Terreur cannibale

Ah, the wondrous mysteries of late 70's/early 80's Euro-exploitation cinema… With almost a 100% positive certainty, the script of this film was improvised along whilst shooting. Judging by the tone and cheerful atmosphere of the opening sequences, it doesn't even look like the creators (Alain Deruelle and Julio Tabernero) ever intended to make a movie about cannibals, but maybe the producers forced them in order to quickly cash in on the gigantic success of contemporary horror-hits like "Cannibal Holocaust" and "Cannibal Ferox". As you probably know, everything was possible in the exploitation industry, even hiring the notorious smut filmmaker Jess Franco to shoot some additional footage. The film opens with a rhythmic and jolly carnival song, introduces several comical characters and a potentially interesting (but poorly elaborated) kidnapping/ransom plot. The cannibal tribe and obligatory grossness only kicks in after about 40 minutes and comes across as totally ridiculous. Three amateur thugs, one voluptuous woman and two guys, randomly decide to abduct the daughter of a wealthy businessman and demand a ransom. When one of their accomplices gets involved in a banal car accident, they flee towards the jungle (I think the South American) and seek shelter in the hut of a friend. Nearby there's a tribe of primitive cannibals, but they appear to remain politely within their perimeters. Only when one of the thugs rapes the lady of the house, her husband almost literally feeds them to the cannibals. Meanwhile, the parents of the kidnapped girl have also arrived in the jungle (don't ask me how, though), but they're good people and hence don't get eaten. Needless to say "Cannibal Terror" is an incredibly bad film and I honestly can't name one good element, apart maybe from the jolly theme song. Sure, there's a bit of nasty gore, but there's absolutely no prior tension building and the actual munching goes on for far too long. You know you're in trouble when even the gory bits in a movie are dull. The acting performances are atrocious. The lines of the little girl are practically inaudible and I'm pretty sure an adult woman imitating the voice of a child spoke them. The "jungle" setting is quite hilarious, as the film is clearly shot in someone's home garden and the "natives" are plain white day-players. Several of them even have sideburns and sophisticated haircuts. Oh dear

For years, Cannibal Terror was believed by many to be the work of horror/sleaze director Jess Franco, a reasonable assumption since the film bears what seem to be most of the prolific Spaniard's hallmarks, most notably a dreadful script, unconvincing locales, inept direction, terrible acting, and endless meandering shots of nothing much in particular (and I guess, for some, it was also hard to believe that there might be another person out there who could make films quite as bad as Franco).

The real culprit, however, was French director Alain Deruelle, who proves that he can be just as inept as Jess when it comes to delivering jungle horror.

Deruelle's dreadful film follows a trio bumbling kidnappers-two men and one woman-who escape across the border (to where, I have no idea!) with their hostage, the young daughter of a rich businessman. Arriving at a safe house that borders 'cannibal country', the threesome are able to relax for a while, until one of the gang, Mario, decides to rape the wife of their host (after spying on her having a wash in a giant wooden bucket). This kick starts a chain of events that results in the criminals and their hostage being pursued by bloodthirsty natives, with the father of the little girl in hot pursuit.

Taking a leaf out of Franco's Big Book of Cannibal Movie-Making, Deruelle opts to set his adventure in what appears to be a large botanical garden, hires himself some of the least convincing cannibals ever to grace an exploitation film (some have sideburns, many have coiffured hair, a few have beer-bellies, nearly all of them are Caucasion, but none of them look like savages), and throws in some cheapo blood and guts (using what looks like pig carcasses to stand in for human remains) in order to satisfy the gore-hounds.

The result is a mind-numbingly dull piece of Euro-sleaze that now shares top spot with Mondo Cannibale on my Crap Cannibal Movie list.

Many suspect that this film was directed by Jess Franco because it's very similar to (and at least as bad as)two Eurocine films he DID direct--"Mondo Cannibale" and "Sexo Cannibale". The movie in fact was made by some of Franco's cronies at the low-rent French production house Eurocine. One of the directors on record was another Spaniard, Julio Tabernero, who directed the superior film "Sexy Cat", but since that film has no cannibals in it, it will probably never get the kind of upscale DVD release this one--and the two Franco cannibal films--have gotten in recent years. There's just no justice in the world.

There's no point in rehashing the idiotic plot again. Everything about this is laughably unconvincing from the horribly dubbed dialogue to obviously European "cannibals" to the "jungle" setting which was obviously a European zoo. The canned sound effects include one bird who seems to be chirping all the time in every single place in the "jungle". The public domain music is imported entirely from Mexico (with horrid variations on such standards as "La Bamba" and "La Cucaracha"), a country not exactly famous for its cannibalistic tribes. (If this had been an actual Franco film, it would have at least had better music).

Franco-regular Anthony Mayans has a small role here. Pamela Stanford has a nice nude scene, which is literally the ONLY worthwhile scene in the entire movie. Sabrina Siani, the heroine of "Mondo Cannibal" has a a don't-blink-or-you'll-miss-it cameo, which (aside from her not being naked) is probably her best role ever since she makes no attempt whatsoever to act (actually she made no attempt whatsoever to act in "Mondo Cannibale" either, but the horny producers still insisted on casting her as the lead). But I'm obviously really grasping at straws to find ANYTHING nice to say about this. This movie has nowhere near the power of an Italian cannibal flick like "Cannibal Holocaust" and frankly it barely rises to the level of a bad Jess Franco imitation. Avoid with extreme prejudice.

Well, what else can you say about this movie other than it sucked royally. I don't normally use such mediocre words to describe a movie but nothing else could come to mind. The acting was bad, the script was bad, the story was bad, the gore was disgusting (but still bad), and the cannibals take the cake as being the worst looking I have ever seen. It looks like a bunch of French guys got together and decided to put on make up and pretend to be cannibals... wait a second!

Anyway, the story is about 3 crooks who kidnap a little girl and demand a ransom. When the heist fall apart they escape out to the jungle (which looks like a forest) and take refuge with a Spanish couple. When one of the crooks rapes the Spanish wife, the husband leads the crooks to the cannibals and now there is Hell to pay... yeah, right.

I can't help my sarcasm with this movie. It was just dreadful. I read other reviews that say something about Jess Franco having something to do with this movie. Man, if that's true he must have come to a real low point in his career.

This movie is strictly for people that have to see all of the cannibal films. If you aren't into that sort of thing, stay far FAR away from this train wreck. Even I who love the genre struggled to sit through this. 2/10

I generally like movies that depict anything that is "non mainstream". And I even don't mind gross movies if they are done well.

But this movie is a huge disappointment - no real story, no building up any character or situation, extremely bad acting (a school play does far better), the shots were pathetic, the gross scenes were not necessary (nor were they shocking).

The close up in scenes is really bad, i think i even spotted a 'cannibal' with long stylish locks! Looks like the directors/producers paid no attention to the movie at all !

With this movie, I've decided to stop watching any more "cannibal" genre movie!