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The engaging, jet-set jazzy thriller, 'A Quiet Place to Kill' (1970) aka 'Paranoia' is another visually resplendent, sinfully stylish Giallo from the playful master of sexual intrigue, Umberto 'Eyeball' Lenzi. Many Gialli fans share the opinion that this murderously Machiavellian Mediterranean outing is markedly inferior to his iconic, highly regarded, Martini-cool Giallo masterclass, 'Orgasmo' (1969), but maestro Lenzi's fizzy, cocktail-fuelled psychodrama, 'A Quiet Place to Kill' distils a no less intoxicating plot, as our emotionally fragile heroine, Helen (Carroll Baker) recuperates from a car accident, she fatefully reunites with her dashingly duplicitous ex-husband Maurice (Jean Sorel), and before you can say 'lashings of J&B-laced jiggery-pokery', increasingly fell deeds turn Helen's louche, seaside convalescence into a memorably murderous ménages à trois!

With its luxurious lounge-core soundtrack, ubiquitously labyrinthine plotting, glamorous vistas, sublime fashions, and a nuenced performance from one of the most delectably diminutive divas of Gialli, the golden-haired, sinfully skittish, glitteringly glamorous screen goddess, Carroll Baker. Sadly, poor Helen suffers greatly at the manicured hands of her scheming, beguilingly suave, cocksure paramour Maurice. This preternaturally gorgeous male, disingenuously clad in benign, pastel-hued v-neck sweaters, slyly harbours hateful plots against his significant others! Incredibly, Sorel's perverse preference for Val Donican's Christmas wardrobe does little to mute his sleekly manipulative portrait of a callous, languidly libidinous playboy on the make, thereby making the appealingly sin-dappled, breezily-paced, 'A Quiet Place to Kill' a scintillating, must-see Giallo for all Lenzi-Baker Gialli fans!

Notable actors: Carroll Baker! Jean Sorel!

I'm required by law to explain that the alternative title for this film is Paranoia, but that is the real title of Lenzi's other Giallo, Orgazmo, and that there's another Umberto Lenzi film called An Ideal Place to Kill too. Also, at least four Umberto Lenzi gialli star Carroll Baker, and additionally they are all generally of the 'bunch of people scheming against each other' plots rather than 'someone carving up Euro-babes' variety. Got that?

*Absolute silence from the rest of the Universe*

Right. This one starts off with Carroll Baker as a racing car driver who has some sort of brain fart while driving and ends up in hospital. Once discharged, she finds that she's been invited to the big fancy house of ex-husband/complete jerk playboy shag machine Jean Sorel, who previously mooched all of her money. Being a character in a film, she doesn't just throw the invite in the bin, but instead immediately packs her bags and drives off there.

Once there, Carroll realises that Jean has remarried an extremely rich lady who owns oil fields. It also turns out that this lady is the one who sent the invite - but for what reason? To play footsie with her under the table while Jean is doing the same thing? This lady, Constance, wants to be Carroll's new special friend, but is it for the usual giallo reasons (i.e slow motion lesbian sex scene)? Much discussion of how men are bastards ensues.

It's hard to write about these films without revealing the entire plot, and the twists are the highlights of the film, so let's be as vague as possible. There may or may not be a murder halfway through the film but a tremendous amount of obstacles suddenly present themselves that the killer (or killers) that they have to surmount to avoid being caught (that's if they murdered anyone, which they might have). Someone with a film camera may or may not have unwittingly filmed the murder which possibly leads to a hypothetical scene where everyone involved has to watch the film, plus there might even be the sudden appearance of someone else later in the film to throw a spanner in the works. Or perhaps not.

What I will reveal is that Umberto Lenzi further cements his position as the top animal killer of Italian cinema by having a scene set at a pigeon shooting club. It isn't enough that the guy would go out of his way to kill animals in his cannibal films, but here's a giallo that racks up a few pigeon deaths for the sake of a film. LEEENNNNZZZIIIII!!!!!

Just like his other late sixties Gialli, Lenzi has the whole film look amazing, keeps the camera angles fresh, but reigns in the psychedelics. He does include the old 'dancing in the club' scene that's a favourite from this particular era, including a band who wouldn't have looked out of place in the early nineties!

Slow to start, but as usual Lenzi proves he can tell the same story, with the same actors, a different way, and have everything and everyone look like an ad for a holiday villa.

And that's it - that's all the Carroll Baker gialli watched too, with the exception of some obscure psuedo-giallo called The Body from 1974. Carroll would later go on to star as the pushy mother of the bad guy in Big Arnie's Kindergarten Cop!

It's about three people, and one of them dies, and then often ridiculous consequences ensue for the two left. That's the plainest way to summarize A Quiet Place to Kill, and though it's not too special, I think it's fairly entertaining for a sleazy and in-your-face movie of its age. It's now old enough that the sleazy stuff feels a little more quaint, so watched today, it's almost restrained, in a way? I wouldn't go as far as to call it classy, but if it had been made a little more recently, I think it could've overstepped certain things.

Anyway, it's still pretty much a soap opera, but it works if you're after something heightened, melodramatic, and pulpy. My mind wasn't on this 100% while it was playing, and I actually think that was the ideal way to engage with it, in all honesty.

I was somewhat confused as it appears that Italian director Umberto Lenzi, who will always be known in my book for his notorious cannibal flicks, has two movies that share the same alternative title, and they were only made one year apart. Even on the disc extra he seems a little confused himself when talking about it! Anyway, this Paranoia is not a horror movie, Furthermore there is no unknown killer, we know who the killer is, but the police don't. So I'd be hard pressed to call this a genuine Giallo, though it certainly has some traits of that sub-genre. As is so typical of Italian movies from this time Paranoia is stunningly beautiful, every scene is like a piece of art. Accompanied by beautiful naked women, fast cars, bottles of J&B whiskey and a jazzy soundtrack this is a very cool movie, with some great plot twists and turns One of the highlights is a fast car ride along a winding road with sharp hair pin turns and sheer drops into the sea. It actually made my palms sweat! Great movie.

When you think of Carroll Baker, you most likely remember her roles in Elia Kazan's "Baby Doll" or George Stevens's "Giant", or something of that nature. What you might not know is that she spent a few years in Italy starring in giallo movies. Among her most notable outings in this genre were Umberto Lenzi's movies. She started with his "Orgasmo"* (called "Paranoia" in the US), playing a rich woman from the US who has a bizarre experience with some young people in Italy. Another entry in this genre was Lenzi's "Paranoia" (called "A Quiet Place to Kill" in the US, to avoid confusion with the other movie).

My interpretation of this movie is clouded by the poor copy that I watched; the DVD kept skipping over damaged areas, so I don't know how much of the movie I saw. What I saw was tolerable, if less than stellar.

Whatever the case, these movies are good for a watch. And seriously, was Carroll Baker a babe or what? Okay, if nothing else.

*I learned of Baker from this movie. It turned out that I'd already seen her in some movies, but she hadn't registered in my mind previously.