Crumb Catcher

Crumb Catcher gets a 7/10 from me. It's a weird little movie that reminded me of some of those offbeat indie/art house films from the '90s-stuff like Barton Fink or The Dark Backward. Most of it takes place in one house, with a small group of characters, and it slowly builds from awkward to intense in a way that kept me interested. It's dark, kind of funny in a messed-up way, and has a look that really fits the mood.

It's not perfect-the acting isn't the greatest, there's too much shaky cam, some of the dialogue feels flat, and a few scenes seem to be trying a little too hard to be strange or meaningful. Still, it has a strong style and doesn't play it safe, which I appreciate. If you like movies that are a little off-center and don't mind some rough edges, this one's worth checking out.

There is nothing to like about this movie. That is why the only reviews that are positive about it are fake reviews.

None of the characters are likable. You can't relate to them. The story is completely bad. It makes no sense at all.

There is no suspense in this movie. It is just a whole lot of stupid people doing stupid things. I don't usually do this, but I am telling you to not watch this movie. You will never get that nearly two hours back.

Other than that, I don't know what to tell you. It is boring, poorly conceived, stupid, weird actors playing weird characters that you don't care about.

REALLY HORRID.

So the movie is entirely about watching the train derail and whether the audience will be satisfied with how badly these horrible people get the comeuppance that is due each and every one of them a trillion-fold times infinity via a devilishly brutal climax.

And meh. Some stuff happens. But not nearly to the absurd degree needed to undue the abysmal portrayals throughout.

Instead, at the very end it sadly tried to play on sympathies that just simply weren't there. So no, it did not succeed at the Gothic Noir stage play thing it was going for - which is a total bummer since I usually like things that Larry Fessenden has a hand in.

It is tense. For sure. Someone might like that.

"Came back, Shane" was a funny line.

But cult films are earned over time. This seems to be a project by the skotchdopole family. One of em directed, and a bunch of them produced it. When shane and leah get married, he's worried that some big secret will come to light. Although he isn't even sure if the secret really happened. And when they get to the house where they are spending their honeymoon, they spend the whole time arguing. They don't seem to do that thing that honeymooners are famous for doing. And when the creeps show up to blackmail shane, why don't they just call the cops?? Or shane could just fill his bride in on the big secret. This seems to be chris skotchdopole's first full length film direction. Some of the reviews on the film are more entertaining than watching the film itself. Maybe they should have spent the budget on getting the "invention" developed. It's probably the most interesting thing about the film. But it just really isn't a practical invention. Although the line "bingo, bongo, up the congo!" was pretty funny too. It wants to be a cult film, but it's just dark and quirky. Lots of plot holes. All horrible people. Why didn't they just call the cops? Watch it if you have the patience. It IS his first big film.

What is a good genre title for movies that require protagonists to be stupid for the movie to last full length status? Usually these movies are gothic, describing families moving into haunted houses, then staying 2 hours through virtue of idiocy through ignoring hellish circumstances. But they always encompass allowing an outside entity, human or otherwise, to invade their space, then slowly escalate, moving from some form of indifference to an ultimate life and death panic. Better examples, like funny games or knock knock are thoughtfully planned out to trap the normies logically, but that takes scriptwriting effort. 90 per cent plus are just lazy set ups to create situations that would culminate in either quick dismissal or confrontation. Or in case of the classic haunted house, a quick move. I nominate "inert observer", but I am sure there is better.