La Bête de la Caverne Hantée

The Corman family (notably Roger) has this nasty habit of padding a movie with lots of walking. Oh sure, there are variations on the theme. Generally, though you will find yourself subjected to a tour of Bronson Canyon, or wherever they decided to film that day's movie. Brother Gene has added variety by giving us lots of SKIING!!

The plot involves four theives who stage a mine explosion in South Dakota to divert the town's attention while the bank is relieved of gold bars - but only six bars! Why six? Why, they're going cross-country skiing to the lodge of a local man, and that's all they can carry. From there, they will hop a plane to Canada. Unfortunately, there's a monster following the crooks, sort of a cross between a spider and Bigfoot with extra floppy arms.

If it all sounds odd, that's because it is. The tension between the boss (I suspect it's really Donald Sutherland undercover) and his *ahem* secretary is almost palpable. Frank Sinatra's cousin's performance is outstanding, definitely paving the way for Frank Stallone's run of fame years later.

The disturbing thing is that if these crooks are into putting their fellow fireworks manufacturers out of business, why are we robbing banks in South Dakota? Let's face it, South Dakota is not known for much other than Sturgis and it's motorcycle rally. I'm trying to figure out how partially robbing a bank in South Dakota cements your claim to the fireworks empire. Fortunately, I have other things to worry about other than these jokers.

Sterno says spin your spider web somewhere else.

The beast seems to be some kind of tree limb through most of the movie. He begins following them LONG, LONG before they ever stumble upon his cave and then, mysteriously, they just do. Two scenes stand out. A group of the criminals are in some cabin and they just finished some lame dialogue and then they just stand there, since they finished all their lines, with about five or six seconds of dead air, waiting for the director to yell "CUT!" They try not to appear lost but they clearly are.

The other scene is in the cave where some Mexican or Filipino woman is captive (she's being held by what looks like spider webs) and when someone else comes in to inquire about one of the other captives, or something like that, she blurts out "he is SUCKING HER BLOOD" or words to that effect. The scary music is cued and this semi-transparent beast, who appears to be a man wearing a blanket over his head, with tree limbs for arms, walks over and begins on one of the captives, who begins a long, plaintive howl, presumably of agony, albeit psychological agony.

It was so ludicrous that I couldn't stop laughing.

On paper, this simply couldn't go wrong! The long-feature debut of brilliant director/producer Monte Hellman ("Two-Lane Backtop", "Cockfighter"), owing its existence to legendary producer Roger Corman, and fully belonging in one of my favorite cinematic hypes of all time: cheap 50's monstrous B-movies! Evidently, a whole lot went wrong… From sheer boring dialogs over irrelevant sub plots and onwards to a largely absent and – above all – uninspired titular monster design. The "beast" looks like a vague shape covered in cobwebs and that's just plain lame; even according to zero-budget 50's horror standards. The basic plot definitely holds potential, and for the first 20 minutes or so, I felt convinced I was watching a undiscovered gem of the genre. But the, incomprehensibly, the plot somehow stopped evolving and became an unendurably boring ordeal to struggle through. A quartet of gangsters carefully planned a risky gold heist near a skiing resort. Whilst the drunken love interest already embarks on a skiing trip with the instructor, the other three break into a bank before joining the others. During their perfect alibi, however, the assembly encounters (eventually) a hairy and aggressive monster living in the mountain caves. "Beast from Haunted Cave" is a nearly insufferably dull film, and that's all the more painful to acknowledge due to the promising intro. The heist concept is ingenious, the characters are intriguing (the girl is a manic depressive drunk and one of the robbers is a womanizer) and the ski-resort setting is quite effective (cashing in on the contemporary Abominable Snowman paranoia). The rudimentary plot ingredients for a charming 50's monster-mayhem flick are well present, but I'm extremely reluctant to announce this movie is an utter failure. Disappointing to the nth degree

This film details the plot of a group of gold-robbers who unwittingly run into trouble when they become stalked by a strange spider-like beast while hiding out from the police in the woods.

This film is Slow..very slow..too slow for most people to stick with till the end and that's a shame as the ending has a surprisingly effective climatic showdown with the monster which is certainly entertaining. There's some decent thoughtful dialogue in this movie as well.

One of the rarest experiences for a B-movie fanatic is to find a film you haven't seen in 30-plus years is much better than your childhood memory of it. While "Beast From Haunted Cave" was obviously made on a shoestring -- it's a Gene "Brother Of Roger" Corman production, so what do you expect? -- first-time director Monte Hellman (The Shooting, Two Lane Blacktop) had a better-than-average script and capable actors, not to mention a director of photography who made effective use of the stark winter landscape near Deadwood, South Dakota.

The film starts out slow as a gang plans and executes a robbery, but then it veers off into darker territory as they and their guide are trailed to the hideout by a surprisingly well-realized and startlingly nasty monster.

This is by no means a perfect film: There are occasional stumbles in motivation, dialogue and the timing of events, yet for me these inconsistencies actually contributed to an atmosphere of dreamlike disorientation as the story plays out against the bleached-bone white of the snow and the soot-black shadows of winter pines. The plight of the Beast's victims -- cocooned alive, and fully aware as it feeds on them -- yields a heaping helping of shudders.

The DVD transfer (I'm talking about the most recent release, not the one paired with "The Brain That Wouldn't Die") was made from an excellent print; the soundtrack is quite clear. You may recognize the score as the same used for "Attack Of The Giant Leeches" and -- I think -- "Night Of The Blood Beast": These guys knew how to recycle!

Even with its defects, this is a distinctly weird and surprisingly gruesome chiller, a fine example of how much can be accomplished even with limited resources.