Rosewood Lane

This is a comment not a review. Knowing Victor Salva's history, how on earth did Rose McGowan end up cast in it?!?

Rosewood Lane has a premise that would be a sheer nightmare to experience first hand. To see it happen to shallow characters lessens the overall experience into a drab, ineffective muddle from a director clearly capable of churning out suspense on demand. Perhaps he works better with a higher budget and atmospheres that do not mirror those of soap operas.

Despite being surrounded with controversy regarding his molestation case on the set of Clownhouse, one of his first films, I've always respected writer/director Victor Salva in the field of suspense and ideas. The original Jeepers Creepers is a truly suspenseful horror film with solid writing, aware directing, and credible, memorable suspense. Its sequel is a tad hokey, with many flaws in its plot points and aesthetics, but overall, a capable horror film able to at least erect aspects that have made past thrillers successful. I didn't thoroughly despise it.

Rosewood Lane feels like a work in progress. Its actors are well-fitted for the roles, but everything else is the slowest of slowburn, only it isn't building to much of anything. Take Ti West's Innkeepers, a horror film released earlier this year. The film was self-aware of its atmosphere and completely capable of creating smart characters and intelligent, realistic dialog. Rosewood Lane feels cold and tone deaf, never achieving any suspenseful heights nor does it ever appear to be fully trying. Slowburn horror is one thing, but a film that progresses slowly as a distraction to show it doesn't totally know what it wants to do or what it's doing is an unfortunately lethal blow to a film's attempt at likability. The needless cat murder doesn't help its reputation either.

The plot: Dr. Sonny Blake (Rose McGowan) is a talk radio psychiatrist, working the late shift, giving random callers life advice and direction. Dr. Blake decides to move into to her childhood home after her alcoholic father dies, and upon moving in, meets the deeply inept, sociopath paperboy Derek Barber (Daniel Ross Owens), who lives next door. The paperboy, who may or may not have had some sort of relationship with her father, pesters Blake into oblivion, but the results are not taut and scary, but almost inherently laughable. Her first clue that something strange is up is when she sees that her dresser of nick-nacks has been rearranged by someone not herself. For a TV horror film made for a network like USA, or even Lifetime, perhaps that would be mildly frightening. For an audience hungering for tricky tactics of suspense from the man behind Jeepers Creepers, this is pretty third-rate material.

The performances are clearly gifted. Rose McGowan is admirably convincing in scenes that rest on her shoulders, and one of my favorite character actors, Ray Wise, is present, playing a detective hellbent on convincing Dr. Blake that nothing is happening. Despite something clearly being up, he persists that there isn't, and scenes following ones of that nature continue to play out this long, winded excursion of, strange kid does something, victim notices, victim contacts boyfriend and detectives, they say she's crazy, etc.

One wonders if Victor Salva aspired to make something more frightening, and one contemplates if the clearly miniscule budget paralyzed him to work with just the bare basics of horror filmmaking. If life is kind to him, he will make more films. Ones more impressive than Rosewood Lane, hopefully. And hopefully ones that don't feel gridlocked to conventions.

Starring: Rose McGowan, Daniel Ross Owens, and Ray Wise. Directed by: Victor Salva.

If you recognize the line in my title then you might want to turn away because you won't be able to sit through this movie with a straight face. Through no fault of "Rosewood Lane" which otherwise is a good thriller, it dives into a plot that seems so preposterous that it became the running gag in the hilarious 80s dark comedy "Better Off Dead". That plot is, of course, that a supernatural psycho paperboy terrorizes the town.

Excuse me, I just spewed milk out my nose.

OK getting serious for a minute, "Rosewood Lane" handles itself very well. It should be noted that it is NOT a horror movie; it's a thriller. And, as the filmmakers explain in the "Making Of" feature, that means it has a slower pace, more character development and more atmospheric investment than the average slasher. Aside from a death in the opening scene, half the movie focuses on the main character's psychological complexities (growing up abused, dealing with newly surfaced demons of her past, a failed relationship, issues of professional ethics, and perhaps a slight nod to her OCD). While this side of the movie doesn't provide many popcorn spilling shockers, I thought it was a new & interesting angle of approaching the protagonist. In a sentence: she's just 1 psychology degree away from the looney bin, herself.

So when she starts seeing a psycho paperboy stalking her around every corner, we're not quite sure how much is real and how much is delusion. I think Rose McGowan did an excellent job of playing a tough, mentally guarded character who is overcompensating for deep, suppressed issues which she probably hasn't conquered as she'd like to claim.

Another good acting job comes from Daniel Ross Owens (creepy paperboy) who, though perhaps looking too old for the role, pulls off the psychotic thing really well, particularly in an awesome "laugh" he delivers toward the end. You'll know the one I'm talking about.

So in the end I recommend this movie to anyone who is not expecting a horror flick but rather a slow moving thriller with some good momentum. In style/feel alone (not in story!) I might compare this to "The Sixth Sense" because it has an atmosphere of darkness with a surreal quality lighting the main actors. In other words it has a dreamlike quality to it, not stark realism. I thought that was a nice choice considering the psychological spin. In the interviews, the director mentions Hitchcock (in particular "Psycho") as perhaps a strong influence, and I can definitely see that, the way the house at Rosewood Lane becomes a sinister character itself, like the Bates Motel.

But... oh lordy help me, I just couldn't get those 80s paperboys out of my head. If you see this movie, then just for laughs afterwards, AFTERwards so not to spoil it, go to YouTube and search for "Better Off Dead two dollars" and you'll see what I mean. Even the foot-in- the-door gag is there, making me wonder if it was a direct homage. Well you know what they say... ghoulies & ghosties & long legged beasties & paperboys who go bump in the night...

Reveiwing a movie is open to our own personal opinion and everyone is entitled to there own opinion. For me I read all reviews posted here and although I enjoyed this movie I do agreed with some of the negative reviews that states that it was slow moving and a bit lacking on thrills. That alone however doesn't mean it was a bad movie or as some state "aweful waste of time." Now to add to there points they start reviewing the size of an actors lips, or the age of another who supposed to be a kid or even criticize product placement in the first have.

I think that when you have to find such small items to pick on then in fact the movie wasn't all that bad. Other negative reviews write sentences with single words longer than my complete name put together. But if you read exacting what they are writing and yes with the help of a dictionary you soon realize that some just use big words to give themselves a certain look because at the end of there conclusion all those big words just basically mean nothing, just like a politicians reply to a question he doesn't want to really answer honestly.

I'm not saying this was a great movie but I am saying that I enjoyed it. I did not get that "hey I was robbed "feeling once it was over. Sure It had some unanswered issues but nothing major. They could have done certain things differently yes but they didn't. What I watched is what they did and I must be honest on what I saw. Good . Good movie.

One thing though is that they call it a horror film and that is where maybe some of the bad reviews are coming from. Disappointed horror film fans. This is not a horror film but I would say more of a mild thriller. If I was in the mood for a good horror film and saw this I would have been disappointed too.

Or rather don't get there, if you know what's good for you. Something our main protagonist seems to ignore. But I think that's not the only thing that people were missing in this movie. While it is a nice change from the Jeepers Creepers franchise for Victor Salva, he doesn't seem too much at home with this.

I wish I could share Ray Wises enthusiasm for that film (I'm guessing the script read a lot better), but I can also see what he liked about the movie. There are some genuine scary or at lease eerie scenes in it. Plus you've got a bad guy in here, who's really good (at being bad). The acting is above par, but for all the weird things that happen, there are other things that will not completely satisfy your viewing needs.