Hansel & Gretel - Cacciatori di streghe

This is not a quality film and I don't think they even meant it to be good or memorable. If you watched the trailers and *didn't* expect it to be terrible, I'd be very, very surprised. I would never have paid to see this. I only saw it because I got passes to a free advance screening. And it was just as ridiculous as I expected - and I was pretty entertained. We were laughing pretty hard the whole time.

The movie wasn't trying to have a good plot or a surprise twist. Clocking in at a little over an hour, it could have been season finale of a B-grade TV series of the same premise. I think movie was just trying to be funny, and I think their jokes worked. Like how Hansel has a "medical condition" (not spoiling it here). It doesn't work in a physiological sense - but who cares? It was really funny that they even made that connection!

There was an incredible amount of gore in this movie; but I suppose that itself was a joke, given the premise of the movie. Their other jokes relied on anachronisms (weapons, fanboys, crime investigations). But they were careful enough that the anachronisms were funny in the context of the world-building instead of being glaring anomalies.

There might be some people complaining about what an inadequate film this was with respect to plot, but that would be missing the point. Don't watch this expecting to take away anything - it's really only just for the lawls.

When you start watching a movie titled "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters", you probably shouldn't expect all that much in the way of anything too complicated or heavy.

What you get from the ninety-odd minutes is Jeremy Renner (Hansel) and Gemma Arterton (Gretel) as the brother and sister from the candy house that you probably remember from the old fairy tales, only in this particular treatment, their childhood experience convinces them to start hunting witches with all manner of weaponry.

There are so many cool action scenes, the occasional bit of dark humour and plenty of bloody, violent horror/action as the siblings try to uncover the mystery behind children being abducted from a village, to a soundtrack that at times features rock. Some of the dialogue is decidedly modern, adding to a real melting pot of styles and themes.

An entertaining film that definitely doesn't take itself too seriously. Renner and Arterton are great, as is Famke Janssen as Muriel, the head honcho of the bad witch brigade. They're all hamming it up a bit, but it definitely works.

Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013)

** (out of 4)

R-rated, gory horror-adventure has brother and sisters Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretal (Gemma Arterton) called to a small town to try and locate some children that have been kidnapped by some witches. Soon they realize that a Queen witch (Famke Janssen) has bigger plans that could have a major change on the world. HANSEL & GRETEL: WITCH HUNTERS isn't quite as bad as some are making it out to be but there's no question that the entire film just has an uneasy mix of genres that never fully come together and in the end the film just came off as something that didn't know what it wanted to be or do. At times there's some campy comedy moments but these aren't good enough to save the picture. At other times we're given a fairly interesting look at two people hunting witches but the film doesn't do too much with this. We're also given a picture with some extremely graphic gore that comes out of nowhere. I really liked the fact that they went for a R-rating and didn't hold back for a smaller rating but at the same time if you took this away there really wouldn't be much to the movie. The film manages to be slightly entertaining because of this type of gore but at the same time I can see how it might not sit well with some more sensitive viewers. Another thing I liked was the actual look of the witches. The CGI effects were actually quite believable whenever the witches changed form in their faces. The look of the major witch was also quite nice and benefited from the strong and fun performance by Janssen who managed to bring a certain sexy nature to the role. Both Renner and Arterton are good in their parts but the screenplay really makes both characters quite boring and uninteresting. The supporting players here are usually much better and the movie probably would have benefited having them in it more. This includes an obsessed fan of the duo as well as an evil sheriff. Another problem with the film is that you just never really get involved with anything going on. It looks nice and some of the action scenes are put together nicely but there's just no real energy that brings you into the film.

Lately we have seen a lot of these fairy tale remakes, where they take a basic fairy tale plot, add in a lot of CGI, slightly darker atmosphere and some sex and call it a day. I still prefer the Disney version, thank you very much. At least in those films the story flows smoothly and the characters are not cardboard cutouts. That being said, this particular fairy tale movie was a pleasant surprise. For one, it didn't try to retell the same exact story we have grown up with. Rather it took the story of Hansel and Gretel and asked the question: "What if they grew up?" I'm totally on board with that question. It's something we've never seen before and frankly it's a fascinating idea. So yeah, colour me interested.

The film itself ends up being pretty much what anyone would expect. I hesitate to call it a good film, because it has numerous plot holes, nonsensical twists and its characters are somewhat bland and clichéd. On the other hand, it has a good visual style, its action is very pleasing, if a bit gore-filled (not a bad thing in this case), the two main actors are actually pretty good in their roles, and as a whole it's just plain solid fun. Yeah, it's stupid most of the time, but it's fun kind of stupid. The kind where you're just able to sit back, enjoy the scenery and laugh at the jokes.

It also needs to be remembered that this was Tommy Wirkola's first big budget film. And for a debut film, this shows a lot of promise. The style is definitely there, as is the atmosphere. The story-telling and the character development need some work, but even big name directors struggle with those every now and then. I'm looking forward to what this guy will bring us next.

And that's this film. Yeah, it's one of those so bad it's good films, but I'd still recommend this. The idea alone is worth checking out.

Overall, the story isn't very great and is pretty predictable, but it's very entertaining. Basically, it's a cool movie that has a lot of cool kills, and weaponry with a no better than decent story. Plus, watching Gemma Arterton (and according to my female friends, Jeremy Renner) make the movie more enjoyable as well . It's quite violent and pretty gory, but if you're like me (a young adult who's pretty sensitive to blood and gore), you'll be fine. There are only a few parts that are cringe-worthy. Has a nice amount of rewatchability to it and is definitely a fun one to watch. If you're looking for a good story, you'll probably be disappointed, but if you're looking for something entertaining and fun to watch, it's a good one to watch.