HealtH

As an Altman fan, I'd sought out this movie for years, thinking that with such a great cast, it would have to be at least marginally brilliant.

Big mistake.

This is one of Altman's big-cast mishmashes, thrown together haphazardly and improvisationally (or so it feels) with the hope that it would all come together in the editing room. It doesn't.

As Maltin points out, this turkey is notable only for the debut performance of Alfre Woodard, who outshines the vets all around her. But other than that, avoid at all costs. (Which is pretty easy to do -- it's never been released on video -- to my knowledge -- and its cable appearances have the frequency of Halley's Comet.)

In the classic sense of the four humors (which are not specific to the concept of funny or even entertainment), Altman's "H.E.A.L.T.H." treats all of the humors, and actually in very funny, entertaining ways. There's the Phlegm, as personified by Lauren Bacall's very slow, guarded, and protective character Esther Brill, who's mission in life appears to be all about appearance, protecting the secrets of her age and beauty more than her well-being. There's Paul Dooley's Choleric Dr. Gil Gainey, who like a fish out of water (perhaps more like a seal) flops around frenetically, barking and exhorting the crowds to subscribe to his aquatic madness. The Melancholy of Glenda Jackson's Isabella Garnell smacks of Shakespeare's troubled and self-righteous Hamlet -- even proffering a soliloquy or two. And let's not forget Henry Gibson's Bile character, Bobby Hammer ("The breast that feeds the baby rules the world"). Then there's the characters Harry Wolff and Gloria Burbank (James Garner and Carol Burnett, respectively), relatively sane characters striving to find some kind of balance amongst all the companion and extreme humors who have convened for H.E.A.L.T.H. -- a kind of world trade organization specializing in H.E.A.L.T.H., which is to say anything but health. This is Altman at his classic best.

This was the very first film I was in as an actor. Robert Altman himself chose me as "The Carrot" after casting director Rick Sparks suggested me for the role. The total experience filming was nothing but positive. Mr. Altman was a delight to work with and watch him gleefully direct his cast of repertory actors. The film was "shelved" for a few years before it was finally released nationwide in limited release. His films are more for "groupies" who "get" his brand of humor, where today Christopher Guest's improvisational films featuring a "rep" group of actors seem to be more widely accepted and understood. Mr. Altman is a sincere passionate director and lets his ensemble of players breathe life into the improvisational scenes. Carol Burnett is a class act on and off the screen. Glenda Jackson equals her. Lauren Bacall was more aloof. James Garner would spend hours signing autographs on the beach for the gallery of fans in the hot sun following the long hours of shooting. He is the consummate pro. Many people may not "get" HEALTH, but it was way ahead of its time and today would be a hit with the world's political scene more controversial as this cast of characters is. P.S. I played "the carrot" in the opening and closing scenes! how's that for getting "roots" as an actor?

RIP Glenda Jackson, first of all. Secondly, when the yellow-overall HealtH singers say "Welcome to HealtH" it sounds like "Hell." So it goes. Third, I'd like that Monte Cristo, thanks.

A decidedly minor work in a run Altman had in the 1970s (into 1980) that stands alone in all of American Cinema for comedic and dramatic chutzpah and innovation in holding no quarter for stylistic convention or even typical taste; it just doesn't add up to a whole lot, mostly as you dont care much about what the Garner and Burnett characters had together, and while I would never use the "this was a Dress Rehearsal for that" with Altman because he just didn't work that way he would have sharper knives out (and more empathy) with a similar ruthless political satire later in the 1980s with Tanner 88 - there's even an "Exercise Your Right to Vote" bit - albeit Lauren Bacall and her knowing-ballyhoo book-to-product line was amusing in its cynical snark.

But within enough individual scenes, and for as thin as their characters are Burnett and Garner bring a lot and my goodness Jackson (the latter's dialog 90% taken from Adlai Stevenson speeches), I found myself laughing a lot, consistently, simply because I knew the actors knew what they were saying in the moment, absurdity and Carlin-esque understanding of "its all BS, folks, and it's bad for ya" in toyal. It's a true Oddity in American motion pictures, so weird that I imagine the studio decided not to release it long before in the runtime that Henry Gibson showed up in drag (how did he not wind up on the Golden Girls?).

And, yeah, Alfred Woodard, disarmingly hilarious because shes so straightfoward with Dick Cavett talking to her, has the right attitude, which is her politely saying: you white mothers are crazy.

This is all to say, what I would've given to share a bong with Bob.

As disjointed as it is, HEALTH is still light years more clever than a lot of movies that get wide release so it's a real head scratcher why it sat on the shelf for so long...and is pretty much forgotten now. Assembling his standard large cast, director Robert Altman makes some pointed comments on the hypocrisy of many health food aficionados. Lauren Bacall and Glenda Jackson are well-used as rivals vying for president of a national health organization. Bacall is the best thing in the movie as she claims to be in her eighties --- and has a dog in his forties to boot! She's also senile and kept alive by a sex-starved nurse and a shady manager. Jackson is the clipped tongue naturalist who views herself some sort of Jesus figure for the Health conscious set. Carol Burnett is terrific as a government representative who grows more and more wary of the health movement the more she is exposed to it. Her interview scene with Dick Cavett, as himself, is priceless. James Garner plays Bacall's manager and he's appropriately caddish. Henry Gibson is a hoot as a political dirty trickster. Paul Dooley and Alfre Woodard have a few funny moments as well.