Sharkansas Women's Prison Massacre

Want to see past-her-prime ex-pornstar Traci Lords and once-promising actress Dominique Swain battling ravenous CGI sharks in a flooded women's prison? Who wouldn't? Unfortunately, Sharkansas Women Prison Massacre is not that film. The name Jim Wynorski mean anything to you? If so, then you probably already suspect that this isn't going to live up to the impressive title. Wynorski's movie doesn't take place in a penal institution, 'cos that would cost too much money; instead, it's set in a swamp, where a group of big-breasted jailbirds (dressed in regulation tight white vest and denim hot-pants) are on work detail when they are attacked by prehistoric fish released from an underground ocean by fracking explosions. Meanwhile, Detective Kendra Patterson (Lords) and her partner are on the lookout for the missing prisoners.

Even though the ladies in this film are well-endowed, their impressive mammaries are kept under wraps, the closest the film comes to delivering any nudity being a quick dip in a hot-tub, although the bikinis stay on throughout. As for the shark action, there's a lot of shots of dorsal fins sticking out of the ground as they burrow through the dirt (these sharks are as deadly on land as they are in the water), but not much else is seen of the fish. Not only does the film scrimp on the bare flesh and the sharks, but there's not much gore either. In fact, unless you're a particularly big fan of any of the 'actresses' involved, or a sucker for punishment, I would probably avoid this like a hungry great white.

There are already 50 shark movies and most of them are weak even for the fans of the shark attack films. This one is not the worst but actually quite hilarious one.

Somebody blows up something and the prehistoric monsters are released (which time already? Dinoshark, Malibu Shark Attack, Jersey Shore Shark Attack, Megalodon, Jurassic Shark). Parallel, some good looking female prisoners are taken to the forest for some involuntary work. Nobody knows that one of the ladies is organising an escape plan. On the way back the prison truck is ambushed by Rayne - the vampire slayer and a lover of one of the prisoners. Nonetheless, their plans to reach for freedom are quickly revised by river/sand sharks. The local area is also investigated by two agents - Sculder and Molly I presume.

This flick contains everything bad you can get in a shark attack film. It also has everything charming concerning the amateur productions. The special effects are practically none, most of the attacks happen in an off-screen fashion. There is a cheesy romance subplot, god knows what for. However, I must say I was interested in the events. Why? Because the humour was really good. Actually it makes you go throughout the movie quite quick and fortunately it's only 80 minutes long. So normally it would be like 3/10 but I gave more for the funny parts.

This is awesome, everything a good b grade movie should be except for being surprisingly low on gratuitous nudity given the subject matter.

Underrated movie methinks, i'd have it at least 2-3 rating points higher than jurassic world, i mean it's sh*t and ridiculous but at least it knows it's sh*t and ridiculous and doesn't pretend it isn't and didn't cost the GDP of a small nation to make.

The CGI is an embarrassment but that's OK cause you're too busy laughing at this movie jumping the shark by introducing us to prehistoric amphibious land sharks, the acting is a little better than horrendous which suits the tone of the movie perfectly.

There wasn't a great deal of logic or sanity in the making of this film, someone just said f*ck it i wanna make a movie about prehistoric sharks that are somehow also capable of swimming through land (no, i am serious really you need to watch this) and have them eat all these prison porn stars that are on the most ridiculous work release program ever.

Highly recommend :D

This film is rather unique in that it combines the horror of a "shark movie" with the implicit sexuality of a "Woman-in-Prison" film while maintaining a made-for-television format. To that effect there isn't much gore, sex or nudity. However, there are a number of attractive actresses and plenty of action to keep things interesting for the most part. I especially liked the presence of Dominique Swain (as "Honey") and Christine Nguyen ("Michelle Alika") but there were several other young ladies that certainly brightened the scenery as well. On the other hand, the special effects were quite bad and the ridiculous plot involving prehistoric sharks that are able to move about on both land and water certainly didn't help this film overcome its low-budget nature to any degree. But let's face it, this movie was never intended to win an Academy Award in the first place. That being said, although I doubt most viewers will probably enjoy this particular picture, I found it somewhat entertaining--in spite of its rather obvious flaws--and for that reason I have rated it a bit higher than it might deserve. Slightly below average.

On the other hand a lot of other things are also out of sight. Or rather not to be seen. While some may expect nudity in this, the female cast does look nicely even with their clothes on, it is rather sad that the gore is missing. At least for me that is true.

The CGI is as obvious (=bad?) as you'd expect it to be in a (s)low budget movie. The acting can not always be called that - or it would be an offense to actual acting. That rings especially true in the beginning with our two characters that incite ... the inciting incident. Not a lot good to be said here, this was a waste of time and I think you will feel the same for the lack of many things (some of which I have mentioned)