We're Talkin' Serious Money

I've seen a lot of bad movies in my time, but nowhere else have I seen such an incompetent mob movie. Can you imagine a mobster movie - these things involve lots of shootings and lots of catch lines by definition - where a)No shooting happens at all until the end, and b)The whole movie is built around $10,000. That's how much the characters seek, and probably the total production cost of the movie. Lots of pointless chatter, but has neither muscle (listed above) or brains. Watch it if you want to see the worst mobster flick of all time, or if you need a cure for insomnia.

My review was written in January 1993 after watching the movie on Columbia TriStar video cassette.

This pleasant comedy about a pair of small-time operators got overlooked in the distribution wars when it was released theatrically last spring, but is well worth a look.

It's the brainchild of actor Leo Rossi, most familiar from his roles in Jonathan Kaplan pics like "The Accused" and "Heart Like a Wheel". As co-writer/co-producer he's made amusing roles for himself and Dennis Farina as Italian-American bumblers.

Farina concocts a scheme to steal bearer bonds and lets his best pal Rossi in on the deal. Borrowing front money from local tough guy Gino the Grocer (John La Motta), the duo proceed to bungle the job and have to flee New York for Los Angeles.

There they accidentally become involved in a blackmail scam involving old buddy Marty the Greek (John Kapelos). Though set in the world of crime, the film contrives a light, happy ending of Farina's vey Italian wedding.

What makes this work is the well-matched teaming of Farina, playing very straight as the dense member of the duo, and Rossi as the flaky hothead. They give a fresh look to the overworked of late Italian crime milieu.

Supporting cast is well-chosen for ethnic credibility, including brassy leading lady Fran Drescher.

Victor McLagen and John Carradine for a long time held the record of starring in the most motion pictures, that is until DENNIS WOODRUFF came along and not only broke their records, but starred and appeared in more than their appearances combined. Mention the name DENNIS WOODRUFF and even the extras know his name right away and his sterling reputation. Its a wonder he has not walked away with one or many Academy Awards for his fine acting and his great sense of comedy. I've been on the bus and have heard bus drivers comment as they passed the place he lived at, saying: "That is the home of DENNIS WOODRUFF and there is one of his famous vehicles!" Passengers would crane their necks to get a better view as the driver would slow down so they could all see where Dennis Woodruff resided. Sometimes you can see the great actor in Glendale at the coffee section of a well-known bookseller. This movie was a jewel and launched the careers of Dennis Farina, who greatly benefited from working with the great Dennis Woodruff. Sarge Booker (Dennis Woodruff fan)

Fran Drescher is the nagging beautician girlfriend of small time hood, Dennis Farina. After a series of failed get rich quick schemes, including St.Christopher medals with moving lips, Farina and his pal, Leo Rossi, embark on a bigger scam, only to run afoul of New York mobsters. Fleeing to Los Angeles, they stumble upon an incriminating video tape, which leads to extorting a million dollars from some local politicians. The film is extremely uneven. The scenes with Fran Drescher are probably the best part of "We're Talking Serious Money", plus one funny scene in a gay biker bar. All of which, almost makes sitting through this very average comedy tolerable. - MERK

I liked this movie because of Dennis Farina and Fran Drescher were in it, and it was before they became *really* famous..

I thought it was funny when Sid and Charlie had so much trouble climbing that ladder, but other than that, it was pretty much standard fare all the way...

I didn't hate it, and didn't fell asleep, but I didn't really paid much attention to it either.. so I would have to give it 5/10, see it if you don't have anything better to do.

Recommended for fans of poorly made movies with okay casts.