I guerrieri dell'anno 2072

Totally unconvincing as an actual view at the future, New Gladiators (aka: "Rome 2072: The New Gladiators" or "Fighting Centurions") is none the less an extremely entertaining Sci-Fi action programmer from Lucio Fulci. At times gory, action packed (full of exploding-for-no-reason vehicles), cheese-tastic dialogue ("Go to Hell!", "I would - if I thought it would increase my ratings!") and delicious scenery reused from other Italian sci-fi films, giving the film the feel of an episode of Doctor Who circa 1983 as directed by slow-minded aliens.

Jared Martin, of the 1980s War of the Worlds series and Fulci's own AENIGMA, is our hero - the star Killbike champion. It's hard to tell if he is the star of the TV show Killbike BEFORE he's framed for murdering the Clockwork Orange-esque gang who murdered his wife, or if that is a flashback (as indicated by the commentary from Fulci-fan Troma staff) and that's how he became a Killbike star. I think it's the former, though. He finds himself in a prison cell (a one room riff on Stuart Gordon's FORTRESS which had yet to be made) with Fred "The Hammer" Williamson (From Dusk Till Dawn, Black Caesar, New Barbarians etc), Hal Yamagouchi (from "Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou") and Al Cliver (dubbed again by the guy who did Zombie for him), among others. They are trained in hilarious strobe-lit scene with mentally-projected holograms to become more effective killers (this has very little to do with the game show they ultimately compete in), there's a love story, in-fighting, a sadistic guard...You get the picture.

No, words cannot describe the joys of the picture - small model sets, actually entertaining sci-fi ideas (almost universally executed beneath their value) and Riz Ortolani (orchestral composer and film composer for "Cannibal Holocaust" and Fulci's "Don't Torture a Duckling" and "Perversion Story/One On Top of the Other") contributes a scruzzy New Wave rock score which is a total, rip-roaring triumphant cheesefest. Sure, there's only three pieces of music and they loop constantly, but by the end you'll be so happy it won't matter!

The DVD is a fairly typical early 21st century Troma disc - fullscreen video master, stereo, minimal extras. A commentary from the "FBI" (Fulci Benevolant Institution) is just Trent "Killjoy, Dead Girl and Terror Firmer" Haaga and Troma's then-DVD producer Ronni Raygun riffing on the movie. It's unclear whether only some of the affection for the film is sarcastic, or all of it, but it's entertaining enough. There's a short interview with the beautiful Antonella Fulci (not as good as on the "Zombie" blu-ray or Arrow "Gates of Hell" Daughter of Darkness interviews) apparently filmed by herself or a friend (note the Divine "Love Reaction" vinyl prominantly displayed...did she think John Waters owned Troma?), a Dario Argento interview (not a lot involved here, but mention is made of Fulci and how he didn't play a part influencing Dario, at all), a short Robert Englund interview about...Dario Argento, and the usual introduction and trailer. There's also some Troma extras with nothing to do with the film.

Considering it's a full screen video master, and the film is clearly missing some information (yes I would prefer a 1.85:1 transfer but fortunately New Gladiators was not a cinemascope production, so we're not missing too much), the transfer is pretty good. Once you get used to the idea that in this dystopian future, a particular shade of dark green has replaced the colour black, you'll notice it upscales just fine.

Overall, it's the best version of the movie out there I'm aware of (apparently the US Media release cuts out some of the violence) and it's pretty cheap, so pick it up.

Set in the 21st century, criminals are forced to fight each other like gladiators on motorcycles for the enjoyment of TV audiences. Sound familiar? Arnold Schwarzenegger "The Running Man" wouldn't come out for three years later, but Stephen King's novella came out two years earlier, so don't give director Lucio Fulci too much credit. Part of a cycle of cheap Italian ripoff films capitalizing on the popularity of "The Road Warrior" and "Escape from New York," this one is better than most of it's contemporaries, although that's an admittedly a low bar. In the film's favor is the cast includes Fred Williamson, which is always a treat, a charmingly 80s synthesizer heavy score by Riz Ortolani, and solid direction for Fulci. As far as director Fulci goes, I've never quite decided if he's an artist along the lines of Dario Argento or Mario Bava or is merely a talented gorehound like Joe D'Amato or Bruno Mattei. I think I lean towards the latter, though Fulci's "The Beyond" is pretty great, but it's still no "Deep Red" or "Suspiria." Back to "The New Gladiators," the story is corny, most of the performance are goofy, the action is ham-fisted, but the film has an undeniable 80s grindhouse charm that I found irresistible. From Ortolani's rockin synthesizer score, to Fred Williamson kicking ass, to strobe light fight sequences, to some terrifically gory practical special effects, to awful laser special effects, to some wonderfully corny miniature future cityscape sets, there was a definite so-bad-it's good quality to this film that I loved, but Fulci's direction of the motorcycle sidecar action sequences are pretty lacking in comparison to George Miller or even a hacky Italian contemporary like Enzo G. Castellari. Overall, this is not a good film in the traditional sense, but if you're a fan of cheesy 80s low budget post-apocalyptic Mad Max knock-off films, it's essential viewing.

New Gladiators (1983)

1/2 (out of 4)

Italian apocalyptic film is set during 2073 when TV audiences have been turned onto violence after years of war. Normal television isn't accepted anymore so two rival networks have to come up with shows that feature real people facing real death. The latest game show is to have gladiator battle, which with Fulci directing, leads to countless death scenes. This is an incredibly cheap sci-fi film that might be called an early version of what would become The Running Man but this thing here is so cheap that it should get on your last nerve after the ten-minute mark. The only thing going for this film happens in the first five minutes where there's a rather nice throat slashing but after this the film offers nothing except a couple laughs from the cheap production. Even though there are a lot of deaths in the film, if you're expecting classic Fulci gore then you're going to be highly disappointed as there is very little outside the previous mentioned throat slash. Fred Williamson of Black Caesar fame gets the main role but does very little with it. There were a lot of these films made in Italy around this time but this is the first I've seen and I really hope it's the worst of the bunch because if there is one out there worse than this then I'm somewhat scared to see it.

Well with Lucio Fulci in the directors chair you can count on two things straight away; Excellent visuals including an inordinate amount of Fulci's trademark extreme facial close ups (especially the eyes) and a confused story that will leave you scratching your head. You can also count on a third staple present in most of Fulci's work and the factor for which he is probably best remembered; His predilection for incorporating extreme gore scenes into his films (even his non horror efforts such as the film in question) In relation to all of the above, sure enough and true to form, Fulci yet again delivers the goods.

The story set in the future, depicts a world where deadly gladiatorial contests take place for the TV viewing audiences' pleasure. The said contests take place on motorcycles whereby the combatants are required to batter their opponents off of their bikes with the last man standing being declared the winner.

Jared Martin (Yes Dusty Farlow from Dallas!) plays Drake, the Kill Bike champion who along with the likes of B-movie regulars Fred Williamson, Al Yamanouchi and Al Cliver must fight for their lives in this cruel sport.

Sadly it has to be said however, that there are far too few scenes of the sport in question with the vast majority of the films running time being squandered on a boring conspiracy storyline (and lots and lots of shots of peoples eyes!). Luckily things do pick up commendably in the final 30 or so minutes though and we get to see some admittedly excellent battle scenes involving motorbikes and sidecars in a futuristic take on the famous chariot sequence from Ben Hur.

Overall, whilst not one of Fulci's best works, this is certainly far from his worst and provides a fairly entertaining watch. It's just such a pity that the sheer energy of the final third couldn't have been more abundant throughout.

There's some decent ideas in Lucio Fulci's contribution to the Italian post-nuke sci-fi action sweepstakes of the early '80s, but they're rendered somewhat inert thanks to the wooden acting of the Americans, and the horrid dubbing of the Italians. The Lego-Land-with-Xmas-Lights miniatures don't help, either.

And is it me, or did Fred Williamson just disappear from the final scene? He just vanishes. Where did he go? Was he called for reshoots for "1990: The Bronx Warriors?" Was there a summons to loop his dialogue for "Warriors of the Wasteland?" Did he need to attend a Kansas City Chiefs benefit dinner? Who knows?