northernpaladin

This film reeks of desperation and a need to be relevant. Jerry Bruckheimer desperate to be relevant again as a blockbuster producer but still just a pedlar of empty spectacle which this most certainly is. Brad Pitt desperate to be relevant as a handsome leading man and taken seriously, his last decent effort was Ad Astra in 2019 and the shine has definitely worn thin. Javier Bardem who was last relevant in 2021's Being The Ricardo's and who is just one of those acceptable Hispanic clichés ready to take any pay cheque. Hans Zimmer stopped being relevant quite a few film scores ago and the generic braying sound delivered here could have come from anybody. The plot is simplistic and stupid, failing F1 race team managed by Bardem hires old former F1 burn out, Pitt, to partner with young, arrogant hot shot driver, Damson Idris, to save the season. Along the way we have clashes of testosterone, sage wisdom, clichéd reflection on life, a woeful dalliance between Pitt and Kerry Condon - funny how in film a 20+ age difference between characters (and the actors) is fine yet out in the real world it's a massive problem, a ridiculous boardroom financial power struggle and more car crashes in half a season of racing that the real past 5 years. Nothing works in this overlong mess, everything to do with F1 is wrong, not one piece of the portrayal of the team or the sport is right. There is zero chemistry between any of the principal players, they could literally have been on different sound stages, and this compounded by an inane script and empty character development. The direction by Joseph Kosinski is just like his hit Top Gun Maverick, a series of loud set pieces stitched together with thin plot lines. At the end I felt nothing for any of the characters, Damson Idris's 'JP' was as insufferable as he was at the start, Pitt's old hand was still an unbelievable joke, nobody else developed at all. Amazingly the film made decent box office but I have no idea why, audiences must be just as desperate as the makers. Don't pay good money for this and if it is on your streaming service watch something else.

There is neither rhyme nor reason to this wandering mess and quite why Roth or Lowden are in it I cannot work out, it can't have been for the money! Most betrayal and revenge movies have some kind of moral point or at least motivation but this has none, even the two characters we are notionally meant to root for are thieves and the cause of the ensuing murder. The acting is generally wooden, the direction all over the place and the continuity woeful - just how did the gold get in the tree? As for mood, well occasionally this works but not consistently and there is no way this is 1790 Scotland or 1790 anywhere! Oh, and the final showdown you spent 90 minutes waiting for? Don't bother.

No really. Absolute, mind numbing, brain rotting garbage that's not even worth watching while you do something else. Kevin James has never really been funny and in this he is just embarrassing while Ritchson demonstrates he is just a one trick pony and anyone who watched season 3 of Reacher knows he is all out of tricks. Plot? Well there isn't one really; tried hard/looser step dad (James) and his son meet up with perfect dad (Ritchson) and his off spring and a bond is formed amid a revolving door of stupid security contractors, a high tech millionaire and child clones - it even sounds stupid as I type it. The set pieces are weak, the gags excruciating and the pacing is all over the place. I gave it an hour, which was way more than it deserved, and then turned it off. Please don't watch, even if you are an Amazon subscriber like me whose subscription is being wasted on this crap, find something else to do.