A Ilha da Fantasia

Never saw the original show but this was a nightmare of a film and I mean that in a bad way. A bit like KNIVES OUT in terms of set-up but then turning into a turgid mess with a lot of mystery, some random action scenes, and a lot of tiresome fantasy stuff. I didn't like the characters, didn't buy their motivations, and found the whole thing increasingly silly as it went on, a bit like LOST for the 2020s. The only good part was Michael Rooker's action man role.

You know Oscar season is well and truly over when a film like Fantasy Island is dropped into cinemas, ready to remind audiences that too much of a good thing is a bad thing. No, I'm not talking about the fantasies turned nightmares at the centre of the film, but rather the need for films like Fantasy Island to remind audiences what constitutes a good film to begin with.

At the top of that list should be a coherent storyline, something which Fantasy Island didn't seem able to budget into its meagre $7 million price-tag. What begins as a fun B-grade horror/thriller quickly descends into abject nonsense, with a last act that will either have you howling in laughter or utter disbelief... or both. It's like the studio decided to take the supernatural elements from Lost, but forgot to bring the nuance, depth or philosophical pretence that made that show (mostly) work. Or they just hired the guys who wrote Truth or Dare.

Full disclosure, I have never seen an episode of the same-titled 70's show upon which the film is based on. Maybe those who find the show a guilty pleasure will be more forgiving of the film's utter nonsense. But, if there's one thing they are less likely to forgive is the film's treatment of an iconic character. Contrary to reports, "Tattoo" is in the film, but after watching it you'd probably prefer he wasn't.

Why is it we keep having these tired and convoluted attempts to recreate great movies and series from yesteryear instead of creative and original attempts at something new; its very sad if this is the state of affairs and there are no writers left or directors who can make something great when there are so many possibilities in comics like 2000AD or Tornado or Starlord from the 80's if they cannot come up with original writers and forsake truly modern and creative directors like Neill Blomkamp directing shorts and commercials.

How was it possible in the 60,70,80's and even 90's we had original movies with good stories and direction from greats like Carpenter, Ridley and we end up with turgid efforts like this, it is very sad for the movie industry if this is what we are left with, very sad indeed.

The original was a classic and nobody could replace Ricardo Montalban or even Tattoo so why try?

Pointless remake with such a deeply contrived storyline that it beggars belief they thought audiences would fall for it. No just NO!

Oscar worthy? No. But, if you're in the mood for a nice, fun comedy, action, thriller... it is A-OK. Has a couple of twists. Keeps you wondering where its going. If the plot gets a little sketchy here and there, have some more popcorn and give it a bit!

I enjoyed it more than many higher rated, more pumped movies I've seen lately! Grab ya a bucket, a nice beverage and have a little fun with this one!

Granted, I was lured in by the promise of the movie's poster, the fact that it was labeled as a horror movie, plus that Michael Peña and Maggie Q was on the cast list.

Little did I know what I was in for actually. Turns out that this movie was a mess of a storyline. The character gallery was for the most part a very flaccid and pointless one, to be bluntly honest. And that gave the actors and actresses very little to work with. And it didn't help that the storyline written by Jillian Jacobs, Christopher Roach and Jeff Wadlow seemed like they were individually told to write something on a concept without talking and sparring together. It was just a mess and a pain to sit through, literally.

Not even the performances of Michael Peña, Maggie Q or Michael Rooker could do much to lift up this train wreck of a movie.

I managed to sit through the movie in its entire length, but I must admit that my attention was failing the things that happened on the screen. The storyline was just way too clumsy and incoherent to catch my attention.

It should be said that some of the visuals in the movie were actually good, but that could only do so much to salvage the rest of the movie.

While I suffered through the entire movie, I can now check it off of my watched movie list and I know for a fact that I will never be returning to watch this 2020 movie again - ever.

My rating of "Fantasy Island" lands on a very generous three out of ten stars. And I put it on three solely because of Michael Peña and Maggie Q, truth be told.