A Satânica Madame Sin

Bette Davis as an insane super-agent and Robert Wagner as her dupe? Why not? Everybody's having a lot of fun. The villains are equally amusing. The whole thing is tongue-in-cheek and high camp, and it always remains true to its own little world. One of the-lets-have-fun-and-not-take-anything-too-seriously-made-for-TV-flicks that ABC excelled in churning out in the early 70's.

My DVD describes Madame Sin as 'a prime example of the camp spy genre'; how misleading! Yes, there are some crazy futuristic inventions used by the baddies to achieve their nefarious goal, but the film as a whole is actually rather sober affair, especially considering the impact of the unexpectedly bleak ending.

Bette Davis plays the titular character, a criminal mastermind who lives on a remote Scottish island from where she conducts her wicked money-making schemes. Robert Wagner is ex-CIA agent Anthony Lawrence, who is abducted by Sin's henchmen and used as a pawn to assist in the stealing of a Polaris submarine, which the villainess intends to sell to revolutionaries.

Rather than a garish, cheezy romp full of outrageous set pieces and witty one-liners from the hero, writer/director David Greene plays much of the film surprisingly straight, even going so far as to add an avant-garde vibe to early scenes, taking the film firmly out of the realm of Matt Helm or James Bond. A bizarre electronic score only adds to the off-beat atmosphere.

Depicted as such, the film sometimes feels frustratingly dreary and uneventful: one longs for an exotic location, a desperate shootout or an exciting car chase to alleviate the tedium that occasionally sets in as Lawrence tries to thwart Sin's plans.

Ever wonder what Fu Manchu would look like if Christopher Lee looked just like Bette Davis?

Stop wondering, here's the answer. Ms. Davis plays the evil Madam Sin, an oriental villainess who is plotting world conquest from her Scottish castle, fully equipped with laboratory, sonic weapons, hypnotic drugs, etc.

She abducts Robert Wagner, an ex-CIA man whom she frames as a defector. Then she dupes him into helping her kidnap a naval officer and steal a nuclear submarine. European audiences paid to see this pilot for an unsold TV series.

Now who didn't enjoy Bette Davis doing her very own impression of Fu Manchu"? She's so hammy it's good! Sadly, though, it also features Robert Wagner who was never the most compelling of actors to watch. He's an agent for the American government whom she uses her mind-bending ray upon so that he will help her and her scheming henchman "De Vere" (Denholm Elliott) to pinch a billion-dollar Polaris nuclear submarine from it's Scottish loch base. To that end, she uses her guile and expert manipulation techniques to get him to kidnap his pal "Cavendish" (Gordon Jackson) who co-ordinates all the naval activity and whom she hopes to brainwash into diverting this vessel into the clutches of her evil client. The question is, though, might "Lawrence" (Wagner) have enough cerebral mettle to resist her powerful gadgetry and thwart her cunning plan? What I did enjoy about this is the sheer joy of a star who is out to send the whole thing up. She's having fun - and Elliott actually does quite well too as her dastardly cohort. There's some lovely Argyllshire scenery and plenty of toys straight out of the "Doctor Who" end-of-season sale from 1972. Though there are a few interlopers from time to time, it's really just left to the three of them to tell us this daft story and for my money they do it fine. No, you'll never see it up for an award but I did rather savour the conclusion, her aspirations for Windsor Castle and that malevolent grin on her face could strip paint! Aim low and you ought not to be disappointed.

The movie does have some nice ideas - using sonic weaponry etc. that does make it more interesting. It doesn't seem to have anything else that drew me in. Wagner and Davis acted well, and there were a few funny scenes that would draw light chuckles. The plot does have a few twists that does make it watchable but nothing that will make you think or go beyond the story itself. The implausibility of some fight scenes appear a bit confusing, but need to be taken according to the time of the movie being made. If you have an hour-half to spare, this movie won't really help ease the boredom, so best bet would be to skip it. Rating 4/10.