Invasion from Inner Earth

As a fan of "schlock" sci-fi, I was pleasantly surprised by this movie. I own a copy of "Plan 9 from outer space" and love to trot it out and "inflict" it on unsuspecting friends. It's a MST3K moment. This movie surpasses Ed Wood's classic by far.

The dialogue is so wooden and the "action" is so contrived that it is a joy to endure. A fan of "Kentucky Fried Movie" and it's ilk, I found this "movie" to be a joy - albeit a painful one. The acting is so terrible and the script so wrong, all the makings of a new "Plan 9".

I recommend this movie, watch it and get infected from its "wrongness", really, this movie is so bad, its great.

The "hero" of the story brings to mind the lumberjack in the Monty Python skit "The Lumberjack" and the "sister" - well, she is just plain clueless.

I should have realised as the title music was a sort of electronic version of something Ennio Morricone left on the studio floor that I was in for a treat... This is dreadful. A group of young folks find themselves stranded in the Canadian wilderness as technology around them is breaking down. It appears that we are amidst an invasion - but of where, by whom - and why? Don't expect any answers to these and any other questions in this shockingly over-long, badly lit and directed piece of nonsense. The score is frequently outperformed by the sound of static on the radios and the acting (and dancing!) - well, think little Toby's Christmas nativity when he was 8. It didn't help that the version I saw recently was terribly over-exposed (perhaps a dodgy NTSC conversion) but by the middle, the invasion couldn't come fast enough - never mind by the end.

The premise for this movie was interesting enough, and there are some very developed characters in it like the TV talk show host, and his two guests. Unfortunately they only have about five minutes of footage. The main characters are believable and the acting competent. So what went wrong? It's almost as if they started making this movie on an interesting idea, but quickly realized that they had no idea where it was going, because by the time the movie concludes, you feel like you were played for a fool, and wished you never wasted your time. It seems like they made up the plot as they were making the movie. I know it requires a certain amount of cognitive dissonance to watch a movie like this, but this one is so awful you can't even enjoy how lousy it is. Here are a group of people in a winter wilderness with nothing but a ham radio to communicate with the outside world, but they start having a debate about what is going on by reading newspaper articles? What the....? Where are they getting this information about a situation that just started?, and in such an isolated place? By the end, if you don't get disgusted enough to just shut it off before then, it has to be one of the most idiotic movie endings you will ever see. It's like it is for some other totally different movie. I won't disclose it, but believe me, you will want to throw the DVD in the trash.

I saw this movie under the title "They" as part of the Nightmare Worlds 50 DVD collection released by Mill Creek. Easily one of the best sci-fi flicks filmed in Wisconsin circa 1970's I've seen this year, mostly because of the mention of Rhinelander, Wisconsin. I admit I was a little let down by the fact there wasn't a single Hodag (Do a Google search if need be) to be found.

Still, killer smoke bombs are without a doubt the most original villains ever. The film is only mostly terribly acted or over acted if you're a bearded cast member in this film and the snow mobile scenes are gratuitous if not plentiful. The scenery is white, the bad guys are red, and everyone owns a checkered flannel shirt.

OK, This is a painfully bad film, the soundtrack is off the wall, the actors are only actors in the sense that they are in the act of doing things in the snow that are (maybe accidentally)captured on film, and the special effects consist of smoke bombs and flashlights with red cellophane covering the lens. For me to sum this movie up in one word, it would be, AWESOME

Lovers of these types of films (Le Bad Cinema), like myself, will find this flick both charming and indispensable. If you got enjoyment out of such fine films as They Saved Hitlers Brain, Mano's or Curse of the Headless Horseman. You will love this...errr "They".

Apparently, after a worldwide search for the perfect script writer, director Bill Rebane happened upon a little known writer named Barbara J. Rebane to pen his vision. Where he discovered her is unknown to me, but the two of them created magic together.

She took two bold steps in this film, one original and one copied later with a much higher budget.

First, she broke the survivor-typecast protocol that most writers would dare not violate. Rather than give longevity to the handsome brooding Native American or the outdoorsy Canadian, she gives the nod to the chunky, bearded, bespectacled cretin in the Sherlock Holmes hat. Under normal circumstances, this type of character would be lighting his own gas in the corner of the room while the others formulate a plan and then meet with an untimely, yet slightly humorous death. Rebane, on the other hand, even gives this guy the girl.

The other place where she unwittingly deserves credit is for utilizing the aliens-under-the-ground scenario for a lot less money than Tom Cruise probably paid for his "War of the Worlds" travesty. I'd be curious to know whether she got a "based on an idea by" or an "inspired by" credit in Cruise's film.

PS - despite the fact that I consider these two areas worthy of compliment, I am in no way recommending anyone actually watch this movie.