Almost Adults

I follow the makers of this film (Sarah and Adrianna) as well as the actresses who also play Carmilla, so please know that I am trying to like this movie.

My initial thoughts on the plot of this film was that it seemed just like that Leighton Meester movie, "Life Partners" but I was desperately hoping it was not. It wasn't the best movie in the world, but it still beat this one.

I'm sorry, but I can't like this movie. It's just not possible. It's cliché, the acting is bad, the script is shallow and boring. The fact that its filled with Lesbian stereotypes to the rim just adds insult to injury.

Story line: Boring and cliché. It's filled with lesbian stereotypes and rather than a nervous exploration into the lesbian world as a "baby dyke" it ended up being incredibly shallow, typical and simply unrealistic. The film tries too hard to be funny. And while something said in the film may work among friends, film viewers aren't friends with the characters because there is no depth.

Characters: No depth to any of them whatsoever. By the end of the film you don't know them any better than at the beginning of the film.

Acting: It's OK at times, but for the most part it is not great. I expected more from Elise and Natasha outside of Carmilla. But considering how both overacted even the simplest of human interactions goes to show that both are simply too inexperienced. This was an hour and a half that I just ended up cringing and stopping the film. When it came to serious scenes, I just could not take either of them seriously.

Summary: I hate to say I hated this film. But I hated this film. It was boring, cliché, had no depth and was just not funny. I'm sorry Sarah and Adrianna, but this was a bad film. I walked away not gaining anything from this film except for cringe.

This movie was terrible, I had to turn it off and I NEVER do that. The acting was cringe worthy and the jokes were terrible. Where she's like I put my finger down there and just left.. I thought maybe the response would be I was nervous or something. She instead is all, I didn't know what to do...? Like common you've never touched yourself? The guy you dated never touched you?!

I'm not familiar with the two actresses. I wasn't expecting much. The film itself is a relatively low budget situational drama. It could probably make a decent play.

What I enjoyed was the kookiness of the two leads. They were overacting but then half the story is about overreacting, being a bit annoying and self centred. But as friends, they don't realise it until the friendship is tested. But I liked all the little ways they were reacting to each other, there was real chemistry there. The levity helped break the moments of tension.

I felt there were some overdone moments. The last scene should have been cut. But I guess it shows how both got closure and moved on. The pacing in the story drifts a bit so it's slightly too long. The story isn't convoluted but also not very deep and plays up to some huge cliches, for instance not all women who play softball/soccer/football/sports are lesbians. The way they talk in the film is also annoying at first, but aside from the parents.. That's true of all the actors except the soccer chick.

It was really adorable and I LOVED the great wordplay with innuendos that are sprinkled all around in the movie. The relationships are actually rather fascinating. But... I am sorry to say that some of the jokes almost ruined the movie for me. Most had me seriously cracking up...But then...1. "50yo woman with two mentally disabled sons". It was actually cruel. Also, really... insensitive. It is just not wise or kind to mock others, especially if you never took the time to even consider what it would be like to be them, or how they actually got there. Also, 2. "Bald 40yo man that runs a convenience store". This Really repulsed me because if you care anything about immigrants, refugees, just people in general, this humor is shows ignorance. Is this Trump humor? Just random blows at innocent people based off of faulty assumptions! Be careful about your humor. It can really ruin an otherwise great movie! Now, another joke was chosen by the writers to carry on throughout the movie, and it was incredibly harsh. It was when the girls continued to bash a man and reduce him as a person to nothing more than the embarrassing size of his penis. Haven't enough women dealt with this to understand how bad this makes people feel? Women are judged all the time about their bodies. Now, before you assume about me, I just want to also add that, No, I am not a man that was burned by the joking. I am just a compassionate and empathetic woman that instantly feels the sharp pain that other people might be feeling when they are attacked out of nowhere by this kind of humor. It takes more effort to be kind, but it really does matter. No one, male or female should be judged and mocked for who they are or for their shapes. Keep those hateful thoughts to yourself, please, if you must have them.

This could have been a reasonably entertaining movie, if the scenes had been rehearsed more and if the director had gotten the right tone. But we are left with, for instance, cringy scenes where the actors don't know what to do with their hands while speaking, and the director keeps their awkwardness in frame. Halting lines delivered with entirely wrong emphasis. Some of the premises were not believable -- if the young lesbian had spent so much time watching lesbian porn, as shown, she surely would have had a better grasp of some basic moves. And the idea that her best friend did not know was too farfetched. The film had heart, but it needed a director who could perceive how weak the shots were, and it needed a scriptwriter who could fix the obvious flaws. This movie is better than a "class project" level of competence, but only just. There is not a single moment of brilliance or hilarity. Yet, it's sort of worth watching, if you're determined to watch EVERY lesbian movie you can find.