Le Justicier de New York

I'm having a lot of trouble trying to figure out how to rate this movie. As an actual film, it can't honestly score more than one star out of five. As pure cheese however, you'd have to give this movie a straight up five out of five.

This is probably one of the worst movies I have ever seen. The catch is, it's so bad that it's actually good. Make sense? The movie is infinitely rewatchable and you can always find something new to laugh at every time you pop this sucker in the player. There is very little to tell you about this movie other than if you haven't seen it, you need to. It's unbelievably violent and Ol' Chuck mows down at least a hundred gang members throughout the film's ninety minutes.

I can write an entire dissertation on this film but I've already seen it done on the Web on quite a few sites so I'm not going to bother. Just to remind you, the movie is so bad and unintentionally funny (watching the film again, it'd make sense if the filmmakers were going for laughs) that if you haven't seen it, you need to.

I'll leave you to ponder this one scene and decide for yourselves whether or not this movie is for you or not: Gang bikers come down the street. Angry civilians wait with a chain stretched across the road. Bikers come and are clotheslined off of their bikes when the chain is yanked upwards. While the bikers are on the floor, the civilians come out and shoot all of them, point blank while they lay writhing on the floor. Men, women and oh yes, children come out and join in the festivities, dancing around the dead bodies of the bikers.

Sigh. Instant classic.

RATING: * out of *****.

SHLOCK-O-CHEESE RATING: ***** out of *****.

There are few movies out there that can honestly be called classics, Deathwish 3 is one. I must have watched this movie dozens of times, yet each time it is just as ridiculously funny. From the outset the movie explodes with laughs. Kersey's trip to jail, where he is threatened by some thug, who apparently high on goof balls, decides to attack the most giant guy in the jail for no reason and is bloodily beaten down. At this point he turns back to Kersey and curses him like it is his fault! Make no sense? Don't let that stop you, there is more where that came from. Next the police inspector beating Kersey up, then abruptly out of nowhere saying, `you see, I'm a big fan of yours'! . There are so many other hilarious plot inconsistencies. Mr.Kaprov saying `Mr.Kersey, it's 90 degrees outside!' as he is wearing a full shirt and thick sweater! Or Kersey's friend Charlie, who somehow managed to smuggle back two massive machine guns from Korea. Did he take that in his carryon luggage on the trip back? Add to all this lame romance that Kersey and the public defender have and you have the making of a masterpiece. For whatever reason, the desperate woman wants a date with Kersey. The romance that ensues is epic, until unfortunately, like all women that Kersey dates, she is horribly killed. The final piece of the puzzle is some of the best one liners in any movie. Some include, `it's your wife, she is sick or... something' Fraker, `bulletproof just like yours asshole' Fraker, `they call him the giggler, he laughs when he runs' Bennet, "I'll kill a little old lady for you. Catch it on the 6 o'clock news!" Fraker. I could go on and on. You owe it to yourself to rent this extraordinary film. Truly one of the greatest ever made!

Most critics seem to have dismissed this film, like so many other Charles Bronson vehicles, as just another patchwork of mindless violence. And while there is a fair amount of mayhem, DEATH WISH 3 is not that awful of an effort, particularly for fans of the series and its star.

This time out, aging Charlie's Paul Kersey is let loose by a police chief desperate to clean up a rough part of New York City. The trigger-happy vigilante moves into the heart of gang territory, where he once again becomes a one-man army in an urban war of good versus evil. Bronson, at least the "older" version, is truly at his best.

I'm not saying DEATH WISH 3 is a classic. Indeed to the discriminating eye it has a plethora of imperfections. The characters are generally made of cardboard. The violence is over the top. A man well into his 60s outruns and outspooks dozens of young punks. But in the tradition of the original DEATH WISH and later films such as FALLING DOWN with Michael Douglas, it has a definite crowd-pleasing charm. Who doesn't want to see gangbangers get their due? There are also some great cheesy moments and one-liners so common in 1980s films. When a tenant of his apartment building sees Kersey setting up a booby trap, for instance, the vigilante lightheartedly says he's "thinning the herd." A line only Bronson can truly make work.

So you see, the key to enjoying DEATH WISH 3 is to accept it for what it is. It ain't Spielberg and it ain't art. So throw the popcorn in the microwave and have fun with it.

Paul Kersey(Charles Bronson) turns into a one man army when Fraker terrorizes the old people who can't afford to move out, seems these punks need a lesson in manners and Bronson is there to deliver it. Whether it's by using a board to smash anyone who opens the window, putting a bed of nails by the window to prevent someone from setting foot in his house or using big game pistol gunfire to keep giggling thieves at bay, Bronson is determined to give these punks a lesson in etiquette. Back in the 80's no film was half as cool as a movie with an action star and a giant body count. Death Wish 3 was no exception and while I loved the movie as a teenager, it's only fitting that I bought the DVD and love it even more today. Cannon films were awesome back in the day, they made terrible movies, sure, but more often then not it was campy bad movie fun, not unlike this one. Indeed where as you can only watch a good movie once, you can watch this one ten times and never grow tired of it. I could watch this over and over again and I may just pick up another DVD just in case I ware it out. I think that speaks for itself.

* *1/2 out of 4-(Pretty good)

Thus continues Paul Kersey's journey through lands densely populated with criminals...

In this installment, yet another of Paul's friends dies at the hands of thugs. But Paul's not going to stand for it-- he'll take the law into his own hands! Again! Naturally, the dark spectre of crime follows him like a bad penny. In a single afternoon he witnesses more felonies than most of us will see in a lifetime.

Paul's new neighborhood is a checkerboard of cinder-blocked windows, bodegas, flophouses and piles of rubble. His slum is populated by various law-abiding ethnic types being tormented by a motley gang of knuckleheads who aren't willing to let Paul take control of their turf. Some of the ne'er do wells have a funny logo painted on their foreheads. By day and night they rape, pillage, murder and invade the homes of innocents.

Yet -- paradoxically -- the area remains bustling with civilized activity. In the face of danger, its citizens brazenly (or ignorantly) go about their lives. But there is a stiff penalty to pay for such defiance and only the swift arm of Paul Kersey can put it right, all the while inventing new ways to extract teeth from would-be burglars.

Classic formulaic film-making from Cannon films!

6/10