The Disappearance of Lenka Wood

I didn't expect much from this film and unfortunately I was right in doing do.

The story is quite poor which makes it very easy to figure out the connection between the characters and therefore most of the plot/twist long before it is revealed.

The stereotyping is just appalling, almost about as bad as in the movie Midnight Express that was mentioned in the movie; the Turkish "bad-guys" were either pictured as steroid eating muscle bulging mountains or sly and cowardice rats.

I can't really go into the moral issue of the story without ruining the (attempt of a) plot, but I can say that it didn't make up for all the other awful aspects of the movie.

As a final remark, Mark O'Neal is about as good an actor as an average couch potato sports fan is at being one of the elite athlete he/she's watching. Just awful to watch.

If you like action, you may like this film, the hero - or is he? - is a US soldier/special agent who could give James Bond and Arnold Schwazenegger a run for their money and then some. He and his future wife decide to take their honeymoon before tying the knot, and she chooses Turkey where she is abducted while he finds himself accused of her murder.

Apart from the brutality of the police - three of whom are no match for him - Turkey sounds like a fun place to live. Even a humble barman has a palatial home, everybody speaks English, and there is a nice quiet toilet in the discotheque where you can torture and murder a police gopher, after you've drowned the barman in his swimming pool.

There is a twist in the final scene that gives the game away, this is not so much an action film as a political statement, but the long, circuitous route taken to make it beggars belief.

I don't think I have the words in my vocabulary to convey how terrible this movie is. Stilted, overwrought, contrived -- even these words fall short of describing the amateurish drivel that is the screenplay for The Disappearance of Lenka Wood.

Maybe it's best to let the film speak for itself. Here is an excerpt from the second act:

Army Guy: Next time, I'll cut your leg open. Then you'll have three wounds, and only two hands. You get to choose which one stays open.

Corrupt Cop: please, ill tell you where she's being kept

Army Guy: write it down for me

Corrupt Cop: I don't have a pen!

Army Guy: You can use your own blood!

Very cheap produced film with some interesting parts in storytelling but the twist at the end didn't make any sense 7f you think about it a bit. Why is she lying tortured in her cell fully involved in the plan to revenge the dead of her husband? Didn't make any sense! The performances are mediocre, sometimes a bit less. A better director, a more logical script and better cast and higher production level would this make better. Lenka Wood sounds like a place where you would have to fight giant spiders in The Witcher. I'm pretty sure the number one thing a thriller movie is supposed to be is thrilling, somebody should have told the director that. Solid ending for such a bad movie though.

I expected this to be a poor movie, but it was worse than poor. According to IMDb the budget was $1.5 million but if that's the case, $1.49 million was spent on catering I think. A few things without giving away the movie to clue you in.

1 - There are guys carrying assault rifles, but they have shotgun shells around their waist.

2 - There is a rich woman with bodyguards and a chauffeur. She is being driven around in her ultra high-end $17k Hyundai Elantra.

3 - Think of the worst karaoke singer you have ever heard in your life. Well, the best actor in this move has less acting skills than that person did singing.

I must admit, I was not able to make I through the movie, it was just too terrible.