Inseminoïd

Shot on a rather low budget, Inseminoid aka Horror Planet is still more entertaining than many sci-fi shows and movies mass produced these days - this little production rides a little on the wave of Alien and mixes elements of horror and sci-fi adventure. For sure this is not a masterpiece, but if you are in the mood for some cheesy 80s B-movie of the sub genre of horror sci-fi, this one will provide some entertaining (and silly fun) moments indeed. This one is recommended if you dig B-movies like Lifeforce, Galaxy of Terror, Forbidden World, Planet of the Vampires, Species and Virus also comes to mind.

Male and female scientists set up a research lab on a distant planet and encounter a giant, bug-eyed alien monster. It kills several people, rapes Judy Geeson and disappears, but the horrors are just beginning. Geeson becomes a hard-to-kill, hysterical madwoman with super strength who kills for blood to feed the alien's mutant offspring, which she's now carrying.

This Brit ALIEN clone is often inept and entirely contrived, but not completely without entertainment value. FX are mediocre, but it's bloody, fast-paced and there's a great electric score from John Scott. Judy Geeson is excellent in a role that requires a hell of a lot of merciless ranting and screaming.

HORROR PLANET refers to the original U.S. release of the film, which was cut. The title INSEMINOID refers to the uncut, letterboxed DVD and cable version.

Score: 3 out of 10

This movie is, first and foremost, a rip-off of Alien. Pretty easy to see that right off. The budget is terrible, the acting is terrible, the writing is terrible, the direction is terrible and the music is terrible. This movie is terrible. Not just a little terrible but unbelievably terrible, in the stratosphere terrible. And thats why its so fascinating. Scene after scene, I was absolutely fascinated that a movie could be so terrible and yet it seemed to top itself. Just when I thought it couldnt get any worse, it did. I was entranced by this fact. I could not stop watching it for that reason. I watched Alien on DVD recently and I couldnt help but think of Horror Planet. Alien is so amazingly competent in every way that it is insulting to have to make any comparisons between the two. My advice is to rent Horror Planet and watch it. Watch every scene. Its not a long movie and never really boring, again not for the right reasons. Then, preferably on DVD or VHS widescreen, watch Alien. You will come away feeling such gratitude to Ridley Scott, the actors and producers of Alien that its worth the trouble of watching Horror Planet. Then, never ever ever EVER watch Horror Planet again, but keep re-discovering Alien. It is one of the greatest movies ever made.

The script is the main culprit, with terrible lines and cliché scenes written for 4 year old to ponder upon: The number of times the cast members are sent out into the corridor (ones & twos) to be done-in by a rabid Ms Gleeson beggars belief! And each time they fall over\ stand still so as to allow themselves to be dispatched in some very poorly choreographed fight scene- did I say fight scene? I meant rolling around on the ground. I can only guess that they ran out of plot devices on day 1.

The Director should also stand up and take a bow, as a lot of the fault lies there. The subject matter may have been "maverick" but it was executed in a terrible way- B movie slasher style. He should have realised that this plot line was about as believable as politician election promise.

My sympathy goes to the cast, who were made to say the lines and roll around on the ground. They put in bad performances all round, with only Ms Gleeson showing an occasional dabble of acting skill.

If MST3K ever wanted to do a schlock SF horror, this would be the one to go for.

The title caught our attention in the same way as Revenge of The Space-Hitlers, it's a title that says "this could be so bad that it would be entertaining". This is what we found. Low production values, low production costs, bad acting, bad dialogue, bad special effects - we found it hilarious (unlike Boggy Creek II, which was just plain awful)

After the prologue, the opening line is "Hey wait a minute!" as in "what's this strange thing I've found on this strange alien world" - get the idea? It's a classic demonic possession plot, where a nice girl is turned nasty by an alien intelligence, and then people get 'hurt'. This means that there is plenty of blood and pain, and some cracking screaming from Geeson. If Oscars were awarded for screaming, we're of the opinion she should have got a nomination at the very least.

To exemplify the bad dialogue: Woman in peril: "I can't do it!". Man trying to save woman with motivational words: "Can't is a word I don't understand! Come on, you can't give up!"

Also "Unknown energy fields are beyond the reach of this team."

Overall I'd describe this as a poor vehicle for nasty, bloody violence and a bit of sex, which made little sense. However, there is much entertainment in it's dire naffness.