A Casa do Mal

I have a game. I believe I can find something interesting even intriguing in any film. This one tests me sorely because everything about the film itself is completely without merit. The only interesting thing is Jeanne Tripplehorn's presence. What a fall from grace! She was in one of the decade's blockbusters `Basic Instinct.'

In that, she was both attractive and showed some real acting promise. Not great, but promising. Rather like Ms Jolie or Theron at the time of this writing. She was also in the decade's hugest bomb, where her performance was harmoniously bad. How uneven a career. She was a strong harridan in the clever `Sliding Doors.' but helped `Mickey Blue Eyes' tank. "Till There Was You" was weakened by her. Now she shows up in a TV level piece of tripe. She could have saved this for me, because she had the chorus role. But she just didn't have the stuff. Is it drugs? Is it just random ups and downs?

I have not seen her in `Timecode.' That promises to be an important film for me. Let's hope for the best.

My used VHS copy of "Paranoid" made an immediate bad impression. It is a bad sign when you pick up a used VHS and find that it has "not" been rewound from a point midway into the movie. There is a very good chance that the last viewer got so disgusted by that point that they just bailed out and traded the thing in without even bothering to fast forward to the ending. Bad impression #2 came when I discovered the poor audio quality and tried to activate the subtitles-the tape does not have this feature (nor does the DVD version). Subtitles are added after the final cut in post-production. They represent a modest additional expense so when they are missing from post-1996 movies it is because the producers were so unimpressed with the final product that they were already trying to cut their losses.

That said "Paranoid" is not as bad as most commentary would lead you to believe. This is a psychological thriller that borrows heavily from "Rear Window" and "The Collector". Unfortunately, the generally good cast is hampered by the limited talents of Jessica Alba, who not only looks the part of a fashion model, but exhibits the expected thespian skills of most fashion models (insert Kathy Ireland here).

Although the distributors promote the movie as if the title refers to Chloe's (Alba) mindset, it actually is a reference to main captor Stan's (Iain Glen) delusions. These pass for irony as his damage control measures transform a minor and easily concealed crime into a high stakes situation. Although we are told at one point that Stan's last name is Kowalski and wait patiently for him to scream "Stella", director John Duigan somehow resists the temptation to go there.

The just-under-the-surface depravity of the household is masked by the presence of a deaf child, nicely played by Mischa Barton. Barton gives a subtle non-verbal performance as the movie's only totally sympathetic character. Unfortunately, Duigan's script does not explore her motivations or how she has remained uncorrupted despite growing up in this environment. Instead the character is just an ethereal presence, helping to advance the story line but too distanced to really connect with the audience. Interestingly, when her parents "sign" to her they also say the words. Given the poor audio quality and inaudible dialogue it would have been useful for all the characters to "sign" their lines (after a few minutes of "Paranoid's" audio everyone can relate better to a deaf child).

Also helping to advance the story line is Kevin Whately who plays the Jimmy Stewart "Rear Window" character. He perfectly plays a voyeur who is the only one who genuinely cares for Chloe's wellbeing. He cares enough to risk exposure in order to save her. But in attempting to illustrate his binocular observations of Chloe's apartment the folks in post-production not only added the silly black circles around the binocular image but desaturated all the color from these views-duh! Duigan is such a poor storyteller and his direction so laid back that he does generate any tension or suspense. But "Paranoid" is more tiring than boring, as you have to stay focused and work hard just to decipher what is happening in each scene. There are simply too many characters here and they are too unconventional, Duigan does not come close to giving us even one fully developed character. A good director would have used behaviors to complement dialogue but Duigan is too focused on style to provide any substance.

The movie has good production design style and a fair number of nice visual moments. Like the unexpected and very sudden change in Chloe's situation when Stan slips the handcuffs on her wrist. And later when Gordon (Ewen Bremer) seemingly brings a tray of toast to the handcuffed Chloe and then casually eats it himself without even offering it to her.

Even if you can follow what is supposed to be the final twist (Chloe's photographer boyfriend is the obsessive phone caller but Duigan's slips this revelation in so poorly that few will comprehend what he is showing), you just don't care because there so little character development or foreshadowing that it has no emotional impact.

It all just seems a bit formulaic. These days unless you have a completely fresh idea (which this wasn't) then you have to add something on (which this doesn't), otherwise you're just making the same movie with different actors. I liked the idea to take the story away from America which gave it that "you're along way from home" spooky, kind of feeling. But I feel they sacrificed good acting for this which is a shame because if they could've combined both I'm sure it would have been slightly more successful.

None the less it's not all bad. For Jessica Alba fans it'll be easier to sit through than some of her other duller movies. And for everyone else, well maybe there's something there for people who enjoy spooky type endings, but if not, there are definitely other ones out there to see before this.

This is one of the worst "movies" you'll ever see. There is a very good reason that it went straight to video, because it's just plain awful. I wouldn't recommend this to someone I really hated, I don't hate anyone that badly. The story is as terrible as the directing, and only the acting is worse. Alba is just awful here and will set new lows in movie performances that will make Luke Skywalker look like a god. The movie's plot isn't worth mentioning because after the first few minutes you won't care. It's about 90 minutes but seems like the Titanic revisited. Don't see this for Alba, just don't see it and do yourself a favor.

Alba fans be warned: This review contains the odd spoiler.

Jessica, Jessica, Jessica... (sigh). Those almond-shaped eyes, pillowy lips, wavy dark hair, strokeable olive skin, utterly perfect body, cute speaking voice, tight flawless behind... Like Cindy Crawford, Rosanna Arquette and Mariah Carey, Jessica Alba is one of those women who occupies a very special place in my affections. If only "Paranoid" was as appealing as she is.

Made by Sky Pictures (and sad proof that Sky is not the HBO of Britain), John Duigan's thrill-less thriller casts the gorgeous and sexy Jessica as an American model doing some work in London, who's plagued by a stalker, on good terms with her ex, and is persuaded to spend some time at a friend's house in the country, only to find that said house is seemingly entirely populated by weirdos (Iain Glen, Ewen Bremner, Jeanne Tripplehorn etc). The only interesting aspect of the movie not related to Miss Alba's charms is that our heroine is perpetually surrounded by weirdos even when she doesn't know it.

SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT!

Her flat in London is spied on by a neighbour (Kevin Whately) who, though basically a stalker (he found her address book and thus started to be fascinated by her), is ultimately the one who rescues her from death in the end. Unfortunately they never meet, thereby denying us the closest thing we'll get to a "Dark Angel"/"Inspector Morse" crossover. But the last scene (revealing the identity of the phantom phone caller) indicates the poor girl still has her share of creeps in her life, without even knowing it.

WE NOW RETURN TO OUR REVIEW, STILL IN PROGRESS.

"Paranoid" does occasionally successfully conjure up an edgy, pervy atmosphere, and the cast does try their best, but the low budget and the off-key writing and directing from Duigan (on unfamiliar territory here, literally because he's Australian and figuratively considering his far superior dramas "The Year My Voice Broke," "Flirting" and "Sirens") defuse any impact. Jessica's performance is even more sullen and depressed than her character is supposed to be... and her lack of energy is certainly shared by the viewer. (Why she and Jeanne Tripplehorn were in this movie is beyond me. In fact, why ANYONE was in it is beyond me.) Unexciting and occasionally unpleasant, anti-Murdoch advocates ("See the kind of tosh Rupert puts out?"), Kevin Whately devotees and die-hard Alba fans are the only ones who need apply.

By the way, note the mocked-up "FHM" cover that she appears on at one point. Jessica has never done the famed lad mag in real life, an oversight I demand be corrected forthwith.