The Teacher

"The Teacher" has been sitting in my film collection for several years now, as part of the "Drive-In Cult Classics" box, but I was never in a particular hurry to see it. That is until I watched a joyous 80s flick named "They're Playing with Fire" a couple of days ago and learned that it was a remake of this film, and by the same director Howard Avedis. Since the 80s version was so much fun, and simply because I don't like the idea of having seen a remake but not the original, "The Teacher" received some priority.

For the record, though, they are quite different movies. Both do indeed revolve around an incredibly hot female teacher in her late twenties seducing one her clueless senior year students, but that's where the similarity ends. "They're Playing with Fire" has a convoluted plot in which the teacher has a sneaky reason to manipulate her boy-toy, and there's a psychotic killer roaming around. "The Teacher" is much simpler since there's only one pervy stalker. Certain sequences are identical, though, like when the confident teachers ask their shy young lovers to kiss them for the first time. And, it must be underlined, writer/director Avedis has a great talent for casting the ideal cougar-teachers! Angel "my-first-name-is-accurate" Thompson was one of the finest exploitation starlets of the 70s, and Sybil Danning is the ultimate queen of the 80s.

Thompson is also the only real reason to recommend "The Teacher" to fans of exploitation cinema. The story is rather tame, and the amount of action is minimal, hence the highlights include - shallow as it may be - Angel sunbathing topless on a boat, or Angel undressing for the nervous kid. I kept waiting for a twist about why the beautiful woman messes around with her student's feelings, but apparently the script wants us to believe she's genuinely in love with him. That's not exactly ethical of you, Mrs. Marshall, but okay. The sub plots of the accidental death of Sean's friend and the crazy stalker lead nowhere. Apart from staring viciously and popping out of nowhere, Anthony James doesn't have much to do. Let's file this under "watchable but unmemorable".

One of the handful of pictures made by Hikmet Avedis, a classifiable low-budget director of not-quite schlock and drive-in flicks, The Teacher is ostensibly about a 28 year old teacher (lovely Angel Tompkins)- the hottie of the town without a husband as he's a drifter/biker somewheres- who bonds with the shy 18 year old former student neighbor (1/2 dimensional Jay North) and start up a passionate affair. This part of the story is basically more or less just a Penthouse letter extended to feature length (and, oddly enough for a drive-in flick, the amount of sex is actually shown to a minimum, above the belt as it were). What makes it just a little bit more interesting, if also insane, is the character Ralph (crazy-eyed Anthony James), who comes off like a 2nd string James Bond villain missing a couple of acting classes.

He's weird and a snoop, with an obsession with Diane holding a torch for her unofficially while also trying to hunt down Sean after the death of his younger brother. It seems stranger still why Ralph would be so distraught over his brother's death when all Ralph seems to do is sit in his warehouse by the harbor, take out a pair of binoculars from his coffin (which comes out of the mysterious hearse he drives around) which also has a rifle. But he's a villain nonetheless, creeping up at pretty much any instance Sean and Diane are out, or even while they're on her boat making love as he creeps up like a Z-grade Aquaman.

If nothing else his ridiculous performance of an even sillier, deranged cat makes it watchable, when all else is just kind of mundane romance (North especially can barely act his way out of a paper bag, at least Tompkins has her sex appeal). It's nothing very special, or memorable, but if the title ever came up in conversation it would be fun to wax poetic about Anthony James as Ralph, or to contemplate the ways it could make a decent self-made MST3K feature.

I first saw "The Teacher" at a drive-in. I have owned it on VHS video and have ordered it on DVD. It is one of my all-time favorites and I guess, a guilty pleasure. I agree that Angel Tompkins carries the film and that Jay ("Dennis The Menace") North was a strange and rather ironic choice for her co-star. I don't recall any scene where they have sex on a rooftop in the rain, as someone else has previously commented and I have seen the film quite a few times. It is a breezy and enjoyable film, despite the strange, unexpected, out-of-place and unnecessary subplot about a psychotic admirer of Angel Tompkins character and an unexpected finale.

"The Teacher" is every teenage boy's fantasy come true!! I have previously owned it on VHS video and currently await receipt of the film on DVD. I found the casting of 1950's tv child star Jay North (Dennis The Menace) to be a real surprise. It was however, a bigger surprise to see how his acting career had managed to continue up to this time, since he had certainly outgrown the effectiveness he had displayed as a troublesome small boy!! Angel Tompkins is competent and believable in the title role. The only thing that stretches believability is that a stunning and intelligent woman like her would be interested in a teenage boy!! Not to mention that she would be willing to risk her career and reputation!! The subplot involving a psychotic admirer of the teacher, played by Anthony James, seems out of place and drags down the film's breeziness somewhat. Most every teenage boy has probably admired an older woman, not unlikely a teacher, but more likely than not, few have ever had the opportunity to become involved with one!! The film touches on this quite realistically, but ultimately, the wrap-up is disappointing, unexpected and abrupt. In reality, most older women would find most teenage boys too immature for them and wouldn't give them the time of day. This film takes exception to that. Amazingly enough, "The Teacher" was sort of re-made in 1984, by the same director, as "They're Playing With Fire". It starred Sybil Danning and Eric "Private Lessons" Brown. In my opinion, it was even more unbelievable and unrealistic and at least as far as I am concerned, far inferior. I can certainly recommend "The Teacher" to every man who, as a teenager, ever admired an older woman, even a teacher!!

Former "Dennis the Menace" star Jay North and WIP-vet Angel Tompkins star in this ridiculous story of an affair between a student and a "teacher" (funny, we never see her actually teaching anything). Tompkins clocks some obligatory nude scenes, but anyone expecting a softcore sex romp is going to be pretty disappointed--this movie has an actual (if completely deranged) plot where both characters are being stalked by a crazed Vietnam vet who's obsessed with the teacher and blames the kid for the death of his younger brother (don't ask). Any entertainment value is purely unintentional, however. The kid's parents are especially hilarious. The mother foists her son on this "older woman", saying things like:"I know he's my son, but I find Sean very attractive." His father on the other hand is totally alarmed that his boy might be making the beast with two backs with a sexy, 28-year-old woman (every father's worst nightmare I'm sure). It all ends completely preposterously. This is evidently supposed to be a tragic drama, but I would recommend it as a so-bad-it's-good comedy were it not for the very slow final act and the wretched, vomit-inducing theme song. OK, but not great.