Giant mutated spiders attack model buildings in this absolutely dreadful monster movie. There will be some people out there, mostly relatives of the cast and crew for instance, who will no doubt say I am missing the point when I call this film one of the worst, most amateurish films ever unleashed upon an unsuspecting public. They will say, "Don't take it too seriously. Take it in the spirit in which it is offered, as a spoof of Japanese monster movies, and 'Return of the Living Dead.'" True enough. The film is essentially a spoof. The only interesting moments were when the filmmakers made obvious references to other, much better, films. Still, for a spoof to be successful, like "Shaun of the Dead" or even "Scream," the filmmakers must show some basic competence. That's the problem here. No competence is shown in any category. We have bad writing. Bad acting. Bad direction. Bad cinematography. Bad costumes. Bad sets. And horrible special effects. Friends of mine were making better films on Super 8 with train sets and plastic dinosaurs when they were in the fifth grade. This is not a professional product. It shouldn't be sitting on the video shelves with real movies.
The funny thing is that I saw "The Witch's Sabbath" a couple of months ago and thought it was absolutely horrible. Who could have guessed that that film represented a quantum leap forward in Jeff Leroy's directorial skills. And it did! This movie ranks alongside "Ax 'Em" as perhaps one of the worst movies ever made. The first thing Jeff Leroy should do every morning is pray for the continued health of Michael Mfume because if Mfume died, he would surely be the worst director alive in his stead.
And to think they even made a sequel.
The distributor has nothing but contempt for the audience.
(Kudos to the person who entitled their review "Crappies." I would have done it if you didn't.)
