Wedding Belles

Irvine Welsh. Where would he be without Trainspotting? No-where. He'd be an unpublished writer working in a bar. This awful attempt to write female roles is so clichéd and embarrassing that Mr Welsh should do the literary world a huge favour and go away.

Of course he's not the only writer credited for this inept script, but it has Welsh's grubby fingerprints all over it - unfunny farce, 'Allo-Allo style erotica, clichéd misanthropy, and his trademark nowhere-to-go ending! The fact that this has come out on DVD the day after being screened on TV is blind & ludicrous by the powers that be at CH4 who sanctioned this drivel in the first place. Who is going to buy this? If you watched it, you would never consider buying it. If you haven't seen it, surely you'll wait for the endless repeats on More4 or E4 - and then switch off within the hour. I'm not even going to talk about the plot-less plot. This is about Welsh. A one-hit wonder who has made enough money to respect his loyal audience and stop inflicting this unfunny lazy work upon them. 1 out of 10 for the hapless actresses who try & fail.

Before starting the review I must say that if you are offended by swearing, drug use, necrophilia, violence, references to bestiality, more swearing, a priest receiving oral sex from a woman dressed as a nun, the use of derogatory terms for people suffering from mental illness or even more swearing then this probably isn't the film for you, if however you aren't easily offended and you like your comedy fairly dark then you may love this, I know I did.

Having enjoyed "Trainspotting" when I saw adverts for a new television film written by Irvine Welsh I just had to see it and when I did see it I enjoyed it so much I had to get the DVD as soon as it was released. Unlike his earlier film this film follows the lives of four women, the men in it are distinctly secondary characters. It opens with a bang as four women dressed in bridal gowns go to a grave yard and dig up a corpse before rounding up a teenage joy-rider, a Catholic priest and a Welshman who the take to a canal-side and shoot each of them. We then go back a week and see the events that lead up to these four women wanting to kill these four men.

Amanda, played by Michelle Gomez is looking forward to marrying her fiancé, a Welsh pilot who appears to have no major vices. Kelly, played by the excellent Shirley Henderson, is helping Amanda by doing her community service punishment for her at the local mental hospital, unfortunately Kelly isn't a hairdresser like Amanda so her attempts at cutting a patient's hair go disastrously wrong. Rhona, played by Shauna Macdonald, is having problems at her job in an old people's home after supplying an elderly gentleman with Viagra and is having an affair with a Catholic priest. Finally there is Shaz, played by Kathleen McDermott, who has turned to drugs following the death of her fiancé in a crash caused by a joy-rider.

The earlier part of the film is laugh out loud funny in particular the scene at the "saints and sinners" fancy dress party where Kelly is dressed as a Nazi and Rhona beats the living daylights out of a man while dressed as a nun. The comedy is however tinged with tragedy and by the end when we learnt Kelly's story I was almost in tears. I've avoided mentioning the funniest scenes as I'd hate to spoil the "I can't believe they did that" reactions they may cause.

If you liked "Trainspotting" I'd recommend this while I don't think the writing was as sharp here it is still great film with more laughs than his earlier work. The acting from the four leading ladies is very good, I particularly liked Shirley Henderson in her role as Kelly, but then she is always good.

For anyone who likes their films hard and fast and hilarious and sexy and rock n rolling, well look no further. Irvine Welsh and Dean Cavanagh have turned in an amazing script that is taken to another level with magical direction by Philip John and outstanding performances from Gomez, Henderson, McDermott and McDonald. It quite literally burns off of the screen. The soundtrack is awesome.

I'd be astounded if Wedding Belles didn't become a series. There has been talk of it in the media but no news as yet. Wedding Belles blows the usual rubbish like Skins and Goldplated and Shameless out of the water. It was a genuine joy to see something so original and exciting coming out of the UK.

I hope the BAFTA judges watched it because Henderson and Gomez deserve best TV actresses by a long mile.

A great film, well worth watch a great writing duo on the rise. Watch this space. The film moves with pace, and determination. You are not allowed to catch your breath, until the commercial breaks.

A great break away from the Bridget Jones cliché of women. The film takes you on a journey of mayhem, madness and mischief, yet the bond between the four lasses overrides any conflicts they face from the outside world. They are as thick as thieves. It's so nice to feel an deep empathy for the central characters.

The sound track fits the pace of the film perfectly. Moreover I was amused that certain tabloids went on the moral high ground, over certain scenes that they felt were offensive. Newspapers that insist on exploiting women to sell their papers, a classic case of calling of the pot calling the kettle black.

I can't wait for Irvine Welsh's and Dean Cavanagh's next feature, are they the new Galton & Simpson ?

Funny, sad, sexy and scathing. Quite simply an amazing achievement. After being subjected to second rate pedestrian period drama's and lacklustre so called "contemporary" drivel from British TV over the last few years, "Wedding Belles" shot out of the left field and gave me hope in the future of UK broadcasting.

Besides the beautiful photography, the rip roaring soundtrack, the "not an ounce of fat" editing and of course the fantastic chemistry of the cast, here was a script that nailed its mission statement on the mast from the get-go. It went where asbestos booted angels fear to tread.

The whole film felt and looked "authored", something we very rarely - if ever- see from UK productions nowadays. Dean Cavanagh and Irvine Welsh were obviously left to really take their imaginations into overdrive. What we ended up with was "hyper reality" but reality all the same. For all the shocking scenes they never once took us so far away from a veracity.

Being an exiled American I did have a problem understanding the accents and watched with subtitles. This didn't detract from the sheer joy it, in fact, imagining the subtitlers translating it just added to the humour for me.

I watch most of my TV on boxsets and I'd love to see a season of "Wedding Belles". It made me want to visit Edinburgh week in week out and catch up with these larger than life characters.

Truly an outstanding piece of TV worthy of awards.