Battaglie negli spazi stellari

Where to begin? The clothes all look like they're from a 30's sci fi film, even though this was made in the 70s. The dubbing is terrible. The plot is almost totally incoherent; it centers around a hothead space captain who believes that he can make better decisions than computers, and therefore is always getting into trouble (though in this film, he's probably right considering that the main computer is called "The Wiz", no kidding!). The characters actions often don't make any sense, like one scene where two crew members die, but everyone else is happy for no good reason. The evil giant robot looks like something they made on purpose to make people laugh, but you're supposed to think it's scary. Throughout everything, the deadly earnest and serious tone of the acting and story just makes the whole experience more surreal and more funny. My favorite scenes: destroying the giant robot/computer, and the space command guys dealing with the reporters. This film is worth seeing with a bunch of friends, with or without any substances that may enhance one's sense of humor!

I am tempted to mention the fact that The Film "Mission to Mars", directed by Brian DePalma, bears a strong similarity to this film.... there, I've mentioned it! One of the most remarkable things about this film is the fact that "Star Wars: A New Hope" came out in the same year. Despite the title, this film bears no resemblance whatsoever to Star Wars. However, I should note that its own title is completely unrelated to the film as well. There is no war, really. But films without plots are hard to name, so c'est la vie.

This film stars a lot of good looking actors (both male and female), though they are all too thin, just like the script, and the special effects. The technology depicted in the film is reminiscent of the first Star Trek series or even Lost in Space. The special effects are variable. Some are actually fairly decent miniature shots, but then there are a few cardboard cut-out sequences reminiscent of some of Terry Gilliam's animations in Mont Python's Flying Circus. The behavior of the actors is sometimes inexplicable, but the dialog is so bad that you hardly even notice. For example, every time the entire crew of the spaceship is about to die (and this happens a lot), they all stand up and cheers and hug each other when they survive. various subplots are developed and then abandoned (just as well IMO) and, towards the end, it almost seems as if we are going to get a coherent story-line. Maybe they ran out of film? This film is a hoot. I recommend it highly for bad film buffs and MST3K fans. MST3K probably avoided this because it was a too-easy target.

Isn't it interesting how often in these poor science fiction, there is a loose cannon. In this one, it's a commander that is fed up with being given instructions by computers (in this case it's called the WIZ, believe it or not.) He take his crew to an unfriendly planet and gets them embroiled with a robot controlled society. They push a button and destroy the robot. If only people from eons of civilization had decided to push that button. The acting is horrible. I kept trying to recognize the voice of the commander (dubbed, of course), and I realized it sounded like Clayton Moore, the guy who played the Lone Ranger. I know it's not him, but it has that same nasal quality. I did get a kick out of the guys with funny red suits with the little caps. They look like they were created by some sixties fashion designers. It drags and drones on for an hour and a half. There isn't much that happens that is memorable.

There are Bad sci-fi films, there are Rotten sci-fi films, there are even the Worse sci-fi films. However, this film is in the rock-bottom Bad, Rotten and Worst category. The music and the special effects (nothing more than weird, spiraling colors) give you a headache, and the costume designer committed suicide after completing the crew's uniforms. Humans haven't worn hats like that since the 11th century.

But the film has one saving grace. This takes place in two ridiculous scenes where the commanders back on Earth try to brief the press, all of whom act like they are suppose to portray air-headed journalists. With reporters like these assigned to a BIG STORY, only God knows who is handling national local news. I shudder to think, but then we see their like on TV every night.

The absolute best lines in the movie go to the two commanders who, after trying to convince the reporters that Earth is not in trouble but seeing the reporters rush to their communications devices to tell their editors that the end is near, say to each other:

First commander: "They didn't buy it." Second commander: "No way."

This film is so bad it makes David Bowie's The Man Who Fell To Earth look like a science fiction classic.a

I get a big kick out of these Brescia space movies so sought out "Battle of the Stars". Most of the comments here, and even the plot outline, seem to be about another lovely Brescia movie called "War of the Planets".

"Battle of the Stars" is about an alien invasion of the earth. The Gonians have used up all their natural resources and are now a dying and decaying species. They arrive in their spaceships with their super computer to take over earth and use our healthy bodies to replace their own. With space mummies, the super computer (same prop from War of the Planets!), and their ability to take the shape of trusted humans, the Gonians need to sabotage the Earth defense system before their entire invasion fleet can land. Defense system designer Mike Layton, his pretty girlfriend/scientist Diane, and a couple helpful Gandymedeans are our only hope!

Five stars for being "out there" and fun!