SSSSnake, le cobra

What we have here is a failure to....OH, wrong Strother Martin film. Well, Martin is the star of Sssssss(7 s's), and I must admit he is rather enjoyable to watch as a kindly, softspoken, insane, murderous herpetologist trying to save the human race by turning men into cobras. The story is absurd and rather difficult to follow. The special effects suck(being blunt and candid) as we see Dirk Benedict get an occasional scale on his green body. The snakes are impressive, however. Martin's over-the-top performance saves this film from being utterly mundane and makes it fun to watch.

Ok, I've got to qualify that "Ssssssscary as Hell!!!" statement. I first saw this movie on TV when I was like 5 years old. My babysitter wanted to watch it, despite the fact that it scared me to death. In fact, this movie is the one defining moment in my life that made me forever ssssssscared ssssssspitless of sssssssnakes.

About a year or so ago, I saw the ad for this movie on the SciFi channel and it again made my blood run cold. But I decided to watch it anyway, finger on the remote switcher button, to see if it was really as I remembered it 25 years ago. Granted, the special effects were exceedingly lame and the acting was even worse, but remember, this was made back in the early 70's -- long before Industrial Light and Magic and when the only prerequisite for acting was big boobs and a tight butt. Regardless, this movie, in it's time, really was ssssssscary. So scary, that after watching it (at that young age), that I refused to get in a shower (I'd only take baths) until I was probably 12. Oh, and I did actually get through the whole movie on SciFi and actually developed feelings for the pet cobra that gets...well, something happens to it, but I'm not telling what for those who haven't seen it. After watching it recently, a little bit of that pent up fear was released -- although, I still can't stand snakes, not even to look at a picture of them in a book or anything -- except cobras, I really like cobras, now.

Oh, well. I recommend the movie. Just remember the time period it came out of and watch it for what it is. Granted, the story-line was a bit hokey, but just think what it could be like if they made a remake with really good special effects, really good horror movie actors, and a little bit of work on the script.

Ssssssso long!

A college student becomes lab assistant to a scientist who is working on a serum that can transform humans into snakes.

This film is far from perfect. It could use a few more horror or science fiction elements, perhaps. Where it excels is with the use of real snakes and the knowledge that the professor has. I am not a herpetologist, and would not claim to be any sort of snake expert. But when the professor is explaining different things about snakes, it sounds very real, like he really knows what he's doing. So, well done on the script.

The premise is a bit silly, but not overly so. This seems like the sort of thing that might be in a 1950s movie rather than a 1970s film from Universal. Director Bernard Kowalski (1929-2007), perhaps not surprisingly, is a veteran of such Roger Corman-produced films as "Night of the Blood Beast" and "Attack of the Giant Leeches". (Kowalski was director on both, but you can imagine that Corman had his fingers in the pie.)

Pretty silly horror movie about Dr. Carl Stoner (Strother Martin) who has perfected a drug that turns men into King Cobra snakes. (Yeah--I know it's ridiculous). WHY he wants to do this is never fully explained. He wants to use it on young David Blaine (Dirk Benedict)...but his daughter (Heather Menzies) is falling in love with him.

OK--the story is more than a little silly but this is fairly watchable. They used real snakes in the film (as a statement at the beginning tells us) and just watching them is pretty interesting. The story itself moves pretty quickly and (science aside) is pretty involving. The acting helps--Martin is actually not bad as the doctor; Benedict (so young and handsome) is also pretty good as Blaine and Menzies overdoes it a little (particularly in an argument with Martin) but she's not bad. There's also some fairly impressive (for the time) makeup and special effects. It's OK.

Trivia: Flashes of nudity (mostly from Menzies) are inexplicably "covered up" in the prints now in circulation. Strange--it was OK for a PG in 1973.

No snakes were harmed during the filming of this movie. The concept was interesting. A brilliant doctor has the formula to help mankind survive the event of the holocaust and other cataclysmic proportions. Think of this, a snake with the intelligence of a human. So the girlfriend of the human test subject, David, witnesses her boyfriend's demise in the freakish predicament of a snake, his precious life ends at the paws of mortality itself, the otherwise innocuous ferret, who, in this case, does not stop to think that the snake he is killing for his next meal might and could just be a human, which the very same species he depends on for his survival.

How could the so-called medical geniuses not have seen it all along, turning humans into snakes to endure the next holocaust? What are my hard earned tax dollars going toward if not funding for the study of human-snake transformation! Idiots!