Amityville: Evil Never Dies

I don't recall seeing any scary clowns in this movie. I think there was one clown right at the beginning that didn't have anything to do with the story, what little there was of it. And that was about it. There was not a clownhouse full of clowns, and it certainly wasn't an Amityville house full of clowns. For that matter, it wasn't even an Amityville house. What in the world is going on here?

Okay ... let's suss this out. The title of the movie is "Amityville Clownhouse." I've got that much. So, to wit ...

1. In a Clownhouse, you would expect a house that is full of clowns. Furthermore, being a movie that is labeled a "Horror" movie, you would expect a house full of murderous clowns with terrifying makeup, similar to the clown on the poster. Right? Well ... wrong. That is not in this movie. There is no clownhouse, and there are no terrifying clowns. Basically, there are NO clowns to speak of.

2. In an Amityville movie, you would expect and Amityville-looking house, buuuuut ... NO! You would be wrong. There is no Amityville house at all. And the house that IS there does not have clowns in it, so not only is it NOT a clownhouse, as previously mentioned, but it is not even an Amityville house, so the title is a big, old misdirection.

In conclusion, I honestly don't know what this is supposed to be, but it isn't what the title says it is by one iota. What I would have named it is ... "Boring, Terribly Directed & Acted Waste of Time." That would have been entirely accurate. Too bad, too, because something really cool could have been made from that title alone. What a shame. What a darn shame. :(

Several years after an unfortunate accident, a couple determined to move on with their lives finds that the increase of hostility on his end comes from an evil entity housed inside a cursed antique toy monkey that was initial bought at the original Amityville house and must find a way to break its influence over him.

This was a rather solid and enjoyable genre effort. Among the more enjoyable features here is the rather enjoyable setup that brings trouble to the couple. After the initial attacks at the old house and how they inadvertently buy the cursed monkey toy, the resulting scenes of them coming under strange occurrences are a great touch to add some suspense to things. From his sudden nightmares and cold behavior to her inability to get the psychic flashes out of her mind of the old house, the setup to what's going on is a perfectly serviceable setup that has a nice connection built up here with the toy's influence on their lives. As well, there's the fun that comes from the supernatural exploits present. With the strong opening of the father in clown-makeup blowing away the family during the birthday party giving a great idea of what's in store here, The rest of the scenes are quite fun, including the spirits killing the lookers in somewhat chilling and graphic encounters, the flashing-red lit sequences of him under the influence killing the prostitute and later beating on his wife or a later ambush on a visiting neighbor. A fine finale detailing the battle with the creatures is somewhat brief but still works nicely with the bizarre flash images of the demons and the deranged images at play during the scene. The other great factor here is a nice bit of building a psychological change that begins affecting him as the film attempts the idea of him being influenced into acting out-of-character, much like the characters from the other entries. While it seems illogical to wait as long as possible without doing anything, especially with how he acts during these scenes of berating her and even getting physical, there's some fun work here involving these scenes furthering the possessed doll nicely. The few scenes where it suffers from its low-budget limitations including some padding and a few glimpses of the limiting effects do bring this down somewhat, but not enough.

Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Language, Graphic Violence, and Brief Nudity.

This movie made me dumber watching it and it gave me eye cancer

If you want an hour and 13 minutes of you life gone for good this is the movie for you while it is very fun to make fun of I could not look away would recommend to someone if they were mentally handicapped or looking for a bad movie to watch 10/10 would watch again

Dustin Ferguson makes about a dozen movies a year, which seems really impressive until you actually watch one of them. It's tough to call what he does filmmaking. He basically sells footage to bottom feeders like Tubi. He turns on his consumer-grade camera and mostly just points it at stuff. I can't imagine this movie even had a script. There's a very rough outline and the actors just kinda figure things out as it goes along. That worked really well for "Blair Witch". This isn't "Blair Witch".

Low-budget movies usually tend to waste some time. Cheap horror movies that are all killer no filler are few and far between. Not everyone has the talent or resources to make the new "Evil Dead", and we accept that. Sometimes a walking/driving scene can go on for way too long in a thinly-veiled attempt to boost the running time, and we just kinda smile. That's fair. However, I don't think I've ever seen someone pad the running time so cynically and blatantly. "Amityville: Evil Never Dies" starts with two scenes that were clearly shot for a different movie, has the slowest credit sequences in cinema (ahum) history and gives us riveting scenes like a character walking to a park, sitting on a bench, making a drawing and walking back home. Of course the drawing or the park have absolutely no bearing on the plot, what a silly thing to ask. What do you think this is, a movie?

Granted, this is nothing new. While Ferguson himself claims inspirations by Wes Craven and Tobe Hooper, in reality he's much more related to Jerry Warren. Warren was a prolific director in the 50s and 60s, but basically all he did was buy up obscure foreign films, chop them up, add just a bare minimum of footage with American actors and pretend it was a coherent movie. Much like Ferguson, he churned out products with no regard for quality or entertainment value. The main difference between Warren and Ferguson is that Warren was brutally honest about this in interviews. He knew he was a glorified con artist and never tried to convince us he was trying to make the new "Texas Chain Saw Massacre". Ferguson doesn't even give us that courtesy and tries to convince us he's making homages to his favorite movies. If you're making me defend Jerry Warren, you may not be very good at your job.

The most bothersome thing about productions like this is how they make it increasingly difficult to find a diamond in the rough. There are (probably) some promising directors out there who try to get a head start with a micro-budget horror flick, much like Sam Raimi or Peter Jackson did before them. I want to see these movies, but they're between hundreds of films by people who don't give a damn and are there for a quick buck. Even video stores, notorious for how much crap they had on the shelves, had much better ratios than that. If you genuinely love horror movies, for the love of God don't make them look like this. It's just going to turn people away from giving micro-budget horror a chance.