Polyester

This must be one of the worst efforts in moviemaking I have ever seen, and also one of the funniest.

The story of Francine Fishpaw (played by transvestite Divine), the good Christian "wife" of a porntheater owner and how she became an alcoholic is told in such a bad and tasteless way that it became funny to watch. It really made me think of movies made by Ed Wood: so incredibly bad that they must become cult-classics. The timing in the movie amounts to nothing. There is no dicernable structure to be seen for miles around. The plottwists are too ludicrous for words. But it was all made with a lot of love and that is something that counts.

The sets on the other hand have been crafted in such a perfect obnoxious American suburban way that they made me shiver. The same thing counts for the costume design, absolutely fantastically horrible, all that Polyester.

At least John Waters in consistent in one aspect of the film: everybody is a lousy actor. There is absolutely nobody in this cast that can even remotely put on a decent performance. Edith Massey in particular is absolutely too horrible to watch. If only Joaquin Phoenix were old enough at the time, he would have played the role of Dexter Fishpaw to perfection, but he would have been too good for this cast.

The is the perfect exhibition of obnoxiousness and a great satire of American moral values.

7/10

I remember seeing this the night it came out (God, was it really 22 years ago!). We all went down to a late night showing at the Cedar on the West Bank in Mpls., with about 4 hours worth of "feelgood" in us.

I was familiar with Waters' work, having seen PINK FLAMINGOS, and was ready for the "Odorama" cards handed out when you bought your ticket, but my "associates" were a bit mystified. It all led up to a very different & unique experience, which really hasn't been equaled since.

Basically, there were about 10 (numbered 1-10) scratch-n-sniff scents which were to be activated by you from the card when a flashing number appeared on the screen. They included a rotten egg smell for flatulence (somebody broke wind in the movie), along with a natural gas smell when a character stuck their head in an oven, among others. You get the idea. Anyway, it had the usual John Waters' cast of characters (Mink, Edith, Divine, etc.), along with the late, great Stiv Bators making his big-screen debut as (what else), a delinquent. Stiv pulls it off quite well, and everything else pretty much amounted to a fun show-going experience.

Not nearly as shocking as FLAMINGOS or FEMALE TROUBLE, but surely rent it if your into that sort of thing (a/k/a the pre-HAIRSPRAY Waters). I'm sure those "Odorama" cards are long gone, so you'll have to get creative on your own to replicate the experience that was "Odorama".

This was my first John Waters movie, and it opened with scratch and sniff cards. Each "spot" had a color and number and when the appropriate scene arrived we had the privilege of smelling what was on screen. Divine's character had an odor fetish and was constantly spraying air freshener, while a nefarious plot was instigated to drive her insane by planting offensively smelly things like gym sox, dead fish etc for her to find at home.

Her husband runs an adult cinema. Her son, based on the Baltimore Stomper, a true character, sniffs industrial solvents, stalks women with cute shoes and feet, and then stomps on them with his combat boots. The daughter, obviously the model for Christine Applegate's character in Married With Children, is the high school slut that dances on tables for quarters. And Mom worries about fresh scents.

With these subplots to the main plot, it should be obvious that plot resolution and character development are not the main attractions in a John Waters movie. The caricature of society and its stereotypes is his game, and the best moment of the movie has to be when the TV news camera is in the face of one of the Baltimore Stomper's victims as she is being carried to the ambulance on a strecher. The victim's on camera stream of obscene invectives against the callous media was one of the great moments of the movie because it was such a refreshing expression of the common person's real disgust and frustration with tabloid evening news and a culture that trivializes human suffering. Juxtapose a broken instep with the main character's insufferable pain of finding a smelly sock and you have the theme of this movie. Even the fairytale resolutions to the problems are a hilarious sendup of 80's America.

If you want to see what makes John Waters such a cult hero, but would find Female Trouble or Pink Flamingos too offensive, this was his first attempt to bridge the gap to the more accessible films he made later, while still having enough of the gross-out quality for a good laugh riot.

(Serial Mom will be on TV the weekend after Veteran's Day, and it is another very accessible glimpse into the mind of Mr. Waters.)

This movie had me laughing my rear off when I first saw it. I have never been a major John Waters fan. His early stuff was more grotesque than funny in my somewhat less than humble opinion. This film is delightfully offensive and hilarious. It's sort of in the 'Animal House' league of humor. Which is a nice change of pace from Waters earlier flicks.

If John Waters did nothing else in his career he created the fabulous screen team of Divine and Tab Hunter. Back in the day when he was one of Henry Willson's chiseled clients he was linked often on and off screen with Natalie Wood. Personally I think he works much better with Divine.

Polyester and it seemed everyone was wearing the fabric in 1981 in some manner is a wonderful satire on the American scene. Like Married With Children the Fishpaws are your typical American family seen with a jaundiced eye. But the Fishpaws make the Bundys look like the Cleavers.

Our leading character is Divine all 300 pounds of her who has let herself go to seed married to this bum of a husband David Samson who is getting on with his secretary. Divine is a good Christian woman who lives the middle class life due to Samson's income from a drive- in he owns where porn rules.

Her daughter Mary Garlington is the Kelly Bundy of the 80s. And her son Ken King has issues that make Bud Bundy look like the All American kid. He's not called the Baltimore Stomper for nothing.

In the end she gets shed of Samson and meets her dream man, Tab Hunter. But that's only the beginning.

Divine created some very funny characters for John Waters in her life. But they had a touch of pathos and sadness as well. This was her great strength as a performer.

Waters serves up some real funny stuff in Polyester. It's positively Divine.