La chérie de Jupiter

Historically hysterically satirical, this showcase for the swimming talents of Olympian-turned-actress Esther Williams and the vocal talents of the great Howard Keel, is ostensibly set in the Roman Empire but reeks of 1950s Hollywood. Based on the landmark 1927 play "The Road to Rome" by the great Robert Sherwood, this movie did not fare well at the box office, but the reason may be that it was too racy, the lyrics and dialogue too ironic for the times. Dealing humorously with Hannibal's march on Rome, the story line is really a plea against war and features a gloriously athletic Williams driving a chariot, looking like Wonder Woman, and escaping her pursuers in a breathtaking underwater chase scene. Marge and Gower Champion's dance sequences are equally athletic and mesmerizing, especially their dance with Hannibal's elephants. While the songs may not be particularly memorable, the lyrics are often hilarious, especially "If This Be Slav'ry" and "Never Trust a Woman." The narration sung/spoken by Richard Haydn is also an amusing touch. The film opens with a caveat that sets the tone: "In 216 B.C., Hannibal the Barbarian marched on Rome. The history of this great march has always been confused. This picture will do nothing to clear it up."

Enormous in scope and production with elephants, horses, and a cast of thousands of costumed, weaponized extras, this picture is a cute diversion for an hour and a half. Esther Williams is downright gorgeous, period. The superbly dependable Howard Keel didn't have to visit the cafeteria, inasmuch as he spent the whole picture chewing the scenery. The battle scenes were well-shot, the humor and 1955ish lust delightfully presented. The Champions deliver their usual athletic dence routines to witty choreography by Hermes Pan. Unfortunately, the lyrics of the infrequent songs are abysmal, probably the result of a competition MGM sponsored for high school students. Fortunately, the tuneless, unmemorable music for these songs stoops to the level of the words. Still, just to catch an eyeful of the well-put-together Ms. Williams and Mr. Keel make this a pleasant way to kill an hour and a half.

I don't have many of the great MGM musicals of the 1940s and 50s in my video collection, but my interest in history resulted in my acquiring this decidedly minor work. I couldn't pass it up. Ancient history in American cinema tends (heavily) to be biblical history with a handful of glances at Ancient Egypt and Rome. Seriously, think of the best known titles: DeMille's THE TEN COMMANDMENTS [second version], SAMSON AND DELILAH, KING OF KINGS, THE SIGN OF THE CROSS, CLEOPATRA; THE EGYPTIAN; Joe Mankiewicz's CLEOPATRA; QUO VADIS (with Taylor, Kerr, and Ustinov); THE LAND OF THE PHAROAHS [with Joan Collins]. Films about ancient Greece are even rarer than this: THE FOUR HUNDRED SPARTANS (for the events leading to the defeat of Persia in 480 B.C.); HELEN OF TROY and ULYSSES (the latter actually an Italian film, but starring Kirk Douglas and Anthony Quinn); JASON AND THE ARGONAUTS. There are a few I've missed. Foreign cinemas have not been much better.

This film is about one of history's great military failures - Hannibal Barca, the Carthagenian tactical genius who is remembered for bringing his army over the alps (including his elephants - a feat of arms that is still marvelled at). He was of Phoenician ancestry, being from the city of Carthage in North Africa (founded by the Phoenicians). He probably was dark skinned, like most North Africans. He probably did not look like Howard Keel, a good actor and singer (KISS ME KATE, CALAMITY JANE - the latter as Wild Bill Hickok, THE DAY OF THE TRIFFIDS). Since this is a musical comedy the audience will swallow it, but from a historical realistic view the role cried for a singer and actor with a darker skin - someone like Paul Robson. However, for age reasons and political reasons Robson would have been impossible in 1955.

The basis of this film is Robert Sherwood's play, THE ROAD TO ROME, which was a comedy against war. Actually beyond this is the fact that Hannibal, having won five great victories against the Romans (capped by the total routs of Roman arms at Lake Transemene and Cannae) had the "road to Rome" open for his army - had he moved he would have destroyed Rome, and history would have been centered in North Africa for quite awhile. His dawdling lost him his chance, and the tactics of the Roman General Fabius Maximus (to snipe at Hannibal's army over a long period of time, until it was tired and demoralized) won the war after a decade. Fabius was killed in a skirmish, but his place was taken by Scipio Africanus, who delivered the knock-out blow at Zama in 202 B.C. Hannibal fled Carthage, to commit suicide in Macedonia a number of years later when he was about to be handed over to the Romans. Carthage was stripped of it's power and wealth, but nearly sixty years later it was purposely destroyed by the Romans (at the prodding of Cato the Elder, a bigotted Senator) in the pointless Third Punic "War". The population was killed or enslaved, and the town levelled - the site ploughed over with salt so nothing would ever grow there. Hence the bitter term: "Carthagenean Peace". But the memory of Rome's close call at the hands of this genius was a constant nightmare even at the height of their empire. In the AENIAD, Vergil has the doomed North African princess Dido die, praying that her descendant (Hannibal) destroys the Romans. Prior to the collapse of the Empire at the hands of "barbarian" tribes Hannibal was Rome's closest call to destruction.

This play may have been good in 1927, but it dates now. Moreover, Sherwood, despite some stage credits like IDIOT'S DELIGHT, is best remembered for his dual biography (which is still useful) ROOSEVELT AND HOPKINS, about FDR and his advisor Harry Hopkins. Keeping this in mind, my use of the term "minor" is understandable. It is not like a musical based on, say a play by Eugene O'Neill or Tennessee Williams. [Actually O'Neill plays have been turned into musicals: NEW GIRL IN TOWN is based on ANNA CRISTIE, and AH WILDERNESS! was turned into the musical TAKE ME ALONG.]

Williams and Keel are attractive together, but the Burton Lane score is not that good (a number with Marge and Gower Champion about the elephants seems very silly now). George Sanders gives his normally good performance, his Fabius being a mother-dominated type (momma is Norma Varden, who disapproves of his choice of Williams as a wife), but who is an intelligent military leader - witness how he realizes that the best way to fight Hannibal is not to present a pitched battle, but to wear him down. The action of the film is in 217 B.C., when the war was peaking for Hannibal, and Fabius did not die for nearly six years more. Interestingly enough Douglas Dumbrille has a brief part as Scipio, reminding us that the military affairs would remain in highly capable hands at the end. William Demerest is properly flustered a few times, constantly ready to give the signal for the final advance of the Carthageneans on Rome, only to find Hannibal unavailable or unwilling to tell him to do so. One wishes more had been done with Richard Haydn, as a historian named Horatio, but he seems wasted here. A film curiosity - not a great film though.

Esther Williams, Howard Keel, and husband-and-wife dancing team Marge and Gower Champion star in this musical about Hannibal. I went into this a little wary, but wanted to see one of Esther's lesser-known films. Granted, it may have earned a somewhat campy and corny reputation, but I found as I got deeper and deeper into it, that I really enjoyed it. What's a little ingenious about it, is that they worked in an Esther Williams swimming interlude in a dramatic way, as she is being chased. And, the great supporting cast of George Sanders, William Demarest, Douglas Dumbrille and Richard Haydn helps a lot. And, both Howard Keel and Esther are very believable as these mythological characters, she so beautiful and he so big, virile, and commanding. This is the type of film, that one will have the dialogue and especially the songs memorized from watching this over and over, because it's so much of a guilty pleasure. I definitely am going to see this again soon. I was going to give this a seven, given the fact this isn't one of Esther's top successes, but it's just so enjoyable, that I give it an '8.' After all, who cares what movie critics think? Just sit back and enjoy the histrionics of Hannibal and Amytis. By the way, do you think this is accurate?

A legendary MGM flop, one of the big musicals reputed to have helped kill off big musicals. And it's pretty silly in spots, with a buff Gower Champion singing lyrics like "If this be slavery/ I don't want to be free!" and song-and-dance cues arriving perfunctorily. But it's also an enterprising effort at keeping a dying genre alive, with plenty of sung-lyric exposition by Richard Haydn as a bewildered historian, and more plot-song integration than most MGM musicals attempted. It's also sexier than the average musical, quite frank about why Hannibal kept delaying his attack on Rome, and with plenty of chemistry between Esther Williams and Howard Keel in the main plot and the Champions as the secondary, comic-relief couple. The Burton Lane-Harold Adamson songs aren't great, but they aren't terrible, and for such a huge production, it's surprisingly light on its feet and irreverent. There's a fairly exciting, well-edited chase-through-the-water climax, and if Dorothy Kingsley's screenplay doesn't achieve the Shavian heights it's attempting to scale, it's smarter than most musical screenplays of the day. The wide screen is well filled, and the thing moves quickly. Well worth a look.