I Am Hooligan

Well, this was pretty awful, a cheaper-than-ever hooligan drama obviously put on the video shelves to rip-off the success of the GREEN STREET films among others. It's a tough watch and the only good thing I can say about it is that it takes place in a wide variety of different real-world locations which at least gives it more realism than some of these no-budgeters. The story is about an annoying kid who is manipulated into becoming a violent hooligan by some of his dodgy friends, and the violence that ensues. THE BILL star Mark Wingett plays the lad's dad in many drawn-out domestic violence scenes that do nothing aside from pad out the running time.

If you get past the first 15 mins you have clearly no respect for yourself and enjoy being tortured by shoddy filmmaking and acting so bad a pre school nativity play would put it to shame.

Wanna see a movie made for a few hundred quid and them getting their mates to act in it for free? Then watch this

Whoever edited this was on gear because it was all over the place and he couldn't keep it still on one shot for more than a few seconds. Even during the slow talking scenes it's all over the place. Chopping to another useless angle speaking of useless angles, Guess it could have been the camera mans Fault as well because i'm pretty sure they employed a kid with A,D,D to film the thing. There were some very dodgy dutch angles and points where the camera was zoomed right in on peoples faces for no reason, i'm guessing his past experience before making crappy football hooligan films was making the erotic kind of movies my dad used to hide in his sock drawer. There's no reason for close ups that are that close to the actors face.

The colour correction was all over the place, one shot it was dark the next really bright even in the same room they couldn't keep consistency

Same with the sound editing. In some points i could hear the background better than the cast. Then again with the awful acting this might have been done on purpose.. It all felt very unnatural and uncomfortable to watch.

The plot is just another box standard hooligan movie but its done so bad..is so bad it's not even "so bad it's good bad" kinda thing it's just bad .

The acting is beyond terrible, the production is a complete mess and it feels cheap dirty and not very well made.

Also Who ever directed this tried to pay homage to (or copy parts of ) clockwork orange. There were a few scenes that stood out where you could see this. One when they are walking by the river and another when they are having a fight in a barn and classical music is playing amongst a few others in the film. I'm sure if stanley kubrick would have still been alive he would have been very impressed with the directors shoddy cheap nasty shots that showed no talent whatsoever behind them and completely b@stardized his work.

Poor sod was probably rolling in his grave when this was being made. If you are gonna copy or pay homage to someone do it right and put some effort into it. Sticking on some random classical music on while they fight another gang or playing the music from the clockwork orange film while they walk down the river footpath is just being lazy and cringy seeing though the rest of your film looks like it was made on special offer for £19.99

Should you watch this online ... no. Save your bandwidth and watch something good.

If your friend gives you the dvd you'll get more fun out of it using it as a frisbee and he's probably not a friend at all for lending it to you.

Best off just binning it.

One of the worst films I've ever seen. To compare it with Clockwork Orange is beyond ridiculous

Absolute rubbish

Before I get to critical, let me just say the story isn't BAD! It could be a decent story if it was executed in any way better. Anyways,

The audio was amazing. Sometimes you couldn't hear the dialogue at ALLLLL because the actors just whisper. Sometimes you can't hear cause the music is at the same level as the dialogue. And sometimes you can't hear because they forgot to add music. "How do you know they meant to add music?" Well, my friends and I had to watch with subtitles because it's British. Deep British. That plus the bad audio means you can't understand a thing.

The acting was stale. What more do you want me to say?

The cinematography was excellent. We'd go through like 5 different shots for each scene. Half of them would be so saturated and edited, that it genuinely looked like it was out of the matrix. The other half you ask? Not edited at all. In one scene we'd go from the matrix, to something absolutely overexposed.

I have seen some bad stuff lately, but oh my days this is an absolute atrocity.

I like how people compare it to A Clockwork Orange, I think the comparison was that at some point Stanley Kubrick went for a crap, thus may be what that crap evolved into.

I appreciate low budget films have a struggle, they have to strive to be something, this is just abysmal.

Ruling out pool cue, golf buddy cam, and headboard cam which are without a doubt creative, if not shocking additions to this otherwise pathetic effort at filmmaking, this film offers nothing, nothing of any value to anyone in any way shape or form.

I knew it was going to be bad as soon as it started, the stock effect I AM HOLLIGAN title credit on some sort of slapdash background (like kids wallpaper), then the slow walk through the council estate of its lead, the same walk you will see half a dozen times.

Then the train, oh yes the train seen through the railway fence, you must see this same train going back and forth 100 times, exactly the same footage.

I feel bad reviewing this so harshly, as my good friend has a role in it, and I told then how bad the film was.

The film has not one endearing feature, no message, brings nothing new to the table, it's just a complete dogs abortion all round.