Tarnation

Haven't laughed this much in ages. Totally mental film very funny. Great horror comedy done on tiny budget. Sure it steals from many well known movies but the flying unicorn woman is worth the price of admission!!

So you self a favour ignore the bad reviews sit back and enjoy

So, let me start by saying I will watch this whole movie than update as and if needed. I love cheesy cheeky horror films I truely do. My partner refuses to look at my streaming accounts due to the amount I watch, thus the reason why this title showed up.

With that said let me give my review based on the first 3 minutes .. yes, the first three minutes of this movie.

The opening scene is what I assume is "the cabin". I am already confused by this screen and wondering what they are trying to say by this. It appears to be dusk or maybe later. The cabin and trees are brightly light with flood lights. I can't tell if it's supposed to be day or night. Then suddenly, the durt burst open and the heroin runs though the door as two men in shrouds chasing after her though the woods.

She quicky darts and zigzags back and forth, panting and sobbing. Then as the two people catche her, and I think "oh no! She's done for!?" But no! She bust her Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon moves! I again have many questions at this point. Why is she scared? Who is she? How did they catch her if she is so good?

After several round house kicks, dodging attacks like Neo from The Matrix she finishes the last dude with her Kamehameha Elbow Drop.

As I am sitting here befuttled I notice the subtitles have her titled as "Kung Fu Virgin" Okay.... Next thing I know she is spilling her blood on what appers to be a book.. again questions. Where did this book come from?

Then a black CGI death Unicron from what looks like a 12 year olds 1980 Mac computer shows up and stabs her with it's horn and bamn.... 3 minutes of my life gone with me left wondering what just happened.

So yeah, enjoy the movie because I'm unsure what's happening in my life right now.

I didn't even know what this movie was about prior to sitting down to watch it, only that it was supposedly a horror movie.

Well, this was a low budget movie in every aspect of that term; from the cheesy special effects, to the acting and to the production level. Now, you might wonder if it was bad enough to actually be entertaining and watchable. Nope. Let me just clear that right up; it wasn't!

I managed to endure about 15 minutes of this movie before I gave up. It was just unfathomably boring and lacked production value to be appealing to me.

The acting in the movie was every bit as expected for a movie such as this. The plus side here was that it was all unfamiliar faces on the screen.

I am not going to be returning to watch more of "Tarnation", as the movie had absolutely no appeal to me in any way.

This was a cringe fest and i love horror movies...just stop

This is so bad, it's not even worth joking about. Lady runs out of house in panic 2 guys chase her in monk clothing 2 guys catch up to her and she becomes like Bruce Lee and takes them down (why did she run in the first place with such fear on her face if she had those mad skills?) So obvious the punches and kicks weren't landing, maybe the director saw movies like this where we believe they were being hit and thought it was easy to replicate. She starts chanting. A ridiculous cheap prop of a black unicorn comes out and stabs her with her horn in a very obvious "on the side"fake out. I am done.

I AM WRONG if this scene turns out to be some professor in college showing the class how not to make a movie, but I think this was actually an attempt to have a compelling introduction.

I think there should be some child labor investigation because this seems to be made by a bunch of kids in 2nd grade.