O Barco do Sexo

I remember this to be one of or if not the first porno movies I ever saw , in the dawn of the VHS revolution this film was being swapped about my playground amongst the hormone ridden 13 year olds , eventually it landed in my greasy hands and I was "treated" to a hard core porno with comedy elements, think 'Some like it hot' where two guys sneak aboard a woman only ship dressed as women , as you can imagine , there are many sexual escapades , including an impressive one man on 5 women orgy , the film concludes with some pirates raping and pillaging, the raping is far from sinister as the women look like they are raping the pirates ! I have a soft spot (or hard one, depending on your point of view) for this movie. Give it a go

In the Golden days of porno-chic, the Svetlana-Frazier team produced big-budget, big-star movies of a high standard. "Sexboat", inspired by TV's "Love Boat", is a clumsily made programmer not up to their usual work.

Location filming and a very lengthy cast list spell big bucks, but the results are meager. As a structuralist I was taken aback by the paste-up job aspect of the movie, the first 16 minutes of which (including credits accounting for 20% of total running time) are just tacked-on to the film proper. This prologue has two sex scenes involving abusive cuckold husband Kevin James forcing his wife Loni Sanders to hump her boyfriend Mike Ranger, and then Kevin having a threesome with two cuties out in his Hefner mansion-styled lagoon.

He sends Loni on an all-female cruise ship (costing $5,000 a pop) to punish her, and it turns out she's never seen in the following scenes aboard the vessel. The awkwardly edited final reels are very sloppy, and Loni is reconciled with Kevin, their participation uncredited and not integrated into the rest of the movie. I don't see this glaring defect referred to in the previous reviews on IMDb, but it is obvious. I suppose they added these stars to a finished film for commercial reasons.

The hour-long main film is stillborn, establishing a premise lifted from Billy Wilder's classic "Some Like It Hot", acknowledged explicitly by the lead player exclaiming "Nobody's perfect" early on, quoting that film's memorable final line. Randy West and pal Robert Lyon stowaway aboard the cruise ship in unconvincing drag, in order to get their hands on all the lovely ladies.

Scenario is very poorly developed: the boys have repeated slapstick sex scenes, frequently reveal their identities to the girls, and nothing much happens. Out of desperation, an idiotic subplot takes over as the ship is invaded by pirates in cahoots with the corrupt female captain as part of a never-realized kidnapping scheme. This gives our jerky heroes a chance to be heroic, and amounts to nothing more than childish cosplay action and the occasional 'Arghhh!" on the soundtrack.

Some famous actresses stand out momentarily in the ensemble, including Kelly Nichols imported from NYC as a lesbian and Little Oral Annie as breast in show plus deep throat purveyor. It adds up to an over-stuffed, scatter- shot nothing.

The story here is that a lot of women, for one reason or another, sign on to a cruise on a ship manned by women, so to speak. Two of the gals turn out to be guys in disguise. It's a lot dirtier but not as funny as "Some Like It Hot." The entire movie seems to begin where "Some Like It Hot" left off, with Jack Lemmon and Marilyn Monroe snuggled up together and she says, "Let's have a party," and he says, "Yes, Let's have a party. It might even turn out to be a SURPRISE party."

It's from what has come to be known as the golden age of porn. That is to say, there is a plot. It's not simply repetitive closeups of the Washington Monument meeting the Holland Tunnel, although we have the obligatory orgie scene.

The first skin flick I saw was at a theater in Times Square, years ago, with a friend, Phil, and his wife Ingrid. We sat there in silence for about ten minutes, at first excited, then bored. "Why do you think they keep pulling out?" asked Phil. "Maybe they're all Catholics," offered Ingrid. After half an our of subsidence into boredom I asked the guy sitting in the seat next to me for a match. "Sure," he said nervously, taking a book of perspiration-soaked matches from his breast pocket and handing them to me. It's a curious thing to watch human being copulate. After a while it's just as boring as if they were rhesus macaques. Maybe less so.

At any rate this one belongs to the golden age when plots were introduced, however minimal they might be, even compared to afternoon soaps. And it's interesting to see what genetalia looked like before glabrous became glamorous. The women are glossy and beautiful, the men indistinguishable.

Its stimulation quotient, for males, is maybe 50 percent. Not good, not bad. The plot is dismissable, as is the acting, the direction, the score -- everything except the sexual encounters, and as far as they go there have been worse. There have been better too.

"Sexboat," a 1980 adult film directed by David I. Frazer and Svetlana Mischoff, is a raunchy, comedic adventure that will leave you both entertained and aroused. With a simple yet effective premise, this film takes you on a wild ride filled with sexual escapades and hilarious twists.

The story follows two lucky stowaways, Laura's driver and Roscoe, who sneak aboard an all-girl cruise ship for six weeks of unadulterated fun. With 600 horny women and not a single man in sight, the stage is set for a journey of erotic exploration and comedic chaos.

One of the most memorable aspects of "Sexboat" is its blend of humor and eroticism. The film doesn't take itself too seriously, and the result is a light-hearted and fun atmosphere that enhances the sexual encounters. From the moment our heroes find themselves in this unique situation, the audience is treated to a variety of steamy scenarios, including an impressive one-man-on-five-women orgy that is sure to leave a lasting impression.

As the film progresses, the hijinks continue as slave-trading pirates hijack the ship. However, even this dangerous twist can't dampen the playful tone of the film, as the pirates find themselves overwhelmed by the feisty and desiring women. In one particularly memorable scene, Nicole Black, playing a lustful pirate, takes control of her captive, played by Svetlana Mischoff. Black's character dominates the encounter, teasing and pleasing with equal measure, her wild red hair contrasting with Mischoff's helpless expressions of pleasure. The scene is a perfect example of the film's ability to blend domination and humor, as the usually stoic pirate surrenders to passion.

While the film certainly delivers on its promise of explicit content, the storytelling and production values are somewhat lacking. The acting is passable, but the real stars of the show are the creative sexual scenarios and the energetic performances of the actresses. The comedy, though effective, relies heavily on physical humor and slapstick, which may not appeal to all audiences.

In conclusion, "Sexboat" is a fun and frisky ride that delivers on its promise of adult entertainment. With a healthy dose of humor and a cast of captivating performers, it offers a unique and entertaining experience. While it may not be a masterpiece of cinematography, it is a solid entry in the world of adult films.

When Mark finds out his best friend Sam is getting too friendly with his wife. Sharon. He sends her on an all girl cruise (not before he forces Sharon and Sam to sleep together one more time of course). He think this will teach her a lesson. But unbeknowst to him two male stowaways dressed as women will be on this trip as well. The typical porn shenanigans prevail. While this movie doesn't rival David Frazer's later made classic "Pink Lagoon", it's still a lot of fun and hearkens back to the good ol' days when porn wasn't homogenized to the point of being boringly redundant. One of the best compliments one can give an adult film is that it's able to keep your attention throughout the length of the movie (as opposed to 5 minute 'sessions' so to speak) and this one succeeds in that.

My Grade: B