Piranha

This is just one of those films which cannot justify much of anything that happens. These people are going on a trek: the young girl wants to photograph animals. There really are no Piranhas, but I guess the psychotic hunter guy is the real piranha. Anyway, there are lots of animals and there is lots of driving. There is considerable anti-gun talk, but we all know where that is going. Toward the end, there's lots of action and a rape thrown in. Somebody must pay, and they do. It would have been nice to have a couple of piranhas to sort of fill the thing out. There were lots of monkeys. If you fast forward through the dull parts, you have a tight little five minutes.

I got this on a multi-title DVD of monster movies, so it not being a monster movie was a bit surprising, but as the movie was playing I kind of realized it was going that way fairly quickly.

It's an early 70's Crime Thriller of sorts set in the jungles of Venezuela instead of the big city streets.

Besides not being the piranha-fest most people were hoping for, this crime-thriller type of movie moves too slow for most people's liking and not enough happens.

The hurried turn of events at the end is kind of lackluster and even non-realistic in how it happens in many ways.

It's kind of like the end was thrown on quickly when they realized they had enough other footage to pad the movie out to 90 mins., or they were running out of time and money. There's plenty of animal stock footage, diamond mining footage, and a pretty much pointless motorcycle race.....

The ending was kind of predictable too once there were only a few players left and some resolution of the conflict evolving was inevitable.

I wanted to like the movie more, but it just was weaker than it should have been on too many fronts, probably why it's a bargain title or thrown in on multi-title DVD's so cost of it should be around $1 or so to see it.

Desperately seeking diamonds, a band of adventurers discover that life in the wild is not all fun and games. After traveling throughout the land on motorcycles and seeing several scenes of birds, they stop at a local pub to drink heavily and absorb the culture. As they become engulfed into the culture and the land, they gather the aid of a hunter named Caribe that has not only mastered a bike race, but also harbors a darker plan. When they arrive to their destination the sight of diamonds turns to dust as these friends are forced to play prey and predator with an evil that wears a familiar face.

William Gibson directs this poorly acted, scripted, and pause-ridden suspense thriller that is easily lost in the shuffle of modern day cinema. The low budget is very obvious as Gibson riddles the film with overlapping scenes of birds, birds, and more birds to fill time. We are even shown unending scenes of diamond mining and bike racing, leaving nothing to develop characters or story. We are even shorted on the title of this film as there are only two mentions of the flesh eating fish.

Back-stories are underdeveloped leaving us a lack of emotion for the main characters and building an emotionless climax that only gave us hope that the film was over. Nothing was worth saving in this film, unless you enjoy studying birds from different countries (outside of the one that the film takes place). Gibson missed the entire focus of this film and the final result reminds us of a preschooler's first collage where there were tons of images, massive amounts of glue, and no real structure.

Grade: * out of ****

Brother (Simcox) and sister (Capri) are a pair of photographers visiting Venezuela to shoot the Amazon. With Peter Brown joining them as guide at the airport, they set out by motorcycle for the Amazon, stopping at a seedy bar along the way where they meet Caribe, a local hunter of notoriety (Smith). Mesmerised by his charisma, they agree to hook-up and venture deep into diamond mining territory where relations become strained and Caribe's sinister ulterior motive is revealed.

Almost sounds entertaining. Note to self - it isn't. Yes, like possibly everyone else who's seen this movie, I thought it was something it wasn't (i.e. a film about piranha). The DVD box cover however did imply that it was reminiscent of "The Most Deadly Game" where the hunter hunts his human prey after giving them a head start. Also not true. What is true is that this is a C-grade faunalogue in which Capri, still traumatised by a dark family secret, tries in vain to persuade Smith he should subscribe to the RSPCA. Smith's response is ultimately what you'd expect from his character - brutal and sadistic.

An aimless motorcycle race, a Venezuelan booty-call and a lesson in diamond mining punctuate what is merely an outline of a narrative concept - both thin on plot and light on quality. Smith is okay in his typical brawny style, Brown is wooden and in case you're still wondering, yes, there is a piranha scene contained in this film, although doubtful it satisfies the content requirements to live up to its dubious title. Meat pies are required to contain a minimum quantity of actual meat to qualify as a meat pie; what we have here is suitable only for vegetarians.

Like the above poster, I got burned on the title thinking I was getting the other Piranha... This movie is everything the above poster said and worse...

Poor camera, lousy acting and just plain horrid storyline...

There was very little here that was even worth watching... How this movie even got released is beyond me.

Make sure the movie you buy is the one you want... and not this one.

The movie I bought was labeled "Piranha" and not "Piranha, Piranha!" which is what it actually is... This is the only way they sold this movie at all.

Peace Out.