Patrouille de nuit

This film does a superior job of balancing its exceptionally crude humor against the setting of occupational narrative of a police officer moonlighting as the Unknown Comic (bag over head), just as the protagonist does a superlative job balancing both careers. While criticized as appealing to a adolescent sense of humor, Night Patrol is entirely worthwhile for all ages, so long as they have a vulgar and adolescent level of maturity. The fact that the humor is very coarse and the laughs cheap does nothing at all to detract from the intensity of that laughter or the sense of fulfillment that it engenders. Night Patrol has been too long out of print and deserves a reissue.

Night Patrol (1984)

** (out of 4)

If you thought POLICE ACADEMY was immature then you haven't seen nothing until you watch this clone. The actual story here is pretty light as a dimwitted police officer (Murray Langston) has to work the night patrol while at the same time playing The Unknown Comic and trying to get his act off the ground. That's pretty much the only story here as we're basically just given raunchy and politically incorrect scenes that are sometimes funny but more times than not just downright stupid. I say downright stupid and that's not necessarily a bad thing because it really does seem like the writers of this thing just sat around trying to think of the worst jokes they could tell and put them in the movie. So many of these jokes are just so bad and so lame yet you still laugh simply because of how bad they are. Why is public hair curly? Wait until you hear the punchline. The entire film has humor that you're only going to find in an 80's movie and this includes a lot of jokes towards gay people and there's even a rape victim sequence, which is just downright weird to say the least and especially once you see who the actual victim is. So, is NIGHT PATROL any good? I really wouldn't call it good but I think it's campy enough to where you should be able to enjoy it. Langston is decent in the lead role and we've got Linda Blair in support as well as Pat Paulsen and Billy Barty. Fans of 80's humor will certainly want to watch this at least once but you've low-level of humor will determine how much you actually enjoy it.

Being a devoted and unconditional Linda Blair fanboy puts you through watching a whole lot of crazy and abominably awful stuff. I learned that via guilty pleasures like "Night Force", "Witchcraft", "Fatal Bond", and now I can add "Night Patrol" to the list as well. How, in Pazuzu's name, did you end up here Linda?

As far as slapstick/24 jokes-per-minute parodies go, there's a mighty good reason why "Night Patrol" isn't appearing in the same lists as films like "Airplane!", "The Naked Gun", "Top Secret", or "Hot Shots!". It simply is not as funny as those. That is not an issue, and you honestly can't expect from director Jackie Kong to be as skilled and gifted as the ZAZ-trio. "Night Patrol" can best be considered as a naughtier, schlockier, and politically incorrect R-rated version of "Police Academy". The script makes fun of every minority group, ethnicity, sexual orientation, or physical disability imaginable, and even traumatizing events like rape are shamelessly mocked.

The biggest risk with these rapid-fire comedies is that many jokes become misfires. "Night Patrol" scores quite bad in this department. For every ingenious and genuinely funny moment, there are approximately 10-12 downright embarrassing jokes. And yet, even the painfully unfunny gags (including every scene with Andrew Dice Clay) didn't bother me much, because this is basically nothing more than harmless and infantile comedy you cannot get offended by. The only thing I regret is that I didn't watch "Night Patrol" when I was 11 years old, as it features everything I wanted to see back then (like boobs, toilet humor, ...)

This is a schlock masterpiece, and a truly funny film. It is stupid, tasteless, and perverted, and funny as hell. I like this BETTER than Police Acadamy and many of those 80's cop films like that. Sure, it is raunchy and dumb but it is all in good fun. This also has one of the greatest restaurant jokes I have ever seen...the refill gag. If you don't know what I am talking about see this film. A scene that is also hilarious is a scene when random people on the street suddenly break out and sing. Also, the unknown comic is a real laugh...his jokes are not funny, which is why it makes it so funny! Make any sense? The movie is basically about another unknown comic who is ruining the unknown comic's reputation for an unknown reason! And the worst cops ever are sent to bring justice to this Unknown Comic. These cops make Police Academy look good! See this film if you are a fan of schlock, if not, stayyy awayyy...

I rented this movie more than 10 years ago when I was in my very early teens. It's loaded with juvenile sex, gas and lesbian jokes. It also had so much gratuitous nudity that I often watched it for no other reason than to stare at the bodacious breasts. I LOVED IT!! Too bad I decided to give it another viewing a few years back. JEEZ was I a stupid kid. In fact, I couldn't even sit through it again and the below review is from my childhood memory of this disaster caught on celluloid. Remarkable, how age completely alters perception.

Not that it matters, but the plot (if you could call it that) involves a stupid masked ('Unknown') comic running around robbing convenience stores, subjecting his victims and the audience to a barrage of horrible jokes. For reasons that become clear at the movie's 'twist ending', a certain police officer becomes interested in catching the masked madman. Into this mess, throw Pat Morita as a girl-voiced sex-crime victim forced to abuse himself repeatedly to amuse a gang of lesbians, women repeatedly coming under a bizarre spell causing them to spontaneously remove their shirts, Bill Barty walking around releasing enough gas to inflate the Hindenberg and 'The Unknown Comic' gaining enormous popularity, despite telling worse jokes than Jackie Martling.

A lot of nonsense happens, all supposedly related to the police investigation of the masked thief's crime spree. It all comes together in the end when we learn the 'Unknown Comic's' true identity and the leads fall in love and have sex (giving us a glimpse of Linda Blaire's ample bosom).

Still interested? Then keep in mind that this movie is shot in such an amateurish manner, you'll swear the cinematographer was either blind, or couldn't bare to watch what he was filming. Further, the dialogue is so inane, you'll be scrambling for a knife to cut your ears off.

In the end? Avoid at all costs, unless you are 12. However, if you want your girlfriend to leave you, I suggest you rent this movie, tell her you saw it just before you met her and you know she'll love it.