W.B., Blue and the Bean

They obviously spent a lot of money on this one. There are locations shots, helicopters, explosions, horses, Mariachi sombreros. It's an aimless adventure flick that's supposed to be funny. The people are all caricatures but don't pull it off. I'm not saying it isn't a little fun. It's a TV kind of movie with little real development. A series of episodic rescues. Underlying everything is the fact that people are willing to kill or be killed without really looking into the realities of everything. Linda Blair. What a career. She looks a little frumpy for a leading lady. Hasselhoff is all blue eyes and testosterone. But it is just a bunch of chases, automatic weapons, body parts, some nudity. Just to drag a few people into a movie theater or to watch a video. Like a thousand things I've seen before with almost nothing to recommend it.

Bail out is one of the best movies of all time. David Hasselhoff is the greatest actor ever. This movie displays his unbelievable acting abilities. I have never seen a movie like this. I mean, I was seriously touched while watching this movie.

Hi, Everyone, Let's see... we have some scenes in a mansion, a few shots of Skid Row, a Go-Go bar, 50 guys on horseback, a helicopter, a big dog and a van crashing through a warehouse door. OK, there's our plot.

Now we need some actors who work cheap. Hassle...who? He's still alive? Yeah. Linda Blair. I owe her a favor. She let me cut in front of her in line once at the Unemployment Office.

In this bankruptcy of a movie production, Linda Blair shows she is tougher than David Hasselhoff. Hasselhoff gets the last laugh, however, because he is prettier than Blair.

Casting is usually done in a way that will make the movie better. Kevin Bacon and Drew Barrymore could have had some fun with this. It would have destroyed their careers, perhaps, but it would have been much better.

A better bail bondsman movie would be "Midnight Run." Charles Grodin did get laughs in that film. Charles Grodin would have done a good job in Bail Out but he could not make this into a great movie.

The background music is good. There is a lot of senseless action. Most of the senseless action was the director handing the daily footage to the editor.

Tom Willett

My review was written in February 1990 after watching the film on Vestron video cassette.

Better known by its awkward original title, "W. B., Blue and the Bean", "Bail Out" is an okay action picture released direct to video.

Three title characters are nicknames for David Hasselhoff (as "White Bread"), Tony Brubaker and Tom Rosales, who play skip tracers hired by Charles Brill to protect heiress Linda Blair. She's out on $1,000,000 bail after being apprehended with a boyfriend who's holding drugs. Warring Colombian and Iranian drug lords lead everyone on a merry chase south of the border until Blair finally realizes Hasselhoff is a good guy and starts to cooperate with him.

Helmer Max Kleven, whose second unit directing credits include topnotch films like "Runaway Train", delivers solid action footage here and maintains a light touch. It's the type of picture that used to be drive-in fodder and is of only minor interest to Blair fans, since she is more damsel in distress than action heroine this time out.

Bail Out is a silly action/adventure/comedy which isn't very funny, at least not intentionally. The original title "W.B., Blue and the Bean" (which appears after the end credits, while "Bail Out" is the title in the opening credits. Did they forget to change it?) should give some indication of the movie's intentions.

Roger "White Bread" Donaldson (or W.B. for short) (The Hoff) is a part-time tennis instructor and part-time bounty hunter. He has two associates - you guessed it - Mason "Blue" Walcott (Tony Brubaker) and, of course, The Bean (Tom Rosales). When heiress Nettie Ridgeway (Blair) is abducted by drug lords (led by Cummins of Action U.S.A. (1989) fame as Zaldizar) and spirited away to Mexico, it's up to our three heroes to save the day. They have to get her to court on time in order to collect a million dollars. The three buddies want to open their own bail bondsmanship so they can stop working for the haranguing Aram Haronian, their boss. Will they succeed? While it is funny to see the mighty Hasselhoff with his mullet and giant cell phone hamming it up for all the world to see, and an attempt is made at politically-incorrect humor ("these guys drive worse than the Orientals!", "Roasted Colombians, nothing' finer!", etc.) sadly it all seems a bit forced and unfunny. Once they get to Mexico, there is a stereotype Mexican character that is very, very annoying. The movie was already on pretty thin ice by then, and the addition of this character did not help at all.

There are some car chases, shootouts and horseback riding, and the cast is full of familiar faces such as Trejo, Flower, the Hoff, Blair, and a surprising appearance by Gregory Scott Cummins as the drug lord. We were so used to seeing him as the all-American good guy from Action U.S.A. He truly has a lot of versatility. John Vernon is also on hand as Linda Blair's father. What is he truly up to? Nothing really weird or truly noteworthy happens in Bail Out. It's all pretty standard fare, so stupid at times it almost insults the audience's intelligence. We know it's a direct to video movie starring The Hoff, but come on. Give us some credit here. But then again it was directed by Max Kleven, the "mastermind" behind Fugitive Champion (1997). At least Chip Mayer was nowhere in sight. So if you can survive all the groaners for jokes and some middling action, you MAY be entertained by Bail Out if you are in the right mood (i.e., a really goofy mood).

Bail Out was released on VHS in the U.S. on the great Vestron label. We couldn't find any commercially-released version of the film under the "W.B. Blue and the Bean" moniker. If you have a picture of that, please send it in.

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