Werewolves on Wheels

This film is a masterpiece! Thrill to hairy, disgusting guys riding enormous motorcycles with no hands! Cringe in horror as they beat the living daylights out of some guy at a gas station. Wonder just what the heck is going on as hordes of barefoot monks descend from the hills to offer bread and wine. Keep your notebook handy, because a step-by-step lesson in dark spirit-summoning is there waiting for you (hint: freshly cut Hazelwood). Ponder the homoerotic subtext. See the worst Tarot card reading in all history. There's even a charming softshoe routine for the kids. There's a couple of decent corpses in this movie, too. and the soundtrack is hot, hot HOT!!! I liked the ending.

if you're looking for late night viewing while riding out a rough weekend, this is one piece of C grade cinema that will definitely entertain. it's best not to attempt to follow the plot, and just try to enjoy it scene for scene. some surprisingly inventive dialog at times and inspired casting for backing roles...check out the disturbed gas station attendant. It's a mix of Ed Wood's guerilla film-making style and Roger Corman's sense of poetic bohemia. Then the acid kicks in. its apparent the filmmakers were partaking in some type of recreational or experimental activities. the subtle charm of the avant-gardeness of it all seems to almost offset the fact that most of it makes little or no sense. i'm sure someone somewhere has found deeper meaning in this film than it deserves. But how can you go wrong with Satanic bikers who turn into werewolves? gather up the family after Thanksgiving and drop this gem on your relatives.

This was a cool, funky little film, kind of an attempt to mix Easy Rider with any werewolf film. The Devils Advocates are a dirty, sleazy, nasty biker gang who live on the road, stopping only to sleep, drink and screw. When they stop one night at the foot of a Satanic Temple, and are offered food and drink by the monks, their life on the road gets a little weirder.

No, sadly, you really don't get to see hairy werewolves howling maniacally as they drive down dark highways illuminated by the full moon. What you do get is an attempt at artiness, as scenes are intercut with shots of black birds wheeling through the still air, a drugged girl dances naked before a fire as deranged monks deliver a spooky chant and a tarot reader displays talents more accurate than many I've seen in the movies. There's some absolutely hysterical additional dialogue and parts of the film almost have a documentary type feel to it. No, it's not the worlds most flawless film by any means, but it's better than a lot of the crap that was coming out around the same time. It has a realistic grittiness to it, yet at the same time possesses an ethereal atmosphere. It was just funky enough to impress me.

I can't give this high marks because a lot was left unrevealed, as if there was no cohesive story from the start. Was there symbology in the grime-covered skin of the Satanists transferring over to the bikers as they scuffle, only for the last bikers to fall into the life of deviltry? Was there symbolism in the free and savage outlaw lifestyle of bikers who simply followed their leader, who then turn into tribal dust-covered chanters around a campfire? Was there symbolism in the monks removing everything holy from the church and making it their own, leading unknown bikers to use their land for partying, thinking Christian monks would leave them to their own devices, not knowing that Satanic monks would force themselves onto them? It was entertaining enough though. The soundtrack helped invoke the carefree outlaw biker feel along with grit and decadence. Seemingly asexual character Tarot was the spiritual voice of reason that could save the day, while leader Adam was too mean and angry to hear reason, and the rest were just Yes Men to Adam, but Tarot also lacks conviction and faith, depending too much on his own understanding to convince others to act differently. As bikers go, it definitely had the feel, as werewolves go, it could have used a lot more. I didn't like the intensity of the Satanic rituals but you can't say Tarot didn't try to turn the others away.

Like it or not, Werewolves On Wheels is the undisputed best of the biker/werewolf sub-genre. A chillin' little B-movie, that is well aware that it is a B-movie, hence the title. You can really tell these guys had fun making this. We begin with a biker gang riding across country. These aren't just any bikers, they're The Devil's Advocates, so we already know they're mean mothers. In reality, The Devil's Advocates are a bunch of crude, obnoxious drug-addicts on motorcycles, who like to think they're in cahoots with the Devil, but lately, there is some kind of evil hovering over them. As luck would have it, there is a psychic in the group, so, you know that he'll shed some light on the situation so they can locate this evil, and kick its ass. They decide that a nearby satanic church is the root of their alleged problems, once they arrive, they're distracted by all the free wine from the satanic monks, which gives them the chance to place a curse on The Devil's Advocates. A curse that would leave, at least one of them a werewolf. Now, with all of this going on, the guys decide to take it to the desert, so they can clear their heads, and say their ooblah-dooblah's, but, not before kicking all the monk's asses. Now, among the wide-open freedom of the desert, The Devil's Advocates can get as drunk, high, and rowdy as they please. The only problem is, every time everyone passes out, someone gets torn to shreds. Who knows? Maybe the psychic can help matters. Probably not, though.

Werewolves on Wheels, above all, is a good old-fashion fun B-movie, without a lot of thought put into continuity, or script, for that matter. They just went out there and entertained the drive-in crowd that it was clearly intended for. True, they could have explained things a little better, and the killings could have been better/gorier, but the atmosphere, score, and of course, the cheesy entertainment value more than make up for the flaws. For a much better example of a werewolf movie, check out Ginger Snaps, and for a much better example of life in the desert, check out The Chooper. Werewolves On Wheels certainly isn't one of the all time greats in werewolf horror, but as far as the biker/werewolf sub genre goes, look no further, because Werewolves On Wheels is the measuring stick. 7/10