Darkness Rising

Hilarious! A work of comedic genius! You'll laugh out loud! Wait....what? This is supposed to be a horror movie? Oh. Well. Uh....yeah. This is a terrible horror movie, but the awful acting and nonsensical circumstances will probably make you laugh so....it's got that going for it, which is nice. (gunga-gunga-gulanga)

This movie was a struggle to sit through. Before i continue I want to make it clear i'm not gonna trash this movie for the heck of it, i'm usually pretty good at giving movies the benefit of the doubt (I watched "The last air bender" 3 times). I have watched a lot of horror movies, some good, some bad. This was without a doubt one of the worst ones yet.

The story was bad, the acting was bad, the script was bad, the cinematography was bad, the props were bad and, the special effects were bad.

Darkness rising had a total of 2 scary/Creepy scenes with a combined length of 45 seconds (and that's generous). There are so many of the plot devices that just goes unexplained, most of them actually. They try to explain it towards the end of the movie but fail horribly, partly because the acting and script is so bad it's hard to actually listen. Oh, and i have never seen a weaker character in any other movie, about 30-40 min into it, the main character, Madison, starts to cry and LITERALLY does not stop for the next 45 min, every line she has is said crying and she is basically helpless and just screams for her boyfriend, Jake, to help her and the ONE time he asks for her help, she hides (while crying).

Frankly the only good thing about Darkness rising was the credits, great roll speed, great font and font size, great spacing and fantastic spelling.

Please do not waste time and money on this.

When the legend that is Ted Raimi appeared on screen after the opening credits I was awash with a feeling that I was about to watch something good. Sadly however it was not meant to be and I was presented with this realisation within no more than 15 minutes.

You know those over-convoluted horrors which make the rules up as they go along, make no real sense and are generally pretty damn appalling? This is one of those.

A girl returns to her childhood home with her friends, the home where her mother went crazy and tried to kill her when she was a child. Then spooky things begin to go on around the house and it all gets bad, but more for the viewer for the trio.

Messy unlikeable tripe.

The Good:

Looks the part

The Bad:

Makes no sense

Why do the characters keep repeating themselves?

Things I learnt from this movie:

Nothing, in fact if anything I lost brain cells

The scariest thing about this movie is that people actually edited it and thought it was fit for the human public. A horror movie does not have to have a huge budget but I would think that when it comes to the actors the purse strings shouldn't be so tight. Where in tarnation did they get the Madison character? My cat could have put on a better performance. For most of the movie she did this awful sobbing voice whine for about 85% of the movie. Someone mentioned her awful portrayal of a limp and they were spot on, it was like she thought she was doing improv or something. I cant believe her bio states that she went to a performing arts school? The dog in the movie was more convincing than her. The script only made matters worse. Was the writer under character limits? Many lines in the movie were repeated several times in many scenes, I had the captions on so I literally could see that the script was full of the actors repeating themselves and with the same awful intonations each time. The plot is so stupid and could have been forgiven id the movie had hired writers and real actors instead of their neighbors.

I am very much upset I picked this out to watch on my night off. tsk tsk,

Nearly murdered as a child by her mother, a woman (Katrina Law) returns to the (now abandoned) house where her mom went mad.

On its face, the story is relatively simple and minimalistic. A group of three friends break into a house that one of them grew up in, and find that even twenty years later some of the things left behind are intact. Which may seem a bit far-fetched in a world full of urban spelunkers, but just go with it. Underneath this though, is a far more interesting concept.

We are presented the idea that there could be such a thing as architecture-induced homicide. Rather than a house being haunted by spirits, the building itself causes those inside to go insane by the very way it was constructed. Strictly speaking, this is not a new idea. No less a figure than Lovecraft pursued this line of thinking with his "non-Euclidean geometry", and a connection between architecture and evil is suggested in "Ghostbusters II" (itself influenced by Lovecraft). Yet, this remains a rare plot point, and the writer deserves praise merely for attempting it.

The effects are minor, but for the most part well done. There are some decent makeup effects on certain characters' eyes and faces that come across as being simple but quite effective. Maybe not KNB quality, but still better than anything Full Moon has made in the past decade or so. The hazy flashback camera effect is less effective, but if that is the worst that can be said about the film, it still gets a strong passing grade.

The inclusion of Ted Raimi, by far the biggest name attached, is interesting in itself. Based on his absence from IMDb during production, and the way he does not interact with the other characters, it would appear he was added after the rest of the film was completed. Possibly his voice was even dubbed over another actor's at some point. Which is not to say this is a bad thing… if you have the opportunity to put Ted Raimi in your film, you put Ted Raimi in your film. (Speaking with Raimi, he confirms that he was the last one hired and did the role as a favor to his friend Austin reading, the director.)

Overall, the film is fairly strong. There are a few shortcomings as one might expect from a lower budgeted horror picture, but the cleverness of the script overcomes this hurdle. "Darkness Rising" is out now from IFC Films.