Teen Lust

I've seen bad 70 and 80's films but this one has to top the list. Despite the cuteness of the female lead Baker, the rest of the film's acting and direction is one huge jumbled mess that has no cohesion. From the creepy father to the bad camera angles and cuts, the film should have been cut down to even less time so we aren't waisting our time.

This is a pretty shocking attempt by famed Asian actor James Hong. I really think he should just stick to what he does best, acting, and not tackle more directing jobs (if he has done more, I will pass on seeing them). Like having Lucas stick to producing and writing and not directing ... they just suck at it.

Cult Asian film figure James Hong should be celebrated for his many diverse acting roles spanning several decades, and certainly NOT for directing this terrible "sex comedy". The only thing more non-existent than his "direction" is the film's script - in fact, IMDb does not even list a screenwriter, and neither does my VHS copy or cover! There are no laughs in this "comedy", unless you consider attempted rape, mental retardation, an incestuous father, an alcoholic mother, etc. the height of hilarity. The very brief flashes of nudity don't even come close to making "Police Girls Academy" (the - misleading - title of my copy) worth sitting through - it's truly one of the most unredeemable films I've seen in the last few months. A rare 0 out of 4 stars.

I'm too astonished to find out how James Hong, notable in several motion pictures and TV shows, would direct terrible movies like TEEN LUST, only one of the four he did. For the first ten minutes, you will be turned on. For the last 80, you will turn this off. I've just seen better exploitation comedy classics recently like GAS PUMP GIRLS (which has Kirsten Baker) and LUNCH WAGON. This one doesn't even attempt to be fun at all, and it obviously was made at a budget of 25 cents. Bambi's nose all bandaged up on her birthday was the only best part. There is, amazingly, a music track in the film that later became known as the theme song for THE PEOPLE'S COURT, seeming like TV producers can borrow anything for success. Check this out if that nice curvacious babe in a pair of white shorts interests you.

TEEN LUST is a lighthearted sexploitation comedy. Before Porky's, before Meatballs, you've got TEEN LUST -- as low budget as they come. If you're in the mood for sexy babes, lust-driven lads, oddballs and geeks, and not to forget unscrupulous cops, then TEEN LUST is the right one for you. I'm a big fan of Kirsten Baker. I've tried to collect all of her films, and in TEEN LUST as a lead role she's great. Also Perry Lang's a fine actor (films like Spring Break and The Hearse) and he does a good job. Some of the best scenes involve a mentally challenged character. You've just got to see it. This is one that gets better and better the more times you watch it. 7 out of 10

Seriously, if you don't laugh at least twice whilst watching this clever teen sexploitation comedy, then you may be either dead, or have the same pitiable problem as the obviously biased reviewers who rated it poor.

Yes, this is a TEEN SEXPLOITATION COMEDY and as such it is not for those who imagine it to be anything else other than outrageous, or for those who need to remove the tight plug that apparently has hardened inside of their anal orifice, preventing them from understanding clever humour.

In its genre, this film pre-dates and fairly well defines the very beginning of the TSC film type, doing an admirable job in that category.

I challenge you not to laugh as you watch and if you don't, then you probably have a dire mental problem of some sort.