O Azarão

Is it because I am Old and Cheesy? Is it because I am a dyed in the wool Tom Waits fanatic? Or is it because the acting by Waits is nigh unto maniacal? The scene in the Stallion Registration Office will forever be etched on my brain. Any and all should see - nay, experience this movie.

The movie "cold feet" is a really lame, 1980's attempt at humour, wherein Tom Waits plays a murderer whom you're supposed to like. Because he cries, and plays with children. But, even his humourous ways and decent acting can't save this horrible, horrible movie. There are definitely some funny parts in this movie, but they're totally unintentional. Tom Waits fans can appreciate this, other than that... Nobody should see this movie. Ever.

Written by the tandem of Tom McGuane and Jim Harrison, this movie had fun written all over it from the start. Listen: Keith Carridine, Tom Waits, and Sally Kirkland hide some emeralds in a horse. The plot is to smuggle the emeralds into the US, kill the horse, and fence the emeralds.

Of course Carridine is the no-good brother of Bill Pullman, who ranches in Montana. And of course he doesn't want to kill the horse. And of course he double-crosses his partners.

That's it, really. Waits and Kirkland chase after him, and hijinks ensue.

Waits is particularly fun as Kenny, a sociopathic killer who thinks he's smarter than anyone else, and Carridine is just enough of a likable rogue that you can follow him through the movie without getting too angry with him. Add in Pullman (who appeared in just about every movie shot in Montana in the late '80s...my understanding is that he was teaching in either Bozeman or Missoula), and Rip Torn as the local sheriff, and you've got a fun, goofy movie that's harmless and has a truly inspired moment or three.

Worth a rent. Worth owning if you're a Tom Waits fan, as this is one of his more prominent roles.

Seven of ten.

As a reviewer who WAS ACTUALLY THERE in the 70s and 80s, I will confess upfront that I stumbled on this film being aired in 2015 on a speciality "nostalgia" channel -- a channel so obscure that even the people who advertise on it probably don't watch it.

But somehow I was caught up with this film, odd combination of eccentric characters and a wonderful landscape for their "road trip" ... and I was hooked. In fact, I felt positively .... nostalgic.

Tom Waits -- for those of you NOT of that era -- was not what you would call a prolific leading man. In fact, this film is the most face time I have ever seen him get. He mugs and mugs for the camera like he just escaped from a Starbucks, but the real star power in the film belongs to Carradine ("butter wouldn't melt in his mouth") and Kirkland.

Kirkland sort of made a living doing female characters that looked and acted like a mad scientist had run two entirely different women into a machine and only one came out. She may be an acquired taste -- especially for other women -- but you certainly cannot say she is stealing anyone else's act.

The rating is tricky. One of those films that either works for you ... or does not.

And great scenery. Won an award for the cinematography, in fact.

Some early footage of Bill Pullman.

And a great looking horse.

This started out as a great movie, but is a classic, classic case of an end-game botch job: The filmmakers simply could not figure out how to end this movie! It's *really* way, way too bad, because all the hard work setting things up deserved follow-through. I've never seen such a bold quality-related contrast in a movie.

I could almost recommend it in spite of this failure, simply because of the writing and character development. It's a fun movie in a number of ways.

I guess in the end I'll have to suggest you pass this one up.