Like You Mean It

Interesting to see a film that depicts a central character that has a mental disorder for which he's received treatment. Mental disorders are very common, but most people don't recognize it when they see it. Often, it's associated with substance abuse problems. In the end, it's hard to tell which came first....the mental problem or the drug or alcohol abuse. In this story, Mark, the leading character, doesn't seem to have a drug problem, but he certainly is struggling with mental issues, none of which become well illuminated. It's unfortunate because nothing is learned about how to deal with loved ones who have mental problems. Even Jonah, Mark's boyfriend, doesn't seem to have a clue. Nor does their relationship therapist. The film remains a germ of a good idea, but it never got what it needed to fully germinate.

This is a good film. On the surface it is about a gay couple struggling to stay together, but it is actually about one-half of this couple.

Mark, played by LIKE YOU MEAN IT'S writer/director, Philipp Karner, doesn't merely have difficulty committing, he has increasing difficulty communicating with anyone. His character is interesting, especially in that, as a professional actor, auditioning generally for voice-over assignments, he must use a wide variety of voices. That English is not his native language, and though he has mastered an infinite variety of American accents, he is finding himself unable to continue.

Jonah, his boyfriend, played by Denver Milord, is a struggling musician. What is very subtle about this movie is that it shows us typical tensions a gay couple experiences but demonstrates a unique element: Post-traumatic stress disorder. Jonah, an intelligent man, is helpless to reach Mark, whose relationship to his estranged father is the backdrop to this couple's crisis.

It is well-acted and photographed, and unlike a lot of movies which have entertainers as main characters, it shows what they do. We see that Mark isn't just an actor down on his luck. We see him auditioning and we realize he's good. When Jonah sings to Mark one night, at Mark's request, we are shown that he is good and that he is doing the sort of music heard today. This adds to the realism.

LIKE IT IS is as thoughtful as any story by John Updike or Joyce Carol Oates. The short story may be the form which has most influenced this film. In my view, that is a plus.

This is one of those movies that isn't going to spoon feed you the plot. You just have to experience what's happening, what's going on.

And at first there doesn't seem to be much going on. After a while we know we're seeing the dynamics of a couple who are at the beginning of a breakup.

But that's what's on the surface. Beneath the surface, this is really a portrait of an actor. A family event triggers self-examination that makes him aware that he's been acting his way through life. He does it so well he's not always aware of what he's doing. Clearly, though, he's disassociated himself from significant and important parts of his life, including the relationship that is beginning to unravel.

I liked this movie. It's for adults. That the couple in question is gay is a bonus because most of what's made for our market is pretty cartoon-like. Pseudo rom-coms or overwrought tragedies. This is more like real life, even though the two main characters lead a somewhat more exotic life than most of us do. But it's a nice change of pace. It's not in the same league as Weekend or Futuro Beach, but it's not that far behind.

Give it a chance.

I've been giving this film a bit of thought since I saw it last week. Like You Mean It is a subtle, interesting film and I definitely recommend that you see it. Philipp Karner, writes, directs and plays the lead role in a slice-of-life about a gay couple whose relationship is put under the microscope as frustrated actor Mark starts to withdraw from intimacy, leaving his long-suffering boyfriend confused and hurt. The script is naturalistic with some sparkling, well-observed dialogue and strong performances from the actors, particularly in the cameo parts. The film is lovingly crafted and the use of audio to create ambiance and a sense of space is outstanding. The narrative pace is nicely judged and is punctuated by scenes of Mark driving around his home town, alternately attempting to save and sabotage his relationship, all the while ignoring calls from his sister back in Austria. The niggling flaw with the film is what gets left unsaid. There are hints of past medical issues, there are hints that Mark's relationship with his family is problematic but none of this is called out explicitly. When the resolution comes we're left unsatisfied and wondering why. Like Mark, the director is holding out on his audience, and while on the whole the unfolding tale is subtly and elegantly told it just falls short of creating sufficient motive to explain his character's actions. That said the film is an absorbing 90 minute window onto the world of a struggling couple, raises some interesting questions about how we undermine ourselves and is elegantly sketched. I'll definitely be looking out for more from Philipp Karner.

Saw this film in LA and was surprised by it's simplicity and power. This is not a "gay movie". Yes, the focus of the story is on a gay man but we start to realize it's about his difficulty loving himself and hence others. We understand why and how life is increasingly challenging for him as he attempts (as a European in America) to manage his past and get healthier. Mainstream audiences may be reluctant to pay to see a film about a gay man but star/writer/director Philipp Karner handles the sex scenes and sexuality in a restrained manner which affords all of us an understanding of the gay culture without offending. As a straight man, I really enjoyed the movie. I highly recommend LIKE YOU MEAN IT...for its wonderful, economical writing, direction and performances as well as its ability to enlighten and entertain!