O Carro Sinistro

I admit The Hearse is not the last word in brilliance, but there seems to be something about it that kept me hooked. A simple plot centres around 30-something Jane recovering from a bitter divorce and the death of her father by deciding to stay at her aunt's house, which unbeknown to her, is haunted. Strange phenomena starts as soon as she settles in: lights going on and off, windows suddenly opening and closing, and (the main point) a suspicious looking Hearse appearing at her door.....

You obviously wonder what is going to happen next: is the Hearse simply a matter of imagination on Jane's part or is it something a lot more serious? The Hearse as a whole contains very little in the way of gory, blood dripping scenes; it is in fact a movie where the viewer has to go into the mind of the central characters and try and discover their motives as to why certain events happen. Why are the local people against Jane; what is the suspicious nature surrounding a nice young man called Tom that she unexpectedly meets? Many questions arise that are quite (albeit QUITE) addressed come the end of the film.

Lead star Trish Van Devere sets a good example of a strong-minded woman who is understandably spooked and scared by the unusual goings on. You actually feel for Jane! Her co-stars, however, can't be so easily forgiven - atrocious acting in some parts.

What makes this film work in some respect is the sense of coldness and eeriness surrounding the Hearse (despite the driver's constant smiling), and the strange goings on in this house; it is very reminiscent (as another reviewer mentioned) of the 2001 movie The Others. Admittedly, the final 15 minutes or so of The Hearse is a let down; I obviously don't want to give it away, but I'm sure for viewers who have witnessed the film, it could have been done with a lot more style and a lot more vigour. Then again, The Hearse was never meant to be this big budget horror movie in the first place - a typical B-movie flick that does recommend a slightly better IMDb rating than the current 3.3 I feel. 5/10

The Hearse is a deeply confusing 1980 horror which wasn't even remotely what I expected it to be.

It tells the story of a woman who inherits her aunts house but upon moving in comes to realise the locals don't like her and that the house itself might have its secrets.

The "Hearse" in question doesn't play as much of a role as I'd expected, which is odd considering that's supposedly what the movie is about.

The whole thing looks and sounds the part and the lead does a passable job but the moment things happen she becomes deeply annoying and I found myself scratching my head and not entirely knowing what I was watching.

Even now I'm not 100% on what went down and will chalk it up to being another one of those vague titles that doesn't feel like it needs to fully explain itself. I'm all for things being open to interpretation but this is taking that a tad far.

Confusing, underwhelming and not one I would dream of recommending.

The Good:

I like the hearse concept

The Bad:

Hearse is badly underutilized

Story makes very little sense

The lead actress falls apart when she falls apart

Things I Learnt From This Movie:

You'd think a movie about a hearse would be....you know....about a hearse

Before watching it, I decided to give the trailer a look and liked what I saw. But when it came to actually watching the feature. Well that was another story. Even with such a novel idea, it couldn't escape its roots that hang heavily in this old-hat haunted house format. No surprises or shocks here. The pallid story never grips or inserts much interest, as it becomes a wearisome tale of never-ending, suspicious tedium. The slow grinding pace doesn't help matters either. It seems to be all build up, but director George Bowers' predictable touch can't seem to raise much in the way of suspense and really overuses the usual scare tactics with miserable results. This even goes for Webster Lewis' generically telegraphed score. One or two effective surreal set-pieces (involving the hearse and its driver) and Mori Kawa's nicely atmospheric photography, just can't make-up for the lame, weak and overly boring presentation. Performances feel wooden and terribly uninterested, and it seems to show. Trish Van Devere fluffs about, and Joseph Cotton adds his two bobs worth. Put it under the very forgettable files.

This very standard early 80's haunted house/possessed souls chiller does feature one ingenious and genuinely creepy gimmick, namely the titular vehicle that mysteriously drives around at night. Barely recovered from personal problems in the big city, Jane Hardy moves to an inherited mansion in a small and very superstitious village. The locals treat her like dirt, especially when they learn Jane is the niece of the previous resident, who worshiped the devil and whose dead body mysteriously vanished when the hearse ran into a bridge and caught fire. It doesn't take long before Jane herself begins to suffer from nightmares and the antique hearse even begins to stalk her! "The Hearse" is very slow but occasionally atmospheric and well-acted. Unfortunately however, the script is full of holes, too predictable and the total lack of spectacle is pretty hard to forgive. I respect the fact there were obviously financial limitations to this production, but to deliver an entirely bloodless film is a tad bit exaggerated. Class actor and horror veteran Joseph Cotton ("Baron Blood", "The Abominable Dr. Phibes", "Island of the Fishmen") is totally wasted in the role of obnoxious attorney. Crap ending, too.

"The Hearse" is a low-budget, bottom-of-the-barrel little shocker. It's uninvolving throughout, and never terrifying. The hopelessly cliched story, with all the familiar "haunted house" tricks, would be enough to sink this movie, but the job is completed by the poor direction and the murky look of the film, which often makes it hard for us to understand what's happening onscreen. The ending leaves almost everything unexplained and is just as arbitrary and nonsensical as the rest of this film. The good performances can't save it by any means.