Colpo basso

Cameron Mitchell's career is varied to say the least. One minute he's Minessota Clay, next he's a crazed gangster in Medusa, or a cop in The Nightmare Never Ends. If it was possible to speak to him today, I'd set myself down next to him at a bar, slide him a beer and say "Hey Cam, what was the easiest gig you ever did?" Unfortunately he can't answer, but I'm sure he would have said: "Probably that martial arts film where I didn't even need to get out of a seat, wore sunglasses, mumbled a lot, and groped a young actress." That film would be Low Blow, an action film starring Mitchell (who was an ex-special forces bar man in Codename Vengeance), Leo Fong, with an appearance by Stack Pierce (of Pyshic Killer 'fame'). Fong is an ex-cop turned PI, who seems to spend his time dealing with endemic street crime in San Francisco. While he's out kicking the heads in of two bag snatchers, he's spotted and hired by businessman John Templeton, in order to rescue his daughter from a cheesy new age cult (led by Mitchell (who played a crap cop in The Demon), but run with an iron fist by his daughter/wife!). Mitchell (who was a slick businessman in Memorial Valley Massacre), who wears sunglasses, a hooded robe, and a star on his cheek, seems oblivious to all the armed guards and beating and rambles on about the meek and says 'Blessed' a lot.

Fong pays a visit to the cult's plantation and immediately gets into bother with hired goons hanging around the place. He ends up rescuing a dude but reckons he's gonna need back up to get the businessman's daughter back, and you know what that means, right? Correct: A fairly pointless fighting competition, complete with Stack Pierce, ninjas, and a strong woman. Gang assembled, they all head off for a final showdown at the plantation (which involves needlessly killing hired goons whom, up until that point, had hardly hurt anyone.

You won't get much in the way of gore in this film (except for the bit where Fong stamps his foot right through a guy's face!) as Low Blow is played more for laughs than anything. This is just as well, as some of the acting is dodgy to say the least (especially Fong's secretary). Mitchell as usual just falls into the roll smoothly (he always seems to be enjoying himself, which is why I enjoy most films he's in), put I wouldn't put this high up on your list of films to see. It's good enough, but no classic, that Low Brow film.

The bootless trio from the annoyingly haired 'Killpoint' is back : director Frank Harris, and 'stars' Leo Fong and Cameron Mitchell. A triumvirate of terrible. Harris in particular, should be ashamed of himself.

'Low Blow' isn't as sick, racist or downright nasty as 'Killpoint' - and that's it. It's just as amateur, vacant, irritating and soul-destroying in every other regard. Fong, despite slightly improved hair, drudges through this all-out dog's breakfast like a stop-motion clog.

A ridiculous, dozy cult led by Mitchell in a hood and sunglasses; and - the film's only plus-point - dishy but demented disciple, Akosua Busia, have kidnapped some girl and are brainwashing her on a farm. It's up to somnambulant Fong and a few bumpy grunts to rescue her.

All Fong films' selling point is chiefly the fact he knew Bruce Lee, but so did a lot of other people. I met Sir Michael Hordern once, but I don't go around doing Lear at the Old Vic.

You may ask - justifiably - why even watch this turnip ?

Good question.

like others here, i bought this movie for $3. And yes, the acting is awful, it is low budget, the case has nothing to do with the movie, and the soundtrack appears to consist of one song. However, it is one of the funniest movies i have ever seen. Does the fact that it is not intentionally funny cancel that out? Does hilariously bad choreography equate to a bad movie? or story lines that don't make sense - such as yanakunda calling Karma "my daughter, my wife". This movie gets funnier every time i watch it. The script at times is ridiculous - and that makes it very quotable. its also a great movie to watch when you are drunk. So, in terms of film making, this movie is right down there with the worst, so i could easily give this a poor score like others before me have. But i watch movies to be entertained. and if this movie is so bad that its entertaining for every minute that it lasts, then it is a good movie. If it gets better every time i see it, then it is a great movie. and this movie has proved to be far more entertaining than most of the "best" movies ever made, so i give it a 10.

some scenes to watch for: all driving scenes, the pointless church scene (he drove to a church and crashed his car just to say 2 words to a guy), the car and chainsaw scene, the puppy scene (totally random and unexplained), i could go on forever

Private dick Leo Fong is hired by millionaire Troy Donahue to rescue his runaway heiress daughter from Cameron Mitchell's pan-theistic "Universal Enlightenment" cult. Mitchell calls himself "Yarakunda", has a pentagram on his cheek, a red dot on his forehead, a cross around his neck, wears big Jim Jones sunglasses, dresses like a druid and hardly ever stands up during the entire film, so you know he means business, or possibly wasn't paid enough to actually act. Oh yes, and he's also blind, which means his Godly visions are more better than yours, so there. But Fong means business too! The sign on his office door reads: "Joe Wong, Private Investigator, Bounty Hunting, Conflict Management, Kung-Fu Fighting Lessons and World Headquarters of the Wei Kuen Do Association". (and yes, that's supposed to be funny) When he's not blasting away scumbags at his local deli ("Hey, forget the ham sandwich!"), taking down redneck purse snatchers, or deflating stereotypes about Chinese food and Asian drivers in Big American Cars, he's rounding up a motley team of specialists to aid him on the rescue mission by staging a tough man contest that attracts ninjas, kung-fu masters, Hispanic knife-fighters, black boxers, redneck purse snatchers and a female bodybuilder in red panties. Really. Frank Harris' direction here is a very slight improvement over his work on KILLPOINT, but it's Fong's screenplay that saves the day, using popular contempo action/buddy movie clichés to buttress his rather loopy main story. The puzzler here is real-life Ghanian princess Akosua Busia, who squanders the goodwill she engendered in Steven Spielberg's THE COLOR PURPLE by appearing here as Mitchell's conniving, sadistic daughter-slash-wife. Fortunately, her career would survive. One the plus side, Fong kicks Billy Blanks' ass, puts his foot THROUGH another man's head, and cuts the roof off a Mercedes-Benz hiding three goons who apparently can't find the door handles during the several minutes it takes Fong to run around the car cutting the roof supports. Hilarious stuff!

This movie reeks of 1980s, straight-to-video action: zero budget special effects, "filler" action sequences and some utterly loony acting. It may sound bizarre, but those are also the very reasons why I enjoy this film so much.

In comparison the action movies of today, Low Blow seems positively wholesome. There is not much blood, no sex and the emphasis is more on fist fighting than high-tech weaponry. However, the film is never boring. The action is fairly constant and there are occasional touches of humour along the way.

Leo Fong plays private detective, Joe Wong. Joe is hired to find a missing rich girl, Karen. Karen not only has a very unattractive hairstyle but is also completely moronic, as evidenced by her falling in with one of the most ridiculous cults ever depicted on film - complete with a black sheet wearing blind guru and a crazy woman played by real life Ghanian princess Akosua Busia. Leo Fong's dead-pan delivery and no frills martial arts style suit his character perfectly. A special mention must be given to Akosua who turns in the most ludicrous performance of her career.

After having his butt kicked trying to infiltrate the compound, Joe realises that he needs assistance taking out the wackos and naturally enough, decides to hold a tough man contest to find some extra muscle. The scenes of the contest are some of my favourite in the movie. The fights are brief but varied and amusing. I particularly liked the wrestlers and the bizarre iron lady with the blond mullet. The film then comes to its rather predictable climax with some fun action and a good dose of humour.