À l'épreuve des balles

Move over, Rambo, there's a new one-man-army in town... and he knows how to play the sax. That makes him a real deadly enemy!

Gary Busey, one of my favorite B-squad actors, is Frank "Bulletproof" McBain, an ex-CIA agent who can't be harmed by bullets and likes to give his foes weird names like "Butthorn" (I guess that's a softer version of the word a##-hole!). He uses big guns, plays the saxaphone, and really whups the crap out of his enemies. Oh, and he gets the chicks, too. I know, this film sounds really derivative and ridiculous at first, but if you have the right patience, you could wind up enjoying this film. Busey is a great actor because he's the kind that can portray any character. For example, in "Lethal Weapon", he's a sleazy villain, and in "Bulletproof", he's an all-out, gung ho hero. His ability to play any man is what really impresses me the most. If you want to see Busey as a dirtbag or a psycho, watch "Lethal Weapon" or "Under Siege", or if you like to see him as a womanizing or wisecracking good guy, either "Bulletproof", or "Point Break" are your choices.

I had such high hopes for this movie when I discovered it. Not only does it star my favorite actor of all time (Henry Silva), but it serves as the vehicle for Gary Busey's ill-fated and misguided debut as an action star! Unfortunately, I was pretty let down by the time the end credits rolled. The only redeeming aspect of this dated movie is the first half-hour, which is a pathetic attempt to mimic Lethal Weapon-styled buddy cop movies. Like many other action flicks starring big ego second-tier stars (Steven Seagal being our number one offender here), they really try to build up the main character as a devil-may-care indestructible ex-CIA supercop who all the bad guys know about. Notice during the ice cream truck chase when the villains have this exchange after they pound Busey's car with bullets:

Villain 1: I think we blew him off! Villain 2: You don't blow up a dude like McBain!

The story is pretty lame once it gets going. McBain is hired by the army to retrieve a tank named "Thunderblast" (!) that seems to be some armored afterbirth of the Reagan-era military buildup. Henry Silva's role is pretty wasted as a Libyan colonel who is working alongside the Commies. Aside from the hilariously bad first half hour and the introduction of the word "butthorn" into popular lexicon, Bulletproof is pretty much a waste of time.

There's uber cheesy 1980s action nonsense and then there's "Bulletproof". This thing is so utterly daft it may lead one to believe that the filmmakers had their tongues in their cheeks to some degree. It's cheerfully dumb fun that should have viewers busting a gut, or shaking their heads at the ridiculousness of it all. The good guy is a seemingly indestructible goof ball and the villains are all pure one dimensional scum - not that that's a bad thing. In movies like "Bulletproof", that's what you hope for. There's plenty of explosions and plenty of gunfire; this may be stupid, but it sure as hell ain't boring.

A lively, hilarious Gary Busey is cop Frank "Bulletproof" McBain, so nicknamed because of the amount of bullets that his body has taken (39 and counting). He keeps these souvenirs in a mason jar in his bathroom. He's forcibly pressed back into service by the military after they've *deliberately* allowed a super duper tank of theirs to be snatched up by terrorists. McBain, almost a one man show, takes on all comers, including a Mexican creep named Brogado (Rene Enriquez of 'Hill Street Blues'), a Libyan goon named Kartiff (a priceless Henry Silva), and a Russian thug played by the eternally bad ass William Smith.

Director Steve Carver ("Big Bad Mama", "Lone Wolf McQuade") was an old hand at action by this point, and he keeps this patently absurd story moving right along. The cast is full of familiar faces, so buffs can have a good time playing Spot the Character Actor; Thalmus Rasulala ("Blacula"), L.Q. Jones ("The Wild Bunch"), Mills Watson ("Cujo"), R.G. Armstrong ("Race with the Devil"), Luke Askew ("Rolling Thunder"), Lincoln Kilpatrick ("The Omega Man"), delectable Lydie Denier ("Satan's Princess"), Juan Fernandez ("The Collector"), Redmond Gleeson ("Dreamscape"), and the great Danny Trejo all turn up as well. Smith and Silva are delicious in their roles; one has to hand it to Silva for having his swarthy villain act down pat after so many years of practice. "In my country, women have RESPECT!" Lovely Darlanne Fluegel plays McBains' former flame, one of the Army personnel who've been captured along with the tank.

One need never worry about having to tax their brains when it comes to entertainment such as "Bulletproof". It's an absolute hoot from beginning to end.

Eight out of 10.

Oh Lord, did I enjoy myself watching this film! Gary Busey plays a guy who apparently cannot be harmed by bullets, or by much of anything, although he's just some guy with no immortal powers. He falls off haylofts, gets chained to giant wheels and rolls down hills, runs a very comfy looking army tank, and plays the tenor saxophone. Too much goes on to list, but the world's greatest and most enigmatic insult, "butt-horn", is coined, making this easily the most important film of the century. I insist that you purchase it.

What an incomprehensible mess of a movie. Something about a cop who extracts bullets from himself after he gets shot and keeps them in a glass jar in his bathroom (and from the size of the jar he's been shot about fifty times by now) and a top secret tank guarded by five or six incompetent soldiers who for some reason drive it into Mexico. Whether they were sent there intentionally or just got really really lost is never made clear. And you'll never hear another screenplay feature the word "butthorn" either. Gary Busey tries out the Mel Gibson role from "Lethal Weapon" and while Busey is a serviceable actor the screenplay damns the whole movie to mediocrity. William Smith does another turn as a Russian soldier, the same character he played in "Red Dawn" a few years earlier. After playing biker heavies for most of the 70s it was sort of nice to see him expand his range playing Communist heavies. Sadly he'll probably always be remembered best as the guy who Clint Eastwood whupped in "Every Which Way You Can."