Apocalypse Pompeii

Oh My God I have seen some bad films in my 65 years of life, but this has to be the worst I have ever encountered. The acting was so wooden and the dialogue is brain damaging indeed. It is like been written by a ten year old kid and then directed by his ten year old friend. Why oh why spend money on making such crap I will never know. It feels like the two ten year olds woke up one morning and said let's make a disaster movie. No joke folks. The directors name is now embedded in my mind and I will for a while avoid anything directed by him. I feel like grabbing the writers, directors and producer by the neck and shaking them. Please please please do not bother with this crap. I actually forced myself to watch the first 25 minutes thinking that it cannot get any worse and it has to improve. Guess what? It got steadily worse until my brain screamed at me to stop watching.

This is a very low budget spaghetti movie, with the cheapest and worst special effects I have ever seen... the 30s called their special effects back ;)

Things are falling throughout the city, however the buildings and walls are not damaged in process. The English is lousy, the action is dull, the actors are boring, oh the horror. Action is slow, is there a plot line?

Couldn't be bored to watch more than 10 minutes.

Is this a movie, or some torture? Don't watch it, a waste of time. Words can not really describe how bad it is. Find some other movie.

Imagine a group of strangers involved in an apocalyptic event with no story and meaning behind their meeting. No development of the characters at all. Imagine volcano fumes that on one hand kill by-passers on the spot, but on the other hand are stopped by a glass&lead door. Imagine parents who take their daughter to a bus-trip to a volcano mountain, that is obviously waking up. Imagine all sorts of ridiculous things, e.g. a man going to a sort of job interview, coincidentally having with him 2 satellite telephones... Last but not least, imagine few busty slim cute chicks running away from a disastrous hot gases etc. And that would be the summon of evil of this movie :)

Another cash-in on a potential blockbuster by none other than The Asylum, of course. There is no doubt about that "Apocalypse Pompeii" has seen the light of day because of the forthcoming "Pompeii" movie, just as what The Asylum did when "Pacific Rim" was about to come out, then they put out "Atlantic Rim", or the "Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies" just prior to "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Slayer" came out.

Nevertheless, then I will say that "Apocalypse Pompeii" is actually not as bad as to be expected, and The Asylum did manage to put together a decent enough movie here. Sure, this is not a groundbreaking innovation in movie history, but still, it is enjoyable to watch - despite its predictability and cliché stereotypical built up.

The story is about an American family who has moved to Italy, and while the father Jeff (played by Adrian Paul) has to go to an important meeting, then his wife Lynne (played by Jhey Castles) and daughter Mykaela (played by Georgina Beedle) go to the ruins of Pompeii. A natural disaster takes place, causing Mount Vesuvio to erupt and the tourists trapped in Pompeii struggle to stay alive. Acting against the Italian government and American army, Jeff and his band of soldiers steal a helicopter to go to Pompeii to rescue his wife and daughter.

That was basically the entire storyline summarized in a few lines. The story is so predictable and cliché that it just drips with stereotypical ooze. There are no surprises here, and you see everything coming a mile away.

The acting in the movie was adequate for a movie of this caliber.

All in all, then "Apocalypse Pompeii" is good enough entertainment for a single viewing if you have nothing better at hand to watch or nothing better to do.

Seriously. If you set out to make the worst movie ever you could not do a better job than this. Even the workman-like acting and confusing accent of Adrian Paul, the commanding presence of John Rhys-Davies and the awesome bust of the lovely Georgina Beedle could not save this travesty of a movie. Truly one of the most appalling things ever committed to film. There are so many things wrong with it that it boggles the mind. It makes a Troma film seem positively Shakespearean. Where to start? The writing is probably the worst part of this, the story horrible, the "science" idiotic and the dialogue just plain stupid,followed by the wretched "sets." No doubt hundreds of dollars were spent on sets and special effects. I honestly felt embarrassed for the producers of this travesty, it was so bad. Stay away.