Femmes en cage

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There's a scene in Barbed Wire Dolls that is so perfectly horrible it should be cinematic legend. It's a young girl's flashback of her father (played by Franco himself) attempting to rape her. The entire scene is shot with Franco's patented wandering zoom, a lens slathered with vaseline and a slow motion effect you have to see to believe.

Doing double-duty as "Cinematographer," Franco apparently didn't realize you could change the frame rate on the camera and decided slow motion is best acquired through slow motion acting. Yup, actors pretending to go through the motions in real time slow motion. Hilarious.

For someone who hates his own movies and wishes he'd directed Citizen Kane, Franco's taste is not nearly as bad as the choices he consistently makes behind the camera. Within the realm of bad movies, if Ed Wood Jr. is Orson Welles, then Jess Franco is quite possibly John Ford. High praise, indeed. Barbed Wire Dolls is a B- movie with so many juicy tidbits of ineptness, tasteless raunch, camp and cliché you can't help but love this senseless mess. See the slow motion genius for yourself:

Barbed Wire Dolls (1975)

*** 1/2 (out of 4)

A young woman (Lina Romay) is sent to prison after accidentally killing her father (Franco himself) who was trying to rape her. Inside the prison she must deal with an evil warden (Monica Swinn), a mixed up doctor (Paul Muller) and all sorts of sexually hungry lesbians. As far as WIP (Women in Prison) films go then this is without question the best one I've seen as it has no limits to the amount of trash it will go to whether it be violence, torture, nudity or sexual abuse. The film never takes itself overly serious and instead is just a good time if you can stand this type of thing. Romay has the perfect look for the good girl and really delivers on that level. Her sexuality certainly shine through as does the rest of the girls. I've said quite often that no one knows how to film women better than Franco and his camera is constantly looking over all the beautiful women and picking up everything he can. Swinn is also in good form as the lesbian warden who love to torture and rape. Franco keeps the action moving through the rather short 80-minute running time, which is a great thing as the film never slows down or gets boring. All of the women makes for good characters to root for and all he bad guys are great villains including the Governor who gets his kick watching his assistant do the women. The highlight of the film however belongs to a flashback sequence where we see Romay kill her father being played by Franco. This scene, shot in slow motion, is just so incredibly silly that you can't help but laugh out loud.

A sick mind, or a million dollars . . . Which is better? Currently I only have the sick mind: and this movie feeds that fairly well! The version I saw was 81 minutes instead of the 90 minute full length film: but still, I would have to inform you to NOT use the comment from, Quebec, Canada. Because, the lack of 9 minutes probably would not have deleted scenes of any loot from a robbery, or some insurance whatever, or information about a woman in prison for killing her lover: none of those statements was correct from what I saw. There was a prisoner who killed her father, and one who killed her brother. But . . . You'll have to watch to find out what really took place about one of those killings. And let me tell you about the female warden, Monica Swinn; she may not have been as sexy as Brigitte Nielsen's portrayal of a warden, but Monica still had appeal, and did very well with being a mean bitch. The eyepiece she wears is a good touch, too, along with the Nazi book she reads. And though her voice was dubbed, that voice was well chosen. The warden loves seeing nude prisoners get mistreated; and when you see the nudity, you're seeing a film much better then your average soft-core movie. You will also see a great looking old prison; or it's a castle by the sea? And finally, you'll see the jungle area between the prison and the sea where an escape takes place. But . . . the ending is not your typical Hollywood bullsh*t.

Well, I didn't go into this film expecting anything over and above the usual sleaze from prolific director Jess Franco, and while I've certainly seen worse films from the director; this isn't exactly a highlight for him either. Barbed Wire Dolls is another one of those sleazy 'women in prison' in films, and aside from the obvious implications of this sort of film; Franco has seen fit to make things even sleazier by way of things such as a lesbian warden and a whole host of sadistic torture sequences. There's basically no plot in this film, although there is a little slither involving a young woman and her father, whom she is believed to have murdered. This plot never takes centre focus, however, and Franco seems keener to continually show filth, which is no bad thing if you ask me. However, there's only really so far a film like this can go with no plot to speak of, and the fact that Franco didn't care at all about telling a story is shown best at the end, when it just 'ends' without any resolution. Still, sleaze fans are likely to get a lot out of this film as there's naked chicks, violence, lesbians, sadism etc, and while I don't rate this too highly; I can at least say I enjoyed watching it. What?

Well, you can't openly declare that you like (or even enjoy) watching this type of movies because then – let's face it – you automatically get a stamp on your head that says 'potential threat to society'. Barbed Wire Dolls is a non-stop series of sex and violence that explicitly focuses on female nudity and sexual torture. The more reasonable reason to be interested in this film is the man who made it. Jesus Franco, the undeniable Godfather of sleaze takes on the ultra-controversial subject of 'Babes behind Bars' here. Franco is a remarkable director to say the least, with over 180 films on his repertoire as a director. Although this 'Barbed Wire Dolls' doesn't come close to his best achievements, it sure is memorable. But not exactly for the right reasons… The plot is thin to non-existent, it lacks range and feeling and there's no tension to detect. Even the typical exploitation-music (a must for films like this) is absent. Compared to what you might think, it isn't even THAT gross or nauseating. The film doesn't feature sequences of extreme bloodshed or severe mutilation. Instead, Barbed Wire Dolls only serves a lot of naked female beauty and absurd characters. We have the lesbian guard with obvious Nazi-tics, insane prisoners and fraudulent authority-figures. Oh, and let's not forget the falsely accused heroine and the remorseful male guard. Actually, Barbed Wire Dolls looked ideal to supply with a neutral rating. Like 4 or 5 out of 10…but then it got entirely spoiled by the abrupt and idiotic ending. Really, it looks like Franco all of a sudden got tired of it and just said: 'That's a wrap'. Maybe he had to hurry to another set…your agenda is pretty much filled with 180 movies to direct.