "Prayer of the Rollerboys" also recently to his credit, Corey Haim makes a convincing young hero in this light action-comedy. Here he's a college freshman in Colorado (pic was made in Utah) who is suffering fraternity hazing.

Highly unlikely plot line has Haim receive the gift of a new Porschee fro Susan Seaforth Hayes after he tunes her piano. Car was a gift to her philandering husband (Jeremy Slate), and Hayes gives the dream machine away in spite.

Their son-in-law, one-dimensional villain Randall England, has murdered Slate after being caught embezzling from their family firm and stashed the corpse in the Porsche's trunk. All hell breaks out as he chases Haim around town trying to get the car (and evidence) back.

As with Tom Cruise in "Risky Business" and the imitative Matthew Broderick hit "Ferris Bueller's Day Off", the premise here is identification with a young hero in possession of a fabulous car while parents are away. Haim uses the vehicle to impress would-be girlfriend Brittney Lewis and to escape handily from both the relentless heavy England and frat pranksters led by Tracy Fraim.

Given a light touch by filmmaker Lyman Dayton, the package is a pleasant diversion. Topicality of pic's key subplot concerning dangerous hazing practice is sidestepped as Fraim successfully humanizes his role.

Cast is solid, with dreamgirl Lewis a striking new face. Stunts and production values are good.

1991 marked the year Corey Haim disappeared from mainstream films and started running around in cheap B-movies consisting of more or less silly action and a pretty girl or two. Dream Machine was his second such film of the year, after Fast Getaway, and granted, it's actually a step up from that one. The plot is moronic, but the film is a puerile and not altogether unengaging celebration of the ultimate fantasies of male youth: pretty girls, fast cars, and pranks. The scenes involving Haim's frat boys liven things up and constitute a fun contrast to the perversely sombre Randall England as the antagonist Lance. Haim does well enough with what he has to work with, and although he and Brittney Lewis look like an unlikely couple at first, the young Canadian has the charisma to make you believe he could woo her.