Mystery Liner

Professor Grimson invents a device which can power a liner by remote control. Obviously enemy spies would love to get ahold of the device and send an agent to mix among the various vacationers unnoticed while he or she sabotaged the ship. The inventor is strangled and the crew must wait until the steering experiment is proven a success before the saboteur strikes, and what has this all to do with the ship's captain, Holling taking ill right before the ship is to depart. Very shoddy script and direction send this one to Davy Jones locker. The first 45 minutes is describing parts of the mechanism, then introducing the passengers and watching them mingle with each other before anything remotely interesting happens at the end, which last about three minutes, and seems so out of place with the pace of the earlier footage. Not good, even by Monogram standards. Zeffie Tilbury is annoying as the old lady looking for romance. Only plus for this film for me, was that, as always, Astrid Allwyn looked cute as a button. Edwin Maxwell and Gustav Von Seyffertitz lend a sinister presence. Rating- 3.

MYSTERY LINER (1934)

* 1/2 (out of four)

The ship is sailing the ocean when bodies begin to pile up. Is it a stowaway? The captain? Another member? The biggest mystery is trying to figure a way to stay awake. Typical overly talkative Monogram film that tries to be mysterious but forgets to be interesting. Monogram was always smart by releasing films very short (usually under 65 minutes) but this film really doesn't have a thing going for it. By the time the movie is over it feels like a grade D film.

Available on DVD through various PD companies.

This is the kind of low rent movie Monogram was justifiably famous for when they weren't making no budget westerns. Secret agents, secret passages, etc.

This one has to do with a government project to control ships at sea with a radio control device called S505. In order to test the device, the scientific team installs it in a cruise ship with the cooperation of the captain and his staff. This was 1934 and we didn't actually have an enemy, so Monogram created a "foreign power" as the antagonist, and installed a couple of agents aboard the ship to steal the main component of the device and sabotage the experiment. We spend the rest of the picture trying to figure out who is who - and there really are secret passages.

Monogram, as was their practice, cast this picture with fading stars and familiar character actors. This effort stars Noah Beery although he only shows up at the beginning and end of the show. The real "star" is Edwin Maxwell, supported by George Cleveland and Gustav Von Seyffertitz. You get the picture.

I won't go any further into the story. It is a pretty formulaic spy yarn you could find on any double bill in any cheap theater back in the old days. But there are those of us that really love them. In fact, although I live in New Mexico, I recently made a pilgrimage to Hollywood. Not for the usual reasons, but to track back the homes and locations of my favorite old time actors and the locations of all those Poverty Row studios of the day. I actually found the original office address of Monogram at the wrong end of Sunset Blvd. I'm afraid most devotees would be disappointed to find that the actual address is occupied by a take out chicken joint. The sound stages across the street are now occupied by what appears to be a television station. I didn't care. I was standing on hallowed ground. I could imagine "The Duke", (whose ranch location I also visited in Encino) driving through the gate in his Chrysler Phantom.

The movie has a predictable ending, but the trip there is still entertaining. I have a brother who probably wouldn't appreciate it because it doesn't have a message, it doesn't have a basso thematic orchestration with all the bells and gongs, and it doesn't excite the viewer with sweeping visual images. But for the rest of us peasants, it rounds out the weekend just like grilled bratwurst, potato salad and beer.

This Edgar Wallace murder mystery takes place aboard an ocean liner being piloted automatically, as everyone and his grandmother is trying to get hold of the tube that pilots the ship without benefit of human hands. Ed Maxwell, veteran of the early silver seen, has a decent role as an investigating private eye. He may remind some of Nero Wolfe. Zeffie Tilbury, as Granny Plympton, a familiar face from Little Rascals shorts, was the most annoying character. No mystery here, and dreadfully acted and sound-produced to boot. It feels like a play transferred directly to Hollywood. Some of the performers would appear to have come right from the NY stage.

This is a bit of a curiosity. I don't know much about Noah Beery, but his name on the top of the bill is interesting. He barely appears in the movie. It's about some secret navigation device for piloting ships by remote control. There is an enemy force that is after it and its inventor. On board an ocean liner, where it is being tested, the captain (Beery) becomes deranged and is replaced. Soon a couple murders take place and the captain is seen by people (though he quickly disappears). There is some device where people communicate using a machine where you write in cursive hand. Of course, radio has been invented. This is so silly. There's also a subplot with he romantic aspirations of an old woman who is utterly insufferable. Her being there contributes nothing but the screeching of nails on a blackboard. There is really no plot and in the end I'm not sure anything was resolved. Not really much of a movie.