The Northlander

OMG what was that all about? Someone should tell Benjamin that there is a big difference between being deep and being obtuse. It's bad enough that the acting is so stilted, but honestly, the story line is non-existent. My theory is that a group of first-year film students got lost in the badlands with nothing but a bag of drugs and a camera stuck in slow motion mode. I saw this movie with a large group of people,and afterwards everyone had lots of compliments for the scenery, the props, the costumes, even the stunt performers... but not one of them could tell me what the story was about, whether the movie had any kind of point to make, or why anyone would bother to produce this kind of self-indulgent garbage. Do not waste your time watching this movie.

I was amused by the diversity in ratings: 7.5 average from supposedly 500+ people. But only eight reviews? Six of those (evidently the honest ones) are very negative and all state the same thing: no comprehensible plot line. The other two reviews, both praising the film, are in the same chopped-English. Bogus positive reviews? Bogus ratings? Obviously so. First, a good movie doesn't get 500 ratings and only 8 reviews. Second, the chopped-English positive reviews make it pretty evident they were bought (or from foreign members of the crew). Result: I have better things to do with my time than watch an obviously scammed film.

Bad acting, production, videography and sound... such a terrible waste of time. There's absolutely no way this POS has such a high rating other than fake reviews. The entire production crew must have been employed to create accounts and give fake high star ratings. Don't believe the fake reviews!

Pretty much the worst thing I've ever seen. I feel like this movie was written by creatures that were not human, communicating to their occult group. I still don't understand what I just watched. Felt like there was a hidden message deep in the symbols that were displayed in the movie. If ever there was a movie for the Archons, this is it. Not sure how this got ranked an 8.6... IMDb first time you've let me down. I still have love IMDb, 100% forgiveness for this epic disaster. No hate here, just a horrible movie that needs to be ignored by humans.

I enjoyed the scenery and some of the costumes. I also like that the actors were all slightly over weight (or normal) looking. You don't see that often in film, everyone is usually super fit.

I usually do not bother watching a movie with less than 60% on IMDb, in fact nearer to 70%, but I am a sucker for anything set in the future. I guess I am going to have to be stricter about this.

I find myself asking "how can this happen"? Quite how 900 people got this movie to 59% (at the time of writing) is beyond me. Is there some new way for studios to leave fake reviews on IMDb? This movie is SO SLOW it might as well be in slow motion.

It is actually painful to sit through, practically plot less, the acting is dire and there nothing here for anyone. Even the fight scenes look like badly rehearsed wrestling from the 1970's.

Some movies leave you wanting those 2 hours of your life back, but others make you determined to just forget it. This one only lasts 83 minutes but it feels like 5 hours! I gave it a couple of days and tried again, sadly it was just as bad.

The reason I felt compelled to come and leave you this review is so that you might at least be saved from watching this terrible movie. It is too late for me, but not for you, choose something else!! I love movies and will give almost any a go but this is complete tripe.

I guess that from now on I will have to wait until tens of thousands have voted if I am to trust IMDb scores.